The date approaches. 6 Days, 9 hours, 19, 18, 17…minutes to race day. The Athlete Guide was FINALLY published and the angst, anxiety and gnashing of teeth set in full force.
2 Transition Areas, 3 bags, a “green” transition area – meaning if you don’t put your stuff back into a bag then it will be thrown out, mandatory meetings, 3 penalty cards & you are DQ’d, failure to report to 1st aid station & get your pic taken after issuance of a penalty – DQ’d. Drop 1 piece of trash, bottle in wrong location – penalty. Closer than 4 bike lengths – penalty. Don’t pass fast enough – penalty. The pdf file athlete guide is 27 pages. I got so sick of scrolling up down & all around that I finally sent the friggin thing to the printer so I could more easily read it.
I was a total wreak after trying to get through the guide a few times. That damn guide had stole my joy, my peace of mind. THEN, I went to see my Chiropractic doc cause I was having some lower back pain with it radiating down my right leg (sciatica flaring up again) and some mild hip joint pain after running and was told that, of course, I was back out of alignment. I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS. I need to get my chi back …and then I thought about a song that has been stuck in my head recently: Titanium.
That guide SHOT ME DOWN – got all up in my head and started doing the happy dance all over my goals & visions of fun in the sun – BUT I GOT UP – fugg that. I got this. I going to get in at least 5 sessions of Bikram Yoga and straighten myself out while getting my Namaste on. I spent the weekend doing a little planning, laid my stuff out and decided that all of that – that guide – was the white noise of doubt & fear; which is not of God. I can do this. I will do this.
Fear, doubt, anxiety…DISMISSED. BYE BYE. How?
I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall
I am titanium
6 days, 8 hours, 45 min…so, in the words from the song “The Fighter” – WHAT YA GONNA DO?…I’m gonna go down there and…
Give em hell, turn their heads
Gonna live life 'til [I’m] dead.
Give me scars, give me pain
Then they'll say to me…
There goes the fighter…Here comes the fighter
That's what they'll say to me