Fitness Challenges - Your Best Teacher is You!

I went to a Bikram Yoga session the other day and one of the common mantra's that the instructors use to get you to focus is - "look into the eyes of your best teacher". That would be you. Focus on you! Keep your thoughts from roaming around the room. Focus on you! I wrote about it the subject near the end of a 31 Day Bikram Yoga Challenge. This time the words sparked new thoughts on its meaning.

It got me to thinking about some of the bullshyat that I have been hearing (and apparently Ninteen69, MsPattey, TriBecca and a few other of my "Elite Athlete" friends) lately about some of the health & fitness challenges that we have all be taking on.

I admit that I LIED about not doing another Triathlon. The shyt is addicting...at least to me. I run races because, for me, they keep me on track & accountable. When you spend $40+ on a race, you just DON'T say fugg it - unless, of course, you got money to throw away. Go you! I also sign up for a bunch of other stuff because my friends are trying new stuff, accepting new challenges and just doing the damn thing where if you got nothing else - you have you health. Let me tell ya...all the money & stuff in the world means nothing if you have to use a walker, are on a respirator, carrying around an O2 tank or DEAD. I am their biggest fan & cheerleader. It is a whole lot easier when taking on a new goal to have people around you cheering you along - and EVEN BETTER - running/swimming/biking/jumping/lifting - whatever - beside you.

Let me tell you what sets this nice lady off, gets my fur all raised up (picture scared black Halloween cat) and makes me pull out my tazer...It's those back handed comments wrapped in an insult and/or those well meaning friends & family that want to warn you about the "dangers" of said event (like they would even have a friggin CLUE):

• You're crazy!
• Why would you do something stupid like that?
• You know you'll be radioactive after?
• Did you hear about all those people that got a skin disease from the water?
• You know your hair will turn green, looked fugged up or fall out, don't ya?
• All those weights your lifting will make you look like a Power Lifter- or make your body/shoulders all manish.
• You're going to look like one of those body builders with golf balls for breasts.

Name it. I've heard it. I also don't care. I don't care that YOU would NEVER do such and such. I don't care that YOU think its crazy, silly, dumb. I truly don't give a rats patootie what YOU think about what I WOULD do.

Just stop. If you can't manage a "Great!", "Good Job", or "I know you can do it" then just STFU.

Yet, that's prolly not going to happen. There are always going to be naysayers.

"Here's what I know" - aka MsPattey - The only person I NEED to listen to is me. I look in the mirror and look into the eyes of my best teacher & motivator and tell myself everything I need to know to get the job done. If I hear one of those backhanded comments, I just nod - uh huh - and push forward. Let me show you how its done! That ish just pushes me to go more, look for new challenges and JUST DO IT!

So, to all of my peeps out there taking on new fitness challenges and dealing with naysayers...

Look into the Eyes of Your Best Teacher - YOU!

And GET 'ER DONE! GO US!

I meditate, I do yoga, I chant...

...and I still want to smack someone!

Go Figure.

I really need people to stop the passive aggressive bytchassedness. I really need people to own their own messiness. I really, really need people to STOP thinking they can just pop off at the mouth with flippant comments meant to try and steal another persons joy/accomplishments... I also need same person to STOP acting all shocked, with indignation and feigned innocence when they get their azz tagged right back and/or called out for that bullshyat.

JUST STOP IT & OWN IT.

I just hate that phony bull. I HATE passive aggressiveness. I want to STOMP OUT bytchassedness in all forms from the earth. Sigh.

A recent email just set me to wanting to pull out the tazer and tap it on someones neck - fo sho. Don't sit there, send me an email with no salutation, no introduction - no nuttin - and then smart off about with "In the future, if you plan on sending out an email to the entire distro list, you might want to try using spell check if you want to impress anybody." (actually, the word WAS NOT spelled wrong, it was missing a letter at the end making the tense wrong - I DID use spell check azzhole) DA HELL!? You didn't even sign the message either - punk.

I appreciate constructive criticism & feedback, but that delivery was just downright rude. And since I didn't know the person at all, it made it all the more rude to me as I had no context to reference it against. If that had come from someone I knew or had a relationship with, then I could read it again a couple of times and try to "hear" that persons "voice/tone" before I had a reaction. SIGH Not the case this time.

I replied to the sender with a message that basically said "While I strive for perfection in all my communications, use spell check and edit before hitting send, errors do still occur. My error does not in any way diminish the accomplishment sent." Essentially, I really didn't care if I had a word in the wrong tense that made the note writer unimpressed - not a damn. Boy, Bye.

Well, this idjit sends me a message back all upset that I reacted to his "thoughtful" message. ARE YOU SERIOUS? Thoughtful. Here's how thoughtful would have sounded:
"TravelDiva,
Congratulations on the accomplishment. Just in case you didn't notice, one of the words was misspelled. I wanted to point it out in case you were planning to send this out to other media outlets. Happy New Year."

TONE, PEOPLE, TONE.

I would have been, OH! Let me get right on that. Thank you for the look-out.

This joker actually accused me of sending my reply to the whole distribution list (which I did not) and told me that he was outraged that I would react this way to his "thoughtful" message. Then he requested to be removed from the distribution list because "he doesn't have time for this kind of behavior."

BOY, BYE. You have been removed.

I don't have time either.

I think I'm going to have to do a double tomorrow before I shank somebody.

NAMASTE

Bikram Yoga - Can it do all that in 60 days?

I walk into Bikram Yoga Columbia today to get started (more like contemplate) on the 60 Day Challenge - it is day 2 of the challenge and I have to do a double this week sometime. I was kinda hemming & hawing about doing the challenge but I managed to drag myself over to my studio in this freezing hawk. I told myself "I'll see how I feel."

The minute I walk into the studio - "TravelDiva, you are doing the challenge, right?" and from several more people - "Did you see the article in "O" Magazine?" Well, as a matter of fact, I had not. Come to find out, nobody had actually seen/read the article. Most thought it was a blog thing talking about one woman's experience doing the 60 day challenge. Everybody was going on and on about how I had "done that already" (click link to go back and read my post about my very first challenge) and I should write to Oprah, etc. etc. It was very flattering and I was like "hell yeah, we should do something on the studio site and chronicle this 60 day challenge."

Well, Bikram Yoga Columbia's finest instructor and studio owner, Kat, was already on top of it. She plans to take all of the participants photo's and measurements, do pictures and testimonies along the way with a grand finale at the end. FABULOUS. You know, of course, I will have to put in a blog post or two along the way.

As for the article in "O"...on the way home from class, I stopped at the store and picked up the magazine to check out what all the broo-ha-ha was about.

"She 's 80 pounds overweight, divorced, out of work, [depressed] and deeply in debt. She needs a physical and spiritual overhaul. Can 60 days in a Bikram hot-yoga studio really undo years of damage?"

The article is well written and I laughed my azz off at some of her thoughts and comments about the 60 days. I have experienced the same damn things:

• Why does everyone but me have a tattoo. Do I need one? What would I get?
• Will I EVER be able to contort my body (my fat) into a Japanese Ham Sandwich?
• I really don't want to "look into the eyes of my best teacher" (mine) cause the site is yuck.
• Will I EVER get to wear little boy shorts and a tiny bra? Do I ever want to?

So, can 60 consecutive days of Bikram Yoga give you a physical & spiritual overhaul? I don't know about anybody else, but for me, the answer is yes. When I couldn't run anymore because my knees were just not having it anymore, when my back was killing me, when I was self-medicating with cocktails and an occasional Xa.n.ax (sometimes together), when my nerves were shot, my weight escalating - I found Bikram Yoga and I found my stride again.

After about 6 months and 1 30 day challenge, I was back to running and completed the Clydes 10K, my back no longer hurts, I still have cocktails but not the pills. When my nerves get bad, I go to class and I'm finally losing some weight.

"They learned, as I am learning, that the body begins to crave Bikram - the heat, the moves, the comfort of healthy discomfort."

I couldn't agree more. I have yet to find an exercise this intense that requires so much focus, that clears your mind, that gives you permission to think only on yourself and your well being. A workout that not only transforms your body but your mind.

I love it.

Why don't you join me and see what 60 days of focus on YOU can do? I promise you won't be disappointed.

Bikram Yoga Etiquette at the MAX

Bikram's-Yoga-'Fat-Woman', originally uploaded by industrialbrand.

There are some basic rules or etiquette for everyone to follow when you are taking a Bikram Yoga (or any yoga probably) class such as be on time, don't disturb other yogi's with a lot of movement, don't leave the room, don't wear a lot of perfume etc, etc.

Those are the basics. Good to know. Respectful stuff so that everyone can enjoy the class and get the most from this torture...oh, I mean 90 min moving meditation.

However, after the class I attended last night; where there were like 48 people in a room that holds 50, there needs to be some additions. When the studio is at the MAXIMUM I'm going to need some of ya'll to go the extra mile (matter of fact - JUST DO IT ALL THE TIME - so when you come upon a maxed out class you are ready).

1. CUT THOSE FRIGGIN TALONS you call toe nails. When you are lying on your stomach with the bottom of your feet facing up to the ceiling. I SHOULD not be able to see your damn toe nails curving around to the bottom of your toes. THAT MESS LOOKED LIKE RAGGED DAGGERS and I was so afraid that you might stretch back and put my damn eye out. GROOMING, PEOPLE, GROOMING.

2. Guys...Imma need it to be a friggin requirement that you wear a gosh darn jock strap or some thing to STRAP THOSE PUPPIES DOWN. I should NOT have to be rendered blind by mister willie peeking at me everytime we bend over or whatever. NOTHING should ever pop out. Those little jogging shorts are NOT appropriate. Cinch it up.

3. When the instructor says to move slowly, together. IMMA NEED YOU TO FRIGGIN DO IT, HEAR! Stop slinging your damn sweat all over everybody. THAT IS NASTY...and I certainly can't focus, stay still or hold my pose all the while trying to fling off your damn sweat. KEEP IT TO YOURSELF.

4. Now you know damn well that a lot of the postures are compression postures. You are going to be squeezing your GI track to damn death. I NEED everyone to try their damndest to GO TO THE BATHROOM before class. All that damn tooting and silent but deadlies are just UNCALLED FOR. Moist, hot farts are NASTY. We are trying to breath here, people.

5. I know we are all going to sweat like a cow on fire in class. I still think it should be a requirement to FRIGGIN BATHE YO AZZ before you come to class. Once again, we are all trying to breath and breathing in your butt funk & pitt funk is just too much to bear.....and ladies - I know that yoga is all zen and ish but that hairdo you are growing out under your arms is NASTY. I'm just sayin. SHAVE - Jeeze.

I love me some Bikram Yoga. If all would just comply with some of these additional etiquette tips, I would enjoy it that much more.

I'm not saying...I'm just saying. MmmmKay.

Bikram Yoga: The Challenges of Being Breast Blessed

Bikram Yoga is an addiction for me...and an amusement. It amuses me to see how far I can push, twist, stretch & bend my body. I love the challenge and keep going back for more...to see if I can make a breakthrough each day.

One thing that almost always gets me chuckling to myself in the middle of class is attempting to do the poses which require you to put your forehead on your knee. I don't care how flexible you are, if you have breast that require anything larger that a C-cup for support - IT IS HIGHLY UNLIKELY THAT IT IS GONNA HAPPEN FOR YOU...without actually suffocating on your own breast tissue.

Seriously.

I'm a 42D on a good day and no matter how much I try to

• Strap these puppies down
• Tuck my face in between them - yeah in the cleavage
• Tuck my chin, suck in my stomach so hard that my intestines are shoved down into my cervix, and rolling one vertebrae at a time down
• Pull on my heels, the ball of my foot or any other part of my body till I'm crunched in half

I'm not going to be able to get my forehead on my cotton picken knee. I keep trying. I keep almost passing out from lack of air. Yes, Yoga Torture Instructor (aka - my Bikram crack supplier) I am cutting off the supply of blood to my brain. Practice will make perfect. *SMH*

I've looked around and my fellow big breasted yogi's are all having the same issues. Occasionally, I catch the eye of one of my BBY's and we share an amusing smile and keep on truckin.

I'm off to another class today...I may not get my head on my knee, but I'm gonna try to stick toe today (at least on my left side). Nothing but my fear in the way of that pose. Fear I can get rid of...the 42D's...not so much.

Just WAAAAY to much Sweat

Day 91:Chemical Calisthentics, originally uploaded by aalexa.jeann.

I picked up my practice of Bikram Yoga again today after a hiatus over the Christmas holiday. The class this morning was pretty packed but you still had plenty of room in order to not violate anyone's personal space with your sweat.

I found a nice space right up front. One of the instructors was on one side of me and a lady with some seriously weird looking pants on was on the other side of me. I didn't pay weirdy pants much attention besides thinking that "Damn, she sure is gonna be hot", cause her pants looked like they are made out plastic.

I am well aware of how much you sweat when doing Bikram Yoga and am not easily grossed out, but weirdy pants was so freakin gross with the sweat today that I thought I was gonna hurl. Just the damn sound of her sloshing around on her mat and in her on damn pants was enough to make me gag. Every 2 poses she would pull open the elastic around her ankles and let a flood of water out of her pants. *GULP* I just had this nasty, wet, sloshy sound of excess bodily fluid that would make the most stout of heart swoon.

There were times that I just had to lay there cause my stomach would turn over every time she "drained" herself. I was just mortified. I thought for sure that she would eventually drain her whole body of fluid...I've just never seen that much damn sweat. EEEEEEWWWWWAAAAAAAHHHHHH!...and then she would fall over from heat stroke. Humph.

Next time, if I see her in class, I'm moving to the other side of the room. I will not subject myself to that nastiness ever again.

Video Slide Show: 31 Day Yoga Challenge

Day 31: Namaste

Pose #26: Khapalbhati - Blowing In Firm Pose

It is done. Half Moon to Half Moon - 31 Day Bikram Yoga Challenge. Tonight was probably one of my best practices...prolly cause my Mom was there, taking pictures for a slide show I'm going to put together for the studio. I wanted to do my best for my closeup, ya know. I'll have pictures for you shortly.

The question I get the most about the challenge is "What did you get out of the challenge?" No free parking, no free classes, no free clothing. What I got out of it is hard to articulate. Since I'm packing for a tropical, bumpin' uglies with my own personal Fire Marshall sans kids trip to St. Lucia, (Don't hate the playa) I'll have to elaborate on that later. All I got for you right now, that keeps going through my mind is.....

NAMASTE

I respect that divinity within you that is also within me.

Simply put, namaste intimates the following:

'The God in me greets the God in you
The Spirit in me meets the same Spirit in you.'

In other words, it recognizes the equality of all, and pays honor to the sacredness of all and everyone, regardless of age, status or wealth.

So, I will leave you with this greeting...NAMASTE

Day 30: Looking Into The Eyes of Your Best Teacher

Pose #23: Sasangasana - Rabbit Pose

I always find it just a tad amusing, when the instructor (at least Kat) tells you at the very beginning of class to "come to focus, and look into the eyes of your best teacher." That may very well be true in Bikram Yoga, but I always chuckle a little to myself, that if I'm my best teacher - then no wonder my grades sucks. I wanna look up at the instructor and ask if she can just stand in my face and I'd look directly into her eyes - cause Kat is a damn good teacher. She is right, though. In the past 30 days, I have pushed, pulled, stretched, cajoled and coaxed my body to do things that I thought just were not possible. When I look at myself in the mirror, look at my "best teacher", I now know that I CAN! I DO have self-control. I DO have will power. I CAN make changes in my body. I CAN do anything that I put my mind to do and I can work through the ups & downs - the challenges & roadblocks that rear their ugly head to knock you off your path.

Pose #24: Janushirasana - Separate Head to Knee Streching

A long time ago, when I was in the military, I was given a plaque - an award for my service as an aerobics instructor on the military installation I was stationed at. I did it for free, after duty - because I loved it. At the end of an exhibition & workshop we (myself and some other instructors) conducted one Saturday, I was presented this plaque. It has been on the wall in my office for many years. I forgot it was there, until recently, and it made me think about the yoga challenge.

It says:

To Lisa Steptoe - On Being Relentless
You are Relentless - a firery, driving force that lets no obstacle, setback or challenge get in the way of a noteworthy goal.

Have you forgotten who you are? What you are made of? Sometimes it takes a "Challenge" to remind you of just how fabulous & strong you really are. I has for me.

Pose #25: Ardha - Matsyendrasana - Spine Twisting Pose

Tomorrow is the last day of the "Half Moon to Half Moon - 31 Day Yoga Challenge". I have to do two classes tomorrow to get in 31 classes and complete the challenge. No Problem...

I Am Relentless

Day 29: I Had A Bad Day - Breath & Let it Go

Pose # 20: Supta - Vajrasana - Fixed Firm Pose

picture from worldyogafoundation.com

Yesterday started out great. Sun was shining, the weather was nice and I was all set for doing a double session (I have two classes to make up). I went to the 9:30 am class and felt good; felt like I was getting my groove back. I had to race back home to meet the plumber Ron had called because he thought the sump pump was acting funny. The cloud started forming, moving in from the east and hovering over my head. Bummer.

Turns out it wasn't the sump pump at all, but actually the sewage injector pump. Okay. Now for the bad news. Amer.ic.an Ho.me Shi.eld covers almost every damn appliance, filter, pump, heater in the house, but it doesn't cover the sewage injector pump. Covers almost everything except shyat. Okay...sooooooo, ummmm, what does that mean to me, I ask? Well, it means that the repairs are gonna go from the standard $60 under A.H.S warrenty fee to $1500 not covered under plan fee. That'll drop you to your knees pretty fast. Hmmm, that's gonna make a small dent in the severage package.

Breath & Let it Go!

Pose #21: Ardha - Kurmasana - Half Tortise Pose

I start helping the guy clear away some of the carpet in the storage room were the pump is housed, got him the shop vac (he did the vac'ing), and opened up every window I could in the basement. Turns out that my shyat mixed with the rest of the occupants here at True Blessings is not as rosey and I like to think - NOT SO MUCH AT ALL. Shayt stinks. PERIOD.

Breath & Let it Go!

Pose # 22: Ustrasana - Camel

**As a side note...Camel is one of my favorite poses. I haven't mastered it like the picture above, but I can get all the way over backwards with my hands on my heels. It is an unbelievable sensation when you come out of it. I can't describe it, so you'll have to either take my word for it or come on over for a try.***

Anyway, Jason the Plumber (with a license) had to come back because he didn't have a pump on his truck. He'd be back in the morning to install....(he came 30 min after he said he would, I was impressed). I went on with the rest of the afternoon, waiting for a call with a job offer I was expecting. I nailed the interview (I've been at this game, both sides of the table, long enough to know when buying signals are given), cleared the background check and was just waiting for the offer. I got dressed for the 4:30pm Yoga class.

Class was great! I was feeling good. Walked out to my car, checked my phone - AHA! A call from California...this is it. I checked the message. I wish I had a picture of the look on my face as I listened to the message. It was if someone had just punched me in the stomach and knocked all the wind outta my sails. "Lisa, I just want to let you know that the hiring manager decided at the last minute to go in a totally different direction." WTF. What the hell does that mean? I called back to HR asking for more feedback that that simple azz ish and he said he couldn't give me anything more since that was all he was given and he was no longer the HR person on this position. Okay. I guess it wasn't meant to be after all.

I have to tell you...I was soooooooo effing disappointed. I am so tired of this whole effing process. I was so sure, so confident and now I have to start the hunt again at the beginning. I came home, ran to the safe arms of my personal Fire Marshall and had a short pity party.

Breath & Let it Go!

I've got great friends (Lots of Hugs) and an awesome Mom (who sat and watched a TV show with me that I know that she didn't want to watch - no platitudes, no words of wisdom from a woman who teaches bible study - just a "Get it out, it's okay and then we move on & by the way, it's happy hour somewhere." Just the plain comfort of your mommie - you're never too old.)

Breath & Let it Go!

God's Delays are NOT His Denials. The best is yet to come.

Namaste

Day 28: Happy Anniversary Bikram Yoga Columbia

Happy Anniversary - Bikram Yoga Columbia!

Pose #17: Salabhasana - Locust Pose

Here is an excerpt from YogaKat's Newsletter announcing the 1 Year Anniversary of the Studio:

We are so pleased and proud to be honoring our one year anniversary this weekend! To celebrate the occasion from November 7 to 10 you can earn a free class if you bring a friend and sign them up for the $25 intro. All memberships that weekend will be 10% off (excluding the intro, single and auto-debit). All Yogabela and Be Present clothing is 20% off right now. It's been an exciting year and a lot has happened... anything can happen!

We are living in a transformational, monumental and pivotal point in history. Whether or not you voted for Obama, his election is evidence that all things are possible. The yoga holds the same for each individual. When you look into your eyes the next time you practice know that anything can happen and it's all in your power and within your reach.

It's a new year for us at BYC! You know things would not be complete without a party. Mark your calanders for a pot-luck party at the studio December 6th at 6p.m. There will be a sign up sheet at the studio. If you can make it please come! We will also be celebrating the end of the Full Moon Challenge as well as welcoming back our new teachers. Again, many thanks to all of you, and we wish you the best as you continue your practice.

No yoga, no peace. Know yoga,know peace!

Namaste,

Kat Kelley-ChungBikram Yoga Columbia

Pose #18: Poorna - Salabhasana - Full Locust Pose

So, I'm into the home stretch of the 31 Day Challenge. 3 more days/5 more classes (yeah, I have two doubles left to do) and then I am off to St. Lucia for some R&R and Lord knows what else I might get into with FireMarshall Ron - now that I'm all super flexible and ish. I'll leave it to you to use your imagination.

And no, I am nowhere close to the picutre below of Pose 19...how bout it's enough to get my thights off the mat, but that is still a break through.

Pose #19: Dhanurasana - Bow Pose

IN MY WILDEST DREAMS!

Day 25: Setting Your Intention

Pose # Pavanamuktasana - Wind Removing Pose

I'm down to the home strech. Seven more days of the 31 day challenge left. Today I did a double to start catching up on the classes I've missed. I have to be honest...I am exhausted...I really want to bag this but I've come this far and just can't bring myself to quit with only 7 days left (actually 10 total classes for me).

At the start of each class that Kat teaches, she tells us to look at ourselves in the mirror, focus on our best teacher and SET OUR INTENTION for our practice. All I could think of as my intention was a motivational quote that a friend of mine sent me entitled - JUST ENOUGH.

The short version:

"Everything we do to build and become stronger helps us JUST ENOUGH for the time we are in."

My intention for each and every of these last bunch of classes is to do all I can in each practice to build on what I've learned & become stronger...and pray that it we be JUST ENOUGH for the moment that I am in.

Pose #15: Sit up

Here is the long version (I highlighted below the part that stood out to me the most in relation to this challenge):

When compared to our ambitions and our dreams minor accomplishments may
sometimes leave us feeling like failures. When we dare to compare our feats to the triumphs of others it sometimes becomes cause for giving up.

No matter how miniscule our achievements may appear every single completion brings us closer to the place we envision ourselves. There is no shame in wanting more but none of us can afford to sabotage our hopes in a pity fit simply because we are not at the place we desire. Learning to embrace early victories is what fuels the vision of further greatness. A marathoner is at best a jogger first. It is through
continued effort and determination that he or she finds the strength to run
distances that were once beyond their ability and imagination.

Expectation must always be at the forefront of our every effort. When we see ourselves performing at levels beyond where we are today, we are literally calling into being every possibility. There is nothing more joyous than when we step toward what was once a barrier and before long find ourselves crashing through its formidable walls. Everything we do to build and become stronger helps us just enough for the time we are in.

Pose # Bhujangasana - Cobra Pose

My body is telling me...Lisa, enough already. My mind tends to wander down that same path, but my mind & my expectations are stronger than the fleeting temptation of quitting. Perhaps it is just as simple as doing the harder right over the easier wrong. If I quit now, I might never get to see the formidable walls that I'm sure I will break through. I'm willing to stick it out and call into being possibilities that I just can't see yet.

Day 23: YES WE DID & Playing Catch-up

Pose #11: Tadasana - Tree Pose

I hosted a Election Night Results Watch Party last night to share this historic moment with some of my friends and family. We had 2 McCain/Palin supporters (my mother and one other brother). I have to give my mother her props and respect her decision and conviction. Moms had her reasons; she could articulate them and have an educated, reasonable discussion with you on her point of view and why she was voting the way she was. Moms stood her ground; was gracious and funny in the midst of a house full of Obama/Biden supporters. I love and respect her for that.

The "One Other Brother" that showed up is a good friend and we have known him for years. However, I could not for the life of me understand why he was voting for McCain. When we questioned him about it, he said that he was not really a supporter of McCain, that his vote for McCain was a vote against Obama. WTF! WHY against Obama we asked? Not real particular reason that I heard, no serious policy reason, nothing that I could grasp like I could with my mother. It was just insane. I am wondering what it is like to be on the wrong side of history? What do you tell your children when you couldn't even give adults a reasonable explanation. Sad for you, friend, sad for you.

I met another one of my "axe murderer friends" last night - Profunksticated - who was just as real, candid and just plain good people as he is on his blog. It was an absolute pleasure to make the acquaintance of another blogland friend.

Pose # 12: Padangustasana - Toe Stand Pose

It was so fun to have Erin and her posse of friends (YOUNG VOTERS) over, talking politics, having made an informed decision, and making their own choices. They were a blast. They sure can scream loud too!

Pose #13: Savasana - Dead Body Pose

So now that I have survived one of the most exciting days of my life and slept the peaceful sleep of someone in the Savasana pose above, I have to return to my challenge. I have missed 4 classes as a result of going to job interviews, 25th HS Reunion and a fierce hangover from the event the next morning. Humph! Guess what that means...I gotta do a bunch of double classes to finish up the entire series. UGGGAAAHHH!

Duty, Honor, Bikram Yoga.....those three words reverently dictate...AWWW HELL. It's just gonna suck BIG TIME.

Day 18: Hitting the Wall

Pose #9: Trikanasana - Triangle Pose
picture from the www.worldyogafoundation

Day 18 and today I felt like I was training for a marathon and had hit mile 15 of a 20 mile run. I hit the wall. There wasn't anything I could do in class today. My balance was off, my focus was off, I couldn't hold a pose. I had nothing.

If it wasn't for the instructor today, riding me hard and pushing me, I probably would have just layed there on my mat the whole class. I was drained, but I made it through. In the end all I could think was dedication & committment...cause what I really wanted to do was run screaming from the room.

I've got nothing earth shattering for you today. All I can say is that everyone who is doing some serious training eventually hits the wall. You just have to push through and persevere.

Also, don't take with you a Dora the Explora towel. Dora & Boots staring at you the entire time doesn't help. I can't help but think that the idea of looking for a backpack and asking the map how to get through the next 20+ poses was not helping AT ALL. Just a thought.

Pose #10: Dandayamana Bibhaktapada Janushirasana - Standing Separate Leg Head to Knee

Day 15: Yoga Etiquette & Why I Need New Friends

Pose #8: Dandayamana Bibhaktapada Paschimottanasana
Standing Separate Leg Stretching Pose
Picture from www.worldyogafoundation.com

Half way through this 31 day challenge - give or take a day - and all I could think about today was how to control the giggles and not violate some of the Yoga Etiquette rules. I was very unsuccessful today, no thanks to CreoleInDC.

Rule 1: Try not to be late as they lock the doors once class begins. I was late but managed to squeeze in before the doors were locked. Why was I late? Reading some craziness on CreoleInDc's site.


Rule 2: If entering class late, enter in between poses so as to not distract others. Yeah, well, I tried. I got in there right before she started but it took me a minute to get my stuff (mat, towel, water) situated. Sorry.


Rule 3: If you come out of a pose early, go directly into Sabasana or stand still - once again, so to not distract others from their focus. Every time I tried, my mind wandered to things like "worser" and why transvestites needed to take off their clothes to comense with a beat down. Giggling was bubbling up and I would fidget trying to stifle my laugh and be quiet. No so much.


Rule 4: Be still in between poses. Don't adjust your clothes, don't wipe, blink...just regain your breathing and relax. Focus & Be Still. Nope, just was not happening today. I couldn't help but wonder about the Mc.Don.ald manager and wonder about the seriousness of his injuries from getting hit by a "Wet Floor" Sign.


Here is the most important rule of all. DO NOT READ CREOLEINDC'S SITE BEFORE GOING TO ANYTHING THAT REQUIRES CONCENTRATION & FOCUS. You will fail.


Now that you know the rules...here is what I read this morning prior to going to class.

Warning! Before You Read This...

You have to watch the video and read her transcript of the event. I think I need another kidney transplant from laughing so hard. I hate her. D.E.A.D


I not only need new family, I also need new friends.

Day 13: Focus through Distractions

Pose #6: Dandayamana Dhanurasana - Standing Bow Pulling Pose

picture from www.worldyogafoundation.com

Since I have been a SAHM/W these past couple of months, I seem to have a lot of time to my self and my own thoughts. Never really realized how much white noise there is rambling around in my head till I had a lot of time to actually listen to it. When I was working outside of the home, I had so much going on (sales calls, contracts to write, teams to manage, dinner to cook, laundry to do, children to raise, husband to love....etc.) and rarely heard or even listened to the voices in my head. So, when the voices get loud in the day and your mind travels wide and far conjuring up all kinds of wild, fantastic, interesting, troubling thoughts & ideas...what do you do to focus/re-focus on the here & now? What do you do to be present in the moment?

At the start of every practice, the instructor tells you to become present in the moment...to commit to your practice, look yourself in the eyes and focus on yourself and your body. Somtimes (most times) this is hard to do. There are other people in the class, I can see them in the mirror - in my periphery. That ta-do list is being checked off or added to. And then there is always that one person who just thinks they know oh, so much more than the instructor and wants to march to their own beat. That one person who SIMPLY WILL NOT BE STILL in between poses, that one person who always does the poses the way THEY feel like doing them, that one person who ALWAYS does all of this in my line of sight...

That one person/thing/thought that distracts you from focusing on the task/moment at hand.

What do I do? BREATH.

Breath...look into your eyes or a central focal point and....breath. No matter how fast your heart and mind are racing...BREATH...clear your mind, relax and....BREATH. It sounds very simplistic, like it wouldn't work, but it does. DistractaGirl...ignored. I stopped even glancing at her, looked into my eyes on every pose (never took my eyes off myself) and BREATHED. The last couple of practices - I have been able to focus through the distractions of other people and my own mind and they have been the best sessions ever.

To focus through or in the midst of distractions...just BREATH and find your focal point.

Pose#7: Tuladandasana - Balancing Stick Pose

Day 9: Duty, Honor, Country

Pose #5: Dandayamana JanuShirasana - Standing Head to Knee Pose

picture from www.worldyogafoundation.com

The past 2 days, the only thing that has been running through my mind constantly is something I had to memorize while a cadet at West Point. It is something that we had to memorize, but over time at the academy, it goes from memorization to internalization...to a point of view of life, work, and character that sustains me. In the a little under 24 hours, I have done 4 1/2 hours of Bikram. Why, you ask? Well, I committed to 31 days/classes. If you miss one day, you have to make it up by doing a double. Yeah Baby! 2x in one day. Yup.

I missed class last Friday, so I scheduled to do a double on Tuesday (630am & 430pm). When the clock went off Tuesday morning, the first thing that entered my mind was:

Duty, Honor Country....

Those three hallowed words reverently dictate what you ought to
be, what you can be, what you will be. They are your rallying points: to build courage when courage seems to fail; to regain faith when there seems to be little cause for faith, to create hope when hope becomes forlorn.

...They build your basic character...they make you strong enough to know when you are weak, and brave enough to face yourself when you are afraid. They teach you to be proud and unbending in honest failure, but humble and gentle in success; not to substitute words for actions, not to seek the path of comfort, but to face the stress and spur of difficulty and challenge;...

Gen. Douglas MacArthur

When I was a cadet at West Point, I had a good portion of Gen MacArthur's speech memorized, but on Tuesday morning, knowing what was ahead of me, the only part I keep saying to myself was Duty, Honor, Country....get your butt outta the bed....Duty, Honor, Country....you made a commitment....Duty, Honor,Country...soldiers never quit....Duty, Honor, Country...those three words reverently dictate....Duty, Honor, Country.

At day 7/8, I was doubting whether I could actually do a full 30+ days - non-stop. But just when those whispers of doubt entered my head; just when I was ready to come up with some kind of excuse to stop, the words of Gen. MacArthur reverberated in my mind....Duty, Honor, Country...and what those words meant to me. Quiting would have reflected on my character and that just isn't me.

Duty, Honor, Country...(those words) create in your heart the sense of wonder, the unfailing hope of what next, and the joy and inspiration of life.

And that is just what I am getting out of my Bikram Yoga Challenge Experience.

Day 7: Do Not Fear

Pose #4: Garurasana - Eagle Pose

www.worldyogafoundation.com

You know, every time I post a picture of a pose, I always look at it and say - "Wow, that sure does look like a piece of cake." If you are thinking the same thing too. Just try one of these poses and make it look just like the picture. Hurts don't it? If it doesn't challenge you at all, you are either not doing it right or you are a practicing yogi - for years.

So what thought struck me today during my meditation?

Fear. I have got to learn how to let go and work through/past my fears.

Eleanor Roosevelt said, "You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do."

While Eagle Pose is not one of the postures that bothers me, there are a couple that are a serious challenge to me. Today, when we got to posture #20 (Fixed Firm), the instructor came said to me, "Lisa, you CAN lay back in that pose - exhale, let go of the fear I see and go back. Now."

I was afraid. Afraid it would hurt, afraid that I wouldn't be able to get myself back up, afraid that I would pull or rip something. I was afraid, but with the instructors encouragement and the realization that I will never get better & stronger unless I breakthrough - I exhaled, released my fear, relaxed and layed back. Now you are supposed to hold for 30 seconds - I gave em about 15 and then came back up. BREAKTHROUGH. I did the thing that I thought I could not do.

Fear and success can not reside in the same body... success can not be acheived if you are harboring fear in your mind. Exhale and let go of the fear.

Day 5: How Winning is Done

Pose # 3: Utkatasana - Awkward Pose
worldyogafoundation.com

This pose (the picture above is the last and most difficult of 3 parts to this pose) is a lot more difficult to get into and out of than it looks. Stand up with you feet approx. 6# apart (the width of both of your fists). Put your arms out in front of you, just like the picture. Press you knees together without moving your feet and slowly lower (to the count of 10) your body down till you are in the position above - you should lower yourself as if you are sliding your back down a wall - no leaning forward - SLOWLY. Keep your knees pressed together. Hold - back straight. Take a deep breath, press your knees together, and slowly bring yourself back up the same way you came down - as if your are sliding your back up the wall.

Uh Huh.

Today's class was not a big deal. It was crowded as hell, but otherwise uneventful. I had a check up at the doctors office after the class and one of the things I had to do was get weighed. I HATE weighing myself. HATE IT...and nearly had a nervous breakdown when the results were not what I had expected. I had only lost a 1 lb since last week and was freakin' pissed. I had kept the diary like the doc asked, I had worked my azz off in the gym this whole freakin week, I had done this and done that - I was rambling - having a hizzy fit....all the while my doc was telling me how great I was doing. She was happy with my diary, nothing she wanted to change and 1 lb was fantastic to her. She said it takes time. Keep up the good work, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH. I was pointing fingers, I wanted to blame something, someone. I wanted to quit - quit even bothering to try.

I left the doctors with my lip poked out, feeling sorry for myself. I planted myself on the couch, turned on the TV and started watching the latest Rocky movie (Rocky Balboa). When Rocky gave this speech to his son, Robert, I felt like he was talking to me. He reminded me how winning (in anything, any goal) is done. And I'm going to keep moving forward.

Rocky: I'd hold you up to say to your mother, "this kid's gonna be the best kid in the world. This kid's gonna be somebody better than anybody I ever knew." And you grew up good and wonderful. It was great just watching you, every day was like a privilige. Then the time come for you to be your own man and take on the world, and you did.

But somewhere along the line, you changed. You stopped being you. You let people stick a finger in your face and tell you you're no good. And when things got hard, you started looking for something to blame, like a big shadow.

Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward.

That's how winning is done!

Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna bebecause of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that!

I'm always gonna love you no matter what. No matter what happens. You're my son and you're my blood. You're the best thing in my life. But until you start believing in yourself, ya ain't gonna have a life.

Day 3: Not Everything is a Competition

Posture #2: Ardha Chandrasana - Half Moon Pose

I walk into class this morning and checked the Challenge sign up list to see how many people had signed up. Hmmmm. That's a lot, wonder how many will really finish. I went back to the locker room, put away my stuff and then went to set up my mat & towel. Whew, MY spot is still open (front row, to the right of the instructor stand) - I hate it when someone is in MY spot.

Class starts. Your supposed to look at yourself in the mirror, focus on yourself, your body, the pose - 90 minutes of moving meditation. "You are your best teacher." Uh Huh.

Lisa was NOT focusing on herself, she was competing with others in the room, unbeknown to them. Yep. I was kinda looking beyond myself in the mirror at spaghetti body chick or at the mother from the Incredibles and saying....DAMN, why can't I do that? I was, through sheer determination, trying to twist, stretch and bend my body just like SuperStretch who not only has been doing this for years but also probably weighs about as much as one of my thighs. Suddenly, my body decided to jack slap me back into reality (FOCUS ON YOU!, YOU STOOPIT AZZ) by delivering a sharp pain up the back of my leg. Gotch your attention now, don't I?

It was at that moment that I realized that NOT EVERYTHING IS A DAMN COMPETITION WITH SOMEONE ELSE. This is about focusing on me, listening to my body, and training my mind and my body to go further, deeper, be stronger. The only person I am competing with during this challenge is my own ego.

My ego. My thoughts. The white noise of my mind.

I could either spend this time competing with other people, hurting myself, not getting stronger or better. Or I could become "My Best Teacher", listen to my body, focus my mind and shame the devil.

By the way, I've pretty much got the left side/first part of Half Moon, the right side/second part - Not So Much.