12/30/10

I'm Too Old For This

12/28/10

Happy Birthday, Princess Erin

Personalize funny videos and birthday eCards at JibJab!

12/26/10

Mission: Christmas Gift Quest

My family did something pretty cool to give my my Christmas Gift this year...they sent me on a Gift Quest to find it hidden somewhere in the house. It was a wonderful surprise, a lot of fun and just made the day even more special.


I love my family SOOOOO much.

12/25/10

Happy Christmas


Happy Christmas from True Blessings Estate.

The Royal Family
Emperor & Empress FireMarshall & TravelDiva
The Queen Mum
Princesses Erin, Charlee & Cara
Prince Jordan - Heir to the Empire, Protector of the Realm
Lady Joan

12/22/10

The Horror...The Horror...



That was what I said over and over...The Horror, The Horror...as I tried to figure out a way to replace the images and information I had just viewed - all by accident - on these here Internets. By a fluke of random chance, I stumbled upon a Internet search that resulted in me finding out TMI about someone I have known for a gazillion years that I simply did NOT want or NEED to know.


As a result, I have decided to tell you this cautionary tale with as much (yet as little) detail as possible so that you - my friends, family, lurkers, bloggers & hopefully the very person I am talking about - will, for the love of all that is sacred & holy, learn how to UTILIZE & IMPLEMENT ALL social media PRIVACY & SECURITY protocols known to man.


SERIOUSLY!!!!


I thought most of us that use the Internet as our playground have some common sense by now about the seriousness and necessity of protecting your identity, your information, your BUSINESS on the information highway. With all the talk about FB privacy, locking or not your Twitter account, implementing a Goo.gl.e alert and other social media notices on your name, website, pseudonym, website so that you KNOW what, who, & where things are said about you---you would think that what I stumbled upon would NOT happen. In an age where employers are goo.gling a potential employees and even my daughters "check out" their dates..."if he ain't goo.ga.ble then he ain't" - you have to be REAL SMART about what and how you put stuff out there on the digital divide. IT IS ALL SEARCHABLE. IT CAN BE FOUND.


I thought that this person was very intelligent and web savvy... Well, I guess stupidity strikes every one of us at least once.


So, there I was, on my kids computer (YES! I deleted the history, cookies...all traces of what happened) because I was too lazy to walk up the stairs to get mine. I had several windows open at the same time (and I was cooking). I had FB, Twi.tter, Goo.gle Re.ad.er, iGo.ogle and my web mail client open to answer some email. Somehow (I SWEAR), I thought I was entering the first part of an email & then I hit enter to auto fill the rest. Well, I was NOT in my email client, I was on iGoo.gle and I had entered it into the search.


SWEET BABY JESUS! Lo and behold, the search of my friends email (which is also this person IM handle & blog alter ego) came up and revealed a side...revealed some highly personal...revealed some proclivities...revealed that the FREAK comes out at night. The search that came on just the 1st page was more information than I EVER wanted to know.


Please, don't get me wrong. I don't give a damn about how you get your freak on. I don't care what you do or how you do it or who you do it with. That's your business. But if you don't want people to KNOW about your fetish, your hidden desires or that you invite this stuff into your domain (you know that's how people get killed or producers get ideas for a new episode of Crim.inal Mi.nds or L&O:SVU) BY GIVING THEM YOUR DAMN ENTIRE EMAIL ADDY - then I would expect you to use some damn discretion.


If you want to be a closet freak, flip the script, do it hanging from a bungee cord - whatever floats your boat - AND you don't want your friends, family, co-workers or just any ole random person to find out about it...then I HIGHLY RECOMMEND that you DON'T use your fugging IM and/or personal email address as your user name or pseudonym on every scandalous membership site on the gosh damn planet. HOW FUGGING DUMB CAN YOU BE!


Now, I am left with the these images burned on my retina. Now, I know more about this person than I ever wanted to know. Now, I'm not sure that I can look at them the same way. I just don't know what to think. It's their business...I just wish they had protected their privacy and identity with as much diligence as they put toward soliciting another to HOLLA if they were interested in bbc.


Sigh.


What is the lesson here? Once again, if you don't care if people know that you have a preference for RT (whatever da hell that means) with some bbc then keep doing what you're doing. If you DO care and want to keep that part of your life private and all to your damn self...then IMPLEMENT SOME KIND OF PRIVACY PROTOCOLS!!


Use another user name or id that NOBODY but YOU knows. Get a separate email address to use to have your "friends" contact you at.


This has been a public service announcement. I'm just sayin.

12/20/10

Cookie Exchange & Holiday Party


Last night I hosted my first ever Cookie Exchange & Holiday Party (well...the cookie exchange to be exact...not hosting a party, LOL) and we had a blast. Everyone brought a dish, a confection (didn't have to be cookies if ya didn't want to) and a gift (optional) for a gift exchange.

The food was fantastic, the confections were divine - especially the chocolate covered red velvet cake balls provided by G-Baby - and the games & gift exchange was a blast. The picture below is the result of the "Christmas Tree" Game we played. Take a piece of green paper, fold in half, put behind back and try and tear a Christmas Tree out of the paper. These are the results. Ummm, yeah...that one (bottom row, 4th from left) is G-Baby's rendition. We were all wondering what could possibly be on her mind. Bwaaaahaaaahaaahaaa!!!! The men folk acted as judges and MrsC was the winning tree (bottom row, 2nd from right).

She also won the ornament scavenger hunt. I hid a pickle ornament amongst all of my indoor decorations and sent everyone on a hunt to find it. I wonder if it had anything to do with her love of pickles & having a baby on the way made it a cinch for her to find. Hmmmm....MrsC cleaned up last night.


We had a wonderful time laughing, talking, singing and just having a merry time. The men folk retired most of the evening into the theater which we dubbed "The Man Cave" and only came out for feedings.

I think this will have to become an annual event. I had a wonderful time...and I promise to make the Christmas Trivia game a tad easier next time.

Merry Christmas!


12/16/10

My Secret Santa ARRIVED!!!!

Lookie! Lookie! My Secret Santa package arrived yesterday...AND IT IS AWESOME!!!!

I have a wonderful new snowglobe to add to my collection and now the fight is on about whose picture gets to go in there. I'm thinking ME! but my family is going for a group shot. HUMPH. I got a lovely bottle of Shiraz- (MINE, MINE) - the most sparkley brooch on the planet (you know I love some sparkley) - and a lighter for my cigar fetish that has TRAVELDIVA engraved on it.

HOW FRIGGIN COOL IS THAT!!! I am so excited to be stylin at my favorite DC Cigar Bar with my own personalized lighter. NO BEEATCHES, get your own damn lighter. Bwaaahaaahaa!!! I was dancing round the kitchen with GLEE!

I love my Secret Santa gifts. LURVE THEM!!!

I have to thank Pserendipity for putting on this gift exchange togethere. What a wonderful way to meet new bloggers from all over the country. I enjoyed adding several new bloggers to my reader and delving into their stories in order to figure out what to send to my secret santa and just to live vicariously in their adventures.

Now...I believe I know who my Secret Santa is....DRUMROLL......


Am I right?!

Thank you Santa! What a wonderful Christmas it is.

12/15/10

Pam.per.d Che.f

I once, many years ago, hosted a Pam.per.d Che.f Party as a Bridal Shower for a co-worker. As a result of this event, I was able to get go-gobs of cooking items and accessories. Some of those accessories have been sitting in my draws/cabinets for years and never have been used. That apple corer - yeah - never. I also had this thing-a-mi-bobby that looked like a real fancy cake decorating thing. It had all of these tips and stuff.

SAT DER IN DAT DRAWER. SAT DER IN DAT DRAWER...

Until today. I decided to make a Shepherds Pie (a stew w/potatoes on top) and there was a picture of the cook using a pastry bag to put the potatoes on top. I was staring at the picture for a while and realized I had the thingy-mi-bobby in a drawer. Pulled it out and wha-la!




It was absolutely DELISH! ...and looked very pretty too! Glad I held on to that gadget. Now I gotta come up with something else to do with it.


Ya'll ever go to one of those "parties" and buy some ish that is still sittin in a drawer?


P.S. My Pam.per.d Che.f stones are THE BIZNESS!!!

12/14/10

Underpinnings


I am all for wearing the appropriate undergarments to not appear rolly polly, smooth out some bumpy areas or to not have that pantie line show up. I admit to owning every variety of Spanx and body shaper and specialty bra known to the modern woman.


This right here is an absolute NO! I will NOT squeeze my body into some kind of torture chamber where I can't breath, bend over or even sit for fear that my head would pop off. Tight & smooth is one thing...looking like you needed a medieval rack in order to squeeze your body into a sausage casing is another.


NOT CUTE. NOT SEXY.


A reshaping garment that doesn't hurt is what I've been told. Way better than a girdle or Spanx because it helps "reshape your body and lose weight if you want. SERIOUSLY?! GTFOOHWTBS. See I've tried one of these chastity harnesses on once and practically broke every nail and nearly suffocated getting it on. I was told that I would get used to it. WHAT!? I shouldn't have to get "used" to learning to breath again. I bet you lose weight...you can't swallow.


Am I the only one that thinks this is just WRONG. If you have one, how in the world do you do it?


For me, I'll stick with the gym, body shapers & spanx.


iCANT.

12/9/10

'Twas the Night Before Army-Navy

Careful...grown folk ARMY talk here. You've been warned.
GO ARMY!
BEAT DA HELL OUTTA NAVY WITH A STICK!

12/8/10

Bytchassness

Today I read one of the most appalling, disrespectful and just plain filled with bytchassiness blog posts EVER! It came from someone that calls himself a "man" & father. DA HELL.


Let me sum this up...this dumb, ignorant azz...:
- had unprotected sex with a woman he thought was unattractive, had bad acne and fat on the second date because he like how she jumped him...and surprise, surprise - he's a baby daddy AGAIN.
- thinks that putting out $1300 dollars over the past 6-8 months for diapers and odds/ends is doing it big in terms of child care and support for HIS CHILD.
- says it is his child, admits its his child but when questioned about the "extraordinary amount" of support he has been giving now say he needs a paternity test before he will put out more.
- is now mad because he is being taken to court for support & visitation and has the AUDACITY to say the ONLY reason she is doing that is to get chex outta him.


Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. But what really showed just how punk azzed, cowardly, disrespectful, ignorant and just plain full of BYTCHASSNESS he was when he thought it was okay to take his anger out on the mother of his child by putting her gov't name, blog name, place of employment and other revealing information out on the Internet for the whole fugging world to see. He tried to get back at the MOTHER OF HIS CHILD by dragging her name, her character & her livelihood through the mud like a petulant child throws a tantrum. He then compounded his despicable behavior by cussing out practically every single person that called him out for his bytchassedness. I don't care if every single thing he said about her was fact. It's not even relevant to the bytchassness he demonstrated. Not even close. It is also not relevant now that the deed is done. ALL THAT MATTERS is the care & welfare of that child that he claims is such a blessing to him.


How EXACTLY does he justify what he did?! ...


BECAUSE HE IS MAD and when a "man is attacked he fights back"? IS HE FRIGGIN SERIOUS! He feels attacked because he is getting taken to court for child support and because she is allegedly keeping him from his "precious blessing?" IS HE FOR REAL! Do what the fugg you are supposed to do and perhaps you wouldn't have this drama. How's that for an idea.


He thought the solution; the best way to fight back was to trample all over the MOTHER OF HIS CHILD'S reputation & character, threaten her job and her "ability to manage her finances" - YEAH, THAT WAS THE TICKET? GTFOOHWTBS


DUMBAZZ.

How does he plan on answering his daughters questions one day about why he called Mommy a fat garden implement and caused her trouble at work (or to even lose her job). Is THAT how we handle conflict in a "manly" and/or fatherly way. REALLY?


JACKWAGON.

I hope she prints that mess out and takes it to court to demonstrate why & how he is a threat and not worthy of unsupervised visitation. If this is the kind of stuff you say to the entire world, I'd hate to think what he would say directly to the child about the mother.


To the mother, hang in there. Head up, shoulders back. STAND. Do NOT stoop to his level of bytchassness. JUST DON'T DO IT. Just take his punkazz to court and take care of business. Take care of you and your child. Stop talking about him on & offline about anything. Give him nothing that he can twist into his warped sense of justice.


Whew, Lawd, JESUS. Made me pull my tazer out the gosh damn holster.


STOP GLOBAL BYTCHASSNESS!


-----------------------------------
UPDATE: Yeah, he finally came to his damn senses and deleting the offending post...but the damage has been done. IDJIT.

Victory is Beautiful - BEAT NAVY!

Victory IS Beautiful...yet the question remains...How do we ensure victory for the Army Team this Saturday? I am taking my answer from a recent sermon/lesson delivered by my pastor at our church from the Book of Nehemiah.

You see, Nehemiah was working on rebuilding the walls of Jerusalem while at the same time those walls were under siege. How in the world was this going to get done? A daunting task for sure. However, he knew that God would fight for them.

16 From that day on, half of my men did the work, while the other half were quipped with spears, shields, bows and armor. The officers posted themselves behind all the people of Judah 17 who were building the wall. Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other, 18 and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked. But the man who sounded the trumpet stayed with me. 19 Then I said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, "The work is extensive and spread out, and we are widely separated from each other along the wall. 20 Wherever you hear the sound of the trumpet, join us there. Our God will fight for us!

The question remained...how did they get God to fight for them? You know you gotta put in a little effort to enforce the Victory.

Three Things:
  • Show Up! - ...Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you...2Chronicles 20:17
  • Stay Ready! - Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come...Ecclesiastes 12:1
  • Be Aggressive! - ..."Put this money to work (occupy)," he said, "until I come back." Luke 19:13

Well, we can't guarantee a Victory over Navy, but we (The ARMY TEAM) CAN do those three things and fight the good fight. Doing just those three things may not capture the Heart of God, but it will capture the the faith of every heart in grey...for if the 12th man is for them, who can be against them?!

So, Army Team, when you take the field on Saturday, we - The ARMY STRONG Nation - need you to do three things for four quarters:

  • SHOW UP! - Mind, Body, Soul. Walk on the field and embrace the moment. Stay in it, no matter what, till the very last second. Mind, Body, SOUL.
  • STAY READY! - You already are, but like I said before...stay in the moment. Have your sword in you hand, the playbook in you mind, your training at the forefront...stay ready for anything in order for the miracle, the blessing, the most incredible play imaginable to manifest itself on the field.
  • BE AGGRESSIVE! - You can't have a laid back attitude. Don't assume ANYTHING. TAKE it. BRING it. GAME ON! Have that look on your face like you are ready to fight & win. Do not get punked out of building your wall.

The house is decorated, my uniform (as for 12th Man) is laid out...Let's get 'er done.

GO ARMY - BEAT NAVY
VICTORY IS BEAUTIFUL

12/7/10

Are You Ready For Some Football...PUNK!

12/6/10

SIR, There are 4 & a Butt Days Till Army-Navy

From phillylovesarmynavy.com:
When Army and Navy meet, there is no other game with deeper foundations or greater prestige.

The rivalry kicked off 120 years ago when Cadet Dennis Mahan Michie accepted a “challenge” from the Naval Academy and the two squads faced off on The Plain at West Point on November 29, 1890 (Navy had been playing organized football since 1879, and came out on top of the newly-established Army squad). Ever since, through those many years of intense cheers, unforgettable plays and climactic moments, the Army/Navy rivalry has been etched into the minds of countless fans and followers. All it takes is a visit to West Point or Annapolis, where everything (from the finely manicured hedges to the chant following grace-before-meals) proclaims “Beat Navy” or “Beat Army,” to understand how deeply ingrained this rivalry actually is.

We are not going to the game this year, but will definitly be there in 2011 when they play in Fedex Field in DC. YEAH BABY!!!! The Steptoe Clan is hosting our Annual EPIC Army-Navy Party at True Blessings Estate where we will have an indoor tailgate and watch Army Beat DA HELL outta Navy (I hope the team got a read of my Open Letter to the Army Football Team) in the warmth & comfort of the BIG SCREEN and High Def.

Hope to see you there.

GO ARMY!!!! BEAT NAVY!!!!

12/1/10

The Epic Christmas Decorating Project 2010



The Epic Christmas Decorating Project for Christmas 2010 is complete...minus the occassional light replacement and straightening the gangsta lean of the outside tree.

It IS looking a lot like Christmas.

Dear Secret (Blog) Santa 2010

I am so excited about the blogger secret Santa that Pserendipity set up again this year. I've got my fellow blogger that I am to select a gift for and have started reading their blog - combing thru the archives trying to figure out the perfect gift. Since the person I selected is completely new to me, I'm having to learn about and infer stuff just by reading. I can't interact extensively with them right now as it would kill the secret. Sigh.

I'm hoping that they post a hint over the next few days so I can be about my mad hunt (just another excuse to shop) for my interpretation of said hint.

Since I'm soliciting a hint or two, I thought I'd post a little blurb about my preference (or proclivities) to help my Secret Santa out. It is pretty much the same as last year, but I've added a few updates.


- People know me as the TravelDiva (duh). If it is related to traveling...I'm in.
- I have, on numerous occasions, been called out for my sparkly fabulousness and am easily distracted by shiny, sparkly, bedazzled things. (ie. review pictures...I always wear a brooch - the more sparkly the better, the bigger the better).
- I even bejewel my hair. Seriously. Don't judge me.
- I have a shoe fetish that is unrivaled with a closet to hold the in. DSW certificate?
- I collect odd things...snow globs & masks from ever place I've traveled. I like em big. One of either with an interesting story or from where you are from would be equally as loverly.
- You can NEVER go wrong with anything related to red wine or martini's. I'm not an alcoholic...I'm a professional drinker.
- You can't go wrong with Cigar paraphernailia. My not so secret vice.
- I'm an "elite athlete" ya know. Triathlon training stuff would be awesome (pull boy, training fins, mesh bag, misc)
- Don't tell anyone, but I love all things Bath & Body Works. SHHHHH. NO JUDGING REMEMBER.
Bottom line...if it screams DIVA, sparkles and/or is girly, I'm going to be ecstatic.

...and in actuality, any gift I receive that is from the heart and giving with as much caring & thought as I know the people involved are putting into this will be a blessing and greatly appreciated.

Thank you, Santa.

Tis The Season

I LOVE ME SOME CHRISTMAS! I've completed the Epic Christmas Decorating Project (pictures later), the Army-Navy Game is next weekend (and we are going to a BOWL GAME), The Prince will be home for the holiday's and having a 6 year old that still believes in Santa just makes it all wonderful.

I LOVE CHRISTMAS!

There are a couple of fun things out there that I thought you might enjoy and share with your families:

Portable North Pole - The Magic Lives On with Portable North Pole
Santa Claus and his amazing PNP (Portable North Pole) console will be online during the entire holiday season. With just a few clicks, this technological marvel will let your loved ones receive a personal message from Santa Claus, sent directly from his village in the North Pole. Rediscover Christmas with this immersive and unique experience that brings the holiday magic back to life

Official NORAD Santa Tracker - http://www.noradsanta.org/
All the preparations for this year are in place! Come back each day to receive updates from the North Pole and to discover new surprises in the Kids' Countdown Village. Santa’s elves have been busier than usual this year preparing. Visit Santa’s Village to see what’s been going on, and join in on the fun!



It's beginning to feel a lot like Christmas!!! Enjoy