4/29/08

Bags, Crowns & Wine...Oh My!

Bags, Crowns & Wine...Oh My!













When: Friday, May 9, 6:00PM - Until?

Friends & Family - I hope you will come out for some pre-Mother's day shopping & fellowship. We will have some awesome handbags, crowns & maybe a little jewelry for your shopping pleasure

But guess what! Don't even sweat it if you don't want to buy anything. SERIOUSLY!!!

JUST COME and meet other fabulous people, have some food & a drink or two. Just come and have a great time.I look forward to seeing you all & meeting some new friends.

P.S. This is NOT a women only thing. Bring your man/SO (especially if he has a checkbook)

If you would like to come and did not get your evite, drop me a note @ salesdiva@bww.com and I'll get you added.

Lacrosse Scouting Report

Prince Jordan's Lacrosse Scouting Report is complete. It will be updated periodically as Jordan continues to excel and grow in his chosen sport....

Jordan's Lacrosse Scouting Report can be viewed by clicking the following URL: http://www.ncsasports.org/pr.htm?clientID=18507

We Have Visitors

I have two bird feeders in the yard and I recently filled em up with apparently yummy birdseed cause we have lots of visitors lately and they are eating up a storm.

We get a whole village of finches, a couple of robins, a couple of mean, greedy bluejays and one solo cardinal. I'm never fast enough for the bluejays or the cardinal to capture them on film. I'm gonna have to lay in wait for em.

It's nice in the morning to sit with a cup of coffee and watch for my visitors to come and share breakfast.

4/26/08

4 Acres - No Mule

There are days when havin a whole bunch of yard is a whole bunch of pain in the azz. With land, big A house, a driveway that is 1/4 mile long comes MAINTENANCE. For future reference, when choosing a home, there is more than just if you can afford the note to consider. You need to find out if , in addition to the mortgage, can you afford the utilities, water & MAINTENANCE that goes along with the BIG A house. Plus you DO wanna be able to eat sometimes.

Let me give you some examples that goes with this 4 Acres with No Mule:
- Lawn mowing: Do it yourself every weekend at about 4 hours+ (industrial riding mower 6K+) OR hire a service at $70/week

- Lawn Maintenance: Weeding, Fertilizing, Edging. Spring Cleanup (remove leaves, weeding, planting & removal, new mulch (approx 70-100 bags)) - DON'T EVEN ASK or Do it yourself. Manual Labor SUCKS.

- Repave/Seal Driveway every 5+ years: Not even a question about doing it yourself. We just had to have it done and shared the cost with our neighbors. Total $3800.

- Well & Septic - clean it/condition ever 3 years. Approx. $500/service and your eyebrows will fall off from the stench every time.

- Window Washing - 30 Windows + all glass sun room. AWE HELL. I simply cringe at the thought.

There are more things (not including just maintaining the inside) but I'm exhausted just thinking about it. (Roof, well pump, caulking, appliances, just plain cleaning, whew!) Now don't get me wrong, we love our home, but there are days like today as I'm sucking down some painkiller and Ron is stinkin' up the house with B.en.Ga.y that I miss the days of a homeowners association. Out here in the country - we don't have a HOA. We have covenants, but nobody is really going around putting a sticker on your door about to fine you for have a green door vs a beige door. You can't put your car engine on blocks out here, but you can have a tractor or horse if ya wanna. N E WAY.

We spent the day cleaning up the yard. We did hire a up & coming young man who needed some quick cash to help us out today and we got to it. I unveiled the grill and scrubbed, cleaned and wiped until it was gleaming. Tested it and we are ready to go. Prolly gonna fire it up tomorrow and do some shrimp on the barbie. Ron cleared debris from the edge of "the forest" and piled up wood/kindling for the outdoor patio. We cleaned the deck, and got all the furniture ready for use (and used it). We washed down the patio furniture covers and let them dry for summer storage. Our young helper weeded and got all of the fall leaves out, trimmed all the bushes and reeds and cleaned up all the mess (put it out in "the forest") - that back acre is good for something.

We were done before the sun went down. Ate dinner on the deck and are now relaxing. Next time, I hire an entire team and work on mastering my supervisory skills.

Personal IT Department - Part 3

M.y.Spa.ce is the DEBIL, Bobby Boucher (pronounce Boo-SHAY)! That is all I got to say. So my neice comes over for the weekend and drops her laptop (that we gave her) on the table and announces that she has got some serious problems with her computer - there are all these pop up and spyware stuff on it. Oh REALLY, I say. She proceed to also inform me that it was the Spyware Blocker software that I loaded on the computer that is causing the problem.

DA HELL YOU SAY! I (not being on my meds at the moment) SNAPPED and read her the riot act. As the resident, in house, technical support team - there AINT NUTTIN that I put on her computer that has caused the serious melt down her computer was having. Well, after running her laptop and my laptop side by side, doing research on what all these pop up were, where they came from and how to get rid of them - THEY ALL CAME FROM THAT DEBIL M.y.Spa.ce. I hate that site like I hate gettin stung by a wasp. That ish pisses me off and hurts like hell.

And if you need some documentation, background info...here it is from Business Week:
Social-networking sites a 'hotbed' for spyware
Youths on M.yS.pa.ce and similar sites aren't cautious about surfing the Web

Let's just say I've been working on her computer since 6pm last night. I haved used Spy.b.ot, Ad.A.wa.re, updated her virus protection software, edited what I could find/what was obvious in her registry, tried to stop some services in her configuration and STILL this sucker persists. I have cleaned up over 250 files/registry entries & programs since last night.

It has hijacked her desktop with some insidious message in the background AND disabled her task manager so I can't even stop the malicious program from running in the background. It is now 8:30am in the morning and I'm on my last attempt at resolution before I have to send the computer out. I'm SO MAD I COULD YOU COULD FRY AN EGG ON MY HEAD! UGGGAAAAAAAAH!!!!! After narrowing down the search to which program the sucker was, I have found a program (that you can download for free) called Ma.lwa.re.bytes An.ti/Ma.lwa-re. It has been running for the past hour and it has found (so far) 30 more infected files.

My children and the rest of the kids that I finance are now BANNED from the Debil - da M.y&&###!**Space. Hell to the Naw. And if you think you are gonna do it anyway, well guess what...DON'T COME CRYING TO ME WHEN YOU PUTER IS F'D UP AGAIN. Buy yourself a new one with you OWN money OR fix it your dang self.

Hmmmph! Idjits. I'm going to Yoga and get my Chi back....as Whitley used to say..."Relax, Relate, Release."

....that program just found 4 more infected files. 'Sigh'

4/24/08

I'm LOST

I have watched this maddening show for the past 4 seasons. I haven't missed an episode....AND IT IS DRIVING ME MAD...yet I can't stop.

There is one thing about this show that I am absolutely certain of...There would not been any seasons past maybe 2 if it had been up to me cause I would have not hesitated to kill that baztard Ben. I wouldn't have hesitated NOT ONCE. The Lost People have been taken his ish for WAY too long for me. I woulda taken out as many of those crazy azz Others so long ago. Let me tell ya, I don't give a ratz azz about the secrets of the island - I figure that I'll be there long enough that I can figure that damn ish out - kinda like in the game MYST (if you've ever played that computer game). No need for them Others. All the lies, manipulation and killing - HEEEEELLLLLL. I'm justified in takin' Ben and some of dem Others out. AND tonights episode....UGGGAAAAAHH. Will somebody finally just shoot that sucker in the head and be done with it. "You need me to see Jacob and find out what we should do" WHO DA HELL is Jacob and WHY DO WE CARE. Let me tell ya... if there was a couple of black people running ish with my boy Syed & Sawyer handlin they biznezz- THE SHOW WOULD BE OVER!!! Didn't anyone tell Jack and the rest of his posse that CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT. JEEEZE.

Despite the fact that I am always jumping up and down, pacing in front of the TV, yelling - "kill the sucker, PLEASE" and getting myself all worked up over a freakin TV show, I'll be right back next week for a new episode. Obviously, I need to get a hobby.

P.S. WHY, OH WHY if you have been stuck on a island with minimal food (eating fish, coconuts and fruit all day long), running back and forth from the jungle to the beach every 5 minutes are you still 300 freakin' pounds? WHY? It just can't be. I mean, like, for real now. What is that story?

4/23/08

You Try Walking In Those Shoes....

My luck, I would have broke both my ankles. I was impressed with the way she played not just once but twice falling down. While I felt for her a bit, I did chuckle a little (okay, a lot). Poor Girl...she did get back up and kept struttin'. Had me LMAO!

4/20/08

Weekend With Friends

Our Friends, the Pollhein's, came down for the weekend to attend a family event on today. We spent all day Saturday just hanging out and relaxing. Actually, Terri and I relaxed while we watched the men folk try out/demo a new product that Joe is consulting on (and has the exclusive rights to market on the East Coast) - Mongoose Wax. All I can say is that the men looked great while waxing the car and it was even better when we finally convinced Joe (Ron was being whiny cause he was doing manual labor) to take off his shirt while working. He needs some sun BAAAAADDD.


Terri and I started the day by going to a Bikram Yoga Class (aka - Hot Yoga). It was so hard for me to stay focused while watching Terri's face the whole time. I just had to stop watching. Terri constantly had this look of "WTF, these heffa's are CRAZY, how da hell am I supposed to do that." The instructor even asked her if she was okay cause her face was all sqwinched up and Terri said that "It's just the wheeble effect. I'm round and wheebles wobble." She had us dying up in there. We finished the class and went back to the house. Ron and Joe were getting ready to being the wax on, wax off demo. You are supposed to be able to put this Mongoose wax on the car and not need to redo it for almost a year. Terri and I took up residence outside and watched the men folk wax the car. After a little heckling, Joe finally took his shirt off so we could have a better show. Ron was focused and pouting so he refused. He did (later that night) lift his shirt up to show us his 3 pack (at least he has a pack).

They finished Ron's Hummer and it looked FANTASTIC. I have never seen a shine/gleem on a car like that except for maybe when it first comes off the lot. Beautiful. Ron was sold. He did Erin's car and she rolled up this morning and was like "I can get this in a bunch of dealerships, this stuff is great. It has poured down rain and my car is still gleaming like new." I think we have a market for the stuff.

The Pollhein's went off to visit their relatives for a few hours while I prepared for an outdoor dinner & roastin marshmallows. We ordered some sushi and ate on the grass patio and then I built a fire in the outdoor fireplace and we made S'mores. Enclosed for your viewing pleasure is my instructional video on making S'mores....



We had a great day.

4/18/08

Self-Censorship

I got a call this morning (7am) from one of my bestest friends who's council I trust implicitly. She didn't even say hello, but started with "Girl, you gotta get up and clean that post from last night up." I sit up and am like "WHAAAAAAT? (all innocent like). Why. What I do?"

My girl tells me that my blog is not even about "that" mess - that "all the cursing was extra"...and you know, in general, she is right. I rarely ever have a full blown DIVA RANT here. I usually am all happy go lucky, sharing my adventures and all the good, fun stuff that goes on with me, my family and friends. I never (or very rarely) share some of the God awful, depressing, bad, negative stuff that actually does happen or the horrendous stuff that people say or do to me. When I do, I discuss it in the abstract or I may mention something all reflective and what not and move on to the good stuff. Only those closest to me may know that something is going on with me and they usually call me up and ask "Are you okay? I sensed from your post that something was wrong." They are usually right. I just don't really talk about it here in blog land.

HOWEVER, there are times that I just get SICK AND TIRED of being SICK AND TIRED. I get weary of self-censoring what I really am thinking or feeling. I get sick and tired of people thinking they can just do or say what ever they want to me and that I won't roll up on them and call them out. I get tired and weary of self-censoring myself at work all in the name of "Emotional Intelligence". I get tired and weary of self-censoring myself out in public so as to not get shanked by someone for bringing their ignant behavior to their attention. I get tired and weary of just pacing around my kitchen, ranting at the world about some injustice, pouring a glass of wine.

I am especially tired of people behaving badly, saying ignant stuff, backstabbing, sabotaging, just plain HATING and thinking that because I am generally a decent, polite person that I'm not gonna say or do something about it. OR people think that because I have tough skin and know that I can drop, shoot, and roll - that nothing will phase me or make me cry. WRONG.

I will admit that I snapped last night. A lot went down last night and I am not going to speak on all of it. I snapped and needed to vent. I NEEDED to get it out. I wrote down exactly what I was thinking - VERBATIM. Yep, I curse a lot in my head. I am polite (mostly) out loud. This (my blog) is the very place for me to have a full blown hissy fit...and I even censored the hissy fit to protect the guilty. There is no way for anyone to know who the individual(s) I was speaking of unless you were there and saw everything go down or heard the whole story personally from me or from someone involved. If you think I'm talking about you...then own your mess...you know the truth of the matter...and if your feelings are hurt (the only thing that you should be upset about is that I cursed you)- too bad. The truth will set you free.

I will own my words & curses and not edit the post. Like I said at the end of the last post "It is what it is. I am what I am."

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

4/17/08

Passive Aggressive People

Passive Aggressive People. I absolutely loath them. I suffer their predilections (to smile in your face all the while undermining your very existence) POORLY! They are the very people who don't have the balls or internal fortitude to say to your face what they think or want to say. If they have a problem with you, instead of trying to have a civilized conversation with you about it, they tell your boss/another mutual "friend"/family member about your alleged "heinous" behavior and try to convince/coerce that person into taking action against you.

Usually you hear about the PA person's ignant, weak , gutless azz accusations from the party they snitched to. At that point, I just want to run up to the offender and OPEN PALM SLAP the shyat outta em.

Listen here you weak azz, pathetic, passive aggressive beyatches! STOP THE BYATCHAZZNEZZ!!!!! If you gotta problem with me, then call me up, meet me for coffee - WHATEVER and let's discuss it. DAMN. We are grown freakin women. ACT LIKE IT. PUNK AZZ.

The only way anyone would know that I was speaking about you would be if you said something about it. WHICH YOUR PUNK CRY BABY AZZ DID! All that snitchen did was show that you actually DID do the ignant azz behavior that I wrote about. If you had said NOTHING, then NOBODY - not even the person you told on me to - would have know that you had been schooled. STOOOPIT.

So, what your problem is - is that I wrote about your stoopit behavior, not that you refused to comply with what was requested, not that you actually acted like an azz. IDJIT.

WHAT THE F EVER. GET A PAIR. If you want me to apologize for something I talked about here then make DAMN sure that you didn't actually do the stoopit ish that I discussed. Otherwise, what I said about it stands. It is what it is. You are what you are.

UGAAAAAAH! I hate passive aggressive people.

4/16/08

Heir to the Empire

My son, Jordan, got his team pictures back yesterday. Doesn't he look like the handsome future King of the Steptoe Empire - Prince Jordan.
Don't tell him I said this. He already walks around with a swole head, flexing his guns with "about to be" a senior itis. Ugaaaaah. Shhhhh...I do like the idea that I am the Mother to the Prince, though.

America's Future Top Model

Look at my beautiful mini-Diva. She is definitly ready for her close-up. What a beauty.

4/15/08

New Piece of Exercise Equipment

ROTFL - I gotta have me one of these for my office.

http://phatfabulous.blogspot.com/2008/04/new-piece-of-gotta-have-exercise.html

Stop the Madness.

Mom's Day Off

My oldest, Erin, gave Ron and I a day off this past Saturday by taking Cara and Charlee to the Aquarium.


It was wonderful. I slept in till 8am, took a "Hot Yoga" Class, got my nails done and hung out with my neighbors on the lawn patio sharing wine & cheese. What a great day.

4/13/08

Hello World, It's Me Lisa

Apparently I missed National DeLurking Week (Jan 8-12). RutRow. I'll admit that I have been known to lurk around several blog sites. Often times, its because I want to get around to visit as many as time will allow reading fun and interesting stuff and I just don't stop to make time to comment. I've gotten much better this past year and have outed (de-lurked) myself with places that I visit a lot.

Well, I'd love to meet some of the visitors here. From my little map, I know that I have a lot of visitors from places far and wide, but I rarely hear hide nor hair from anyone. HELLLLOOOOO OUT THERE. Ya know, I read somewhere that in cyberspace, no one can hear you read. Ya gotta click the comment button.

So, if you got a minute. Hit the comment button and give me your name/alias, where your from, how'd you find me and any other comment you like to leave. I look forward to meeting you.

4/11/08

Italy 2008

My girlfriend from the ATL asked me if I would join her in Europe for a little excursion in Italy. She is going to be in Turkey for a work related thing and decided that if she was going to be over that way, she should visit somewhere else to. She didn't want to hang by herself - SOOOOOO, who do you call when you want to travel with flair & fun: THE TRAVEL DIVA! Who else.

So we are off to Italy in June. We are going to Rome first with a side trip to either Venice, Florence or Palermo. Final details have not been ironed out yet but since I have my non-stop flight to Rome booked and reservations at the W.es.tin Ex.cels.ior Rome (I LOVE THAT HOTEL) taken care of, I guess we gotta go.

I took my mother to Italy in 2005 for her 60th birthday. We had a blast. This was before I even thought about blogging but was really doing it anyway. I emailed (yes, I had my computer with me - I don't go nowhere without it) a daily report of our adventures to my friends & family list. I kept those emails and put it together in an newsletter for my scrapbook (yeah, I do that too - gotta have memories). If you would like to read about me and mi madres adventures - click here


I also put together a video slide show of our adventure. If you want to see some beautiful pictures, watch the video at this link -
http://salesdiva.neptune.com?selectedalbum=salesdiva172502

I think you will enjoy it.

4/8/08

What My Ma Said

Death & Life - http://sandysprogress.blogspot.com/2008/04/death-and-life.html

4/6/08

Matron of Honor Duties - THE WEDDING!

This was the most beautiful and classy weddings I have ever been to and it was my absolute pleasure and honor to have been a participant. I am so happy for my BFF! She was beautiful & radiant as every bride should be. They looked so happy. We had an awesome time at the wedding & reception. Enclosed are a few pictures from the glorious day....

Matron of Honor Duties - Rehersal & Dinner



The rehearsal went off without a hitch and we had a great dinner at O.liv.es across the street from the St. Re.gi.s. The food was fantastic. After dinner, we decided to go back to the hotel and hang out in the lobby bar. In the interest of maximizing our (Val's Dad's money actually) money, we decided to gather up all of the open bottles of wine and take them back to the hotel with us. Good thing I had my Bride Crisis Management Bag with me to squirrel our loot away in. We think the waiter was padding the bill, cause there were a lot of bottles open - why not just finish a bottle before opening 4 more. Interesting. No matter - they went to great use.

We thought for a moment that we were busted cause outside were police and an ambulance. Not for us thought. We scurry across the street back to the St. Re.gis with the loot and take over a good half of the lobby. I asked the waiter to bring us some glasses for the wine and he says that he is going to have to charge us $35/bottle for a corkage fee. Obviously he needed his meds adjusted cause there ain't NO WAY IN HELL I was gonna pay that for what was already opened. We didn't need it uncorked, we just needed glasses. I told him to get the manager and he looked miserable but when to get him. As we were gathering a pretty nice crowd and getting loud, we decided to take the party up to Val's suite. The waiter comes back all sad boo boo kitty like and says the manager will be right out. I told him "Never mind, we are going up to the suite." He immediately perks up grabs the tray of glasses and the snacks he brought out and helped us to the elevator. He was so relieved that we were leaving his lobby all nice and peaceful and I wasn't going to get into it with the manager.

Up in Val's suite we just hung out, drank all the wine up, ate all of her food that had be delivered to her room and had a good time. I did have to almost beat down a few people to get them out of the bedroom portion of her room (where her dress was being kept). Some busybodies were just very busy and needed to get a little snatched.

Anyway, we hung out until about 1am and then had to go nite nite. The Big Day was upon us.

4/4/08

Matron of Honor Duties - Let The Festivities Begin

This is the big weekend for my BFF Val. Tonight is the rehersal, rehersal dinner and Bachelor/Bachelorett Get-Together. I'm ready for action! Above is my bride crisis management bag with everything an Attendant to the Bride would need in case of crisis. I have tissue, gum, mints, neck pillow (we have to drive tomorrow to get hair done) and soothing eye cover, travel toothbrush & toothpaste, the brides favorite snack & beverages, nail file, camera & more. READY FOR ACTION.

This morning we put together gift bags for the people staying at the hotel (St. Regis) and I went to get my hair done. Minor setback when I arrived at the St. Regis...the hotel reservation is in hubby's name. Ron is arriving later. They were not going to let me check in cause my name was not on the reservation. I almost snapped right there but regained my composure and got Ron on the phone. I don't know what he told the woman but she got off the phone, looked up at me and said "Welcome to the St. Regis." Uh Huh. Don't make me go postal up in here.

Gotta get dressed for the rehersal. Later!