Graduation Day

The Sweetest Days

The Sweetest Days - From Birth to Graduation - a video montage tribute to my son, Prince Jordan.


Happy Memorial Day

My prayers & heartfelt thanks to all the men & women who are currently serving our country THANK YOU & GOD BLESS to those who made the ultimate sacrifice to keep this country the home of the free & the land of the brave. Be Thou At Peace.


Romancing The Stone

I took The FireMarshall to The Pearl Modern Spa & Boutique for his birthday today and we enjoyed the Romancing the Stone Pearl Package - a romantic get away featuring a Hawaiian Rapture Hot Stone Massage for two followed by a dip in the hydroterapy tub accompanied by chocolate covered strawberries & champagne (Killer of Joy had sparkling cider - sigh). It was very relaxing and a good time was had by the birthday boy.

Ladies Hat & Tea Party

Yesterday, I attended a tea & hat party at the Mandarin Oriental in Washington, DC with some of the most wonderful and beautiful women on the planet...of course, I'm biased. CreoleInDC put it all together and we all met up in our afternoon tea finery. Turns out that we really didn't have tea...it ended up more like a Hat & Cocktail Party. We just a bunch of lushes anyway.

It was so fun to get all dressed up - very girly, girl of us all. I haven't spent this much time putting together an ensemble in a long time and I loved every minute of it. From picking out my hat, finding flowers to dress it up, to selecting shoes and jewelry...just a bunch of good ole fashioned girl fun.

Yep. Yep.

I have to admit that I was not impressed AT ALL with Tea Service at the Mandarin. That was a whole lot of money for poor service and a very untraditional tea. I'll stick with the formal & traditional tea at The Ritz or The Four Seasons. If CreoleInDC had not gotten up to make a plate of the standard sweets & sandwiches, I would have sat there for-damn-ever waiting for them to bring out my stand of said goodies. They never bothered to come over and ask what type of tea you would like, no individual tea pots w/warmers & cozies like at The Ritz. You just pick a dag on tea bag and they poured some hot water on it. Ummm...NO. Ya'll know I'm a snob, right...well, if you are going to advertise it as High Tea, then you damn well better serve it like a high tea. The Mandarin needs to go over and get some lessons. Look it up.

What the Mandarin had going on was an overpriced buffet of desserts with a side of stinginess with the tea sandwiches & a dollop of attitude. The overworked server even had the nerve to say, when asked if we could get some more to the tea sandwiches, "The chef told me not to come back and ask for anymore." DA HELL. For $35 friggin dollars, you better be back there whippin up as many damn sandwiches as we can eat.

What the Mandarin did not serve up, the company I was with did. Funny, beautiful, engaging...tell it like it is sisters who are comfortable telling it and strong enough to handle the truth if asked for an opinion. My kind of women. CreoleInDC even brought hostess gifts for everyone - a lovely decorated jar of bath teas that smell just heavenly and I can't wait to use in my tub. Just LOVERLY!

After we killed another 4 hours telling stories and laughing it up, a few of us came over to my house - a couple of the men folk joined us - where we cut up until about 11pm. I laughed so hard last night, I thought I was gonna need a kidney transplant. Barbara's man was ABSOLUTELY HILARIOUS - but when VaughnKendrick (I don't even know if that is how you spell it, but we all said it very dramatical like every time) told the story of how Barbara put him on a sales quota for the "Classroom Store" he runs in a business class he teaches and was pimping him out/shaking him down for her cut of the profits...I just died. D.E.A.D. A scream!

And let me tell you, these heffa's put down not one, but TWO pitchers of Pama Margarita's. "Ummm, Lisa, you gonna make another one." Let me get right on it. It was a blast.

A great day all around.


Prince Jordan takes Princess Camille to her Senior Prom



- If you say "You Know" over 120 times in 40 minutes during a speech, then it is time to take a Toastmaster course or something. NO, I DON'T KNOW.

- If (as a guy) you have to adjust your package every time you move - and publicly- then it is time to switch from boxers to briefs. Seriously.

- If your legs look like cottage cheese and are streaked with blue veins, then shorts really should not be an option.

- On the same lines...If the shorts you are wearing create a triangle shape (45degree angles from crotch to outside thigh) when you stand, then your shorts are too small or your too big. PICK ONE and choose slacks.

- If you are wearing a white skirt/pants, then gain an understanding that you DO NOT wear jet black or pristine white undergarments. WE CAN SEE THEM. Nude or as close to skin tone as possible works. P.S. Use a mirror.

- If you are over 21, then you should NOT be shopping in Forever21 for just about anything except a shell, tshirt or belt. It should not be your career wardrobe shopping haven.

- If you dress like a hooker, pierce your tongue or other parts of your body visible to the general public, die your hair 5 colors, tat your body where everyone can see it, then DO NOT be surprised when the majority of people make a summary judgement about you that is not favorable. I don't make the rules.

- If you walk the walk, then expect people to talk the talk...about YOU.

- If you are in the public spotlight and make politically charged statements regarding your beliefs, then have the backbone to stand your ground and defend your beliefs. They are, of course, yours, right? Crying, complaining and turning yourself into a victim for your beliefs is for pussies.

- If (as a woman) you have a good man who is "perfect" in every way but the deal breaker is you can't say his pet name during the "big finale" & you can't discuss something else you can say, then expect to be single (or not have some good sans ropas) for a long time. HUMPH. Hey Big Poppa!

- If you have been a career criminal & sociopath all of your life and your sister has had to raise almost all of your children, then don't FRIGGIN CALL ON MOTHER'S DAY SCREAMING, CURSING & CRYING cause "your" kids didn't call YOU for Mother's Day. ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

If...Then... I'm just saying.

Goalie Action Shots


Random Ramblings

* I mentioned to my girlfriend Terri that I was considering container gardening. This woman sends off a book on Square Foot Gardening and a set of 6 glass lanterns for my yard. I love my friends.

* I'm still "considering"...lot of work for a girl who kill plants on sight.

* The new movie "Star Trek" was fan-fuggin-tastic. PERIOD. I was born in the wrong century cause I damn sure would have gone where no one has gone before...although I certainly would have pee'd myself doing a halo jump from a shuttle craft on to a platform about the size of a swimming pool. FO SHO.

* I love this quote and try to live it : Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders & says - "Oh crap...she's awake!!"

* Question: Go a week in advance to babysit dogs so they can get used to you before you need to actually dog sit OR come to your grandson's graduation? Is it really that hard to decide? Seriously.

* My sister had the audacity to call up her mother & children she housed in her "rent a womb" for nine months crying, screaming, cursing (and then hanging up on) for not calling her to wish her a Happy Mother's Day. AS IF. Erin, being her, told my sister "I have already wished my mother a Happy Mother's Day". My sister called Erin & Charlee ungrateful and hungup. STOP THE MADNESS.

* Sometimes I hate family SOOOOOOO friggin much.

* Liquor make some people think that they are grown, pay all da bills, can make the rules and can say what they want, when they want. Ummmm...NO!

* I went to an event last Friday that I just didn't feel like going to, but knew it needed to be done. Turns out I was in the right place, at the right time.

* When Opportunity knocks...are you prepared (have you been preparing) or have you been on the sidelines whining about how nothing good ever happens to you? Hmmmmm....

* I'm having a 24 Season Finale Watch Party. What was that?....you gotta go to work or some ish...DEN STAY YO AZZ HOME! Jeeze. Betcha if it was happening at the club, you'd go. WHATEVA. Some people make me tired.

* People do what they want to do. DO IT THEN. You don't need to give a bunch of excuses. "No" is an acceptable and sufficient answer.

* Getting the Ponderosa Graduation ready is no small feat. I finally painted a wall that I had repaired like over a year ago. Somethings ya'll just gonna have to talk about me about.

* I pulling together pictures of Jordan from birth to today to make a video slide show to present at the Graduation Party. I've got some body work to do. Alas.

* Imma need people to review my post on "Internet Intelligence" and apply it to their lives. There is no need for all this drama ON THE FRIGGIN INTERNET.

* My BFF Soror's son got a track scholarship to college. We are both now pouring ourselves a cocktail, plopping down on the couch, and exhaling big time...we dodged that college tuition bullet. Thank you, Jesus!

* It weirds me out when random people follow me on Twitter...I mean SOOOOOO friggin random, there is no rhyme or reason to what would make them follow little ole me. Creepy.

* I unfriended a person on FB yesterday cause I was SICK & DAMN TIRED of his updates that lamented, bashed or criticized an alleged woman he dated/loved - WHO KNOWS. I was tired of the drivel, bye bye. I didn't know him anyway.

* I also learned some new stuff on FB on how to limit, hide, and keep people out of my instant message box...sometimes there is just TOO much communication. TMI is not overrated.

* I have been procrastinating on going to the grocery store all day...but I have that perogative.

So, what is Rambling about it your head?


Happy Mother's Day

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No Shyat, Sherlock

I have been talking about common sense regarding the "Swine"/H1N1 virus for days now. Like I have said before, 36,000 people die each year in the U.S. and they don't close schools for weeks on end. But what do I know. Obviously, the CDC finally updated their "guidance" with some common damn sense. I've added my comments for effect...

Update on (H1N1) Virus

Parents and Guardians,

At 2:00pm today, the Center for Disease Control and Prevention provided updated guidance for schools and childcare facilities regarding the prevention of the spread of the H1N1 flu virus.

Most U.S. cases of the H1N1 flu have been comparable to seasonal influenza. [GTFOOH! Really, NO SYAT!]

At this time, CDC recommends the primary means to reduce spread of influenza in schools focus on early identification of ill students and staff, staying home when ill, and good cough and hand hygiene etiquette. [ie. Wipe your hind parts = wash you damn hands, Do something nasty with your hands = wash your damn hands; SERIOUSLY] Decisions about school closure should be at the discretion of local authorities based on local considerations, including public concern and the impact of school absenteeism and staffing shortages.


School closure is not advised for a suspected or confirmed case of H1N1 flu and, in general, is not advised unless the amount of absenteeism interferes with the school’s ability to function.
Schools that were closed based on previous interim CDC guidance related to this outbreak may reopen. [That's right, get yo azz back to work and in school.]

Students, faculty or staff with influenza-like illness (fever with a cough or sore throat) should stay home and not attend school or go into the community except to seek medical care for at least 7 days even if symptoms resolve sooner. [NO SHYAT, SHERLOCK]

Students, faculty and staff who are still sick 7 days after they become ill should continue to stay home from school until at least 24 hours after symptoms have resolved. [Like, DUH]

Students, faculty and staff who appear to have an influenza-like illness at arrival or become ill during the school day should be isolated promptly in a room separate from other students and sent home. [Good friggin idea, huh. Might should be standard operating procedure. I'm just saying.]

Parents and guardians should monitor their school-aged children, and faculty and staff should self-monitor every morning for symptoms of influenza-like illness. [Really?]

Ill students should not attend alternative childcare or congregate in settings other than school.
[You mean I gotta care for my OWN children when sick? WTF? Isn't that why I pay those child care people. DA HELL was I thinking.]

Schools can help serve as a focus for educational activities [ CAN HELP? WTF. Isn't educational activities their primary friggin purpose. SERIOUSLY] aimed at promoting ways to reduce the spread of influenza, including hand hygiene and cough etiquette. [ie. Wipe your hind parts = wash you damn hands, Do something nasty with your hands = wash your damn hands; SERIOUSLY]

Students, faculty and staff should continue to follow good hygiene etiquette to prevent the spread of colds and other communicable diseases. [One last time, NO SHAYT!]

CDC and local and state health officials will continue to closely monitor the severity and spread of the H1N1 influenza.

I'm just saying....


Random Whys?

Inquiring minds want to know...

- Why do really large (size 18+) women - usually the plus size girls under the age of 25 - think that wearing low rise jeans with butt floss panties is cute. WHY? It is just nasty for the rest of us to look at the crack of your azz with this floss straining to hold on. WHY?

- Why does my son's room look like a natural disaster hit and the debris is still there months later? WHY?

- Why do I feel like I need hazmat gear just to retrieve the movie rental from his room. I'm talking full gear with O2 tank and all.

- Why did I find all of my forks in his room...and a couple of knives, spoons and assorted glassware. WHY?

- Why do people have no problem dropping $60+ at a happy hour that will advance their career or job search goals not ONE IOTA, but will whine, snivel, complain and come up with fity-eleven excuses as to why they can't come up with $15 for a networking career event that hiring managers are attending?

- Why do those same people keep asking ME to help them find a job (when it is convenient for them). DA HELL.

- Why are we losing our minds about the Swine Flu? 36K people die each year of the regular ole flu (that does also mutate each year - that's why there is a new vaccine each year - duh!) and we don't close schools & cancel ish?

- Why don't people just practice good hygiene year round?

- Why do people only wash their hands frequently when there is an imminent pandemic? Any other time...pee & leave? WHY - you nasty baztards.

- Why are there so many nasty people in the world?

- Why am I generally irritated today?

- Why do people take some anonymous, random stuff that people (or I) say here in Internet land so friggin personal, like we was talking about YOU (yeah, I am pointing at you) specifically? WHY? I'll tell you why. Cause, guess what, you either did, believe, think, act - WHATEVER - they way we was talking about. The truth will set you free.

- Why, Oh Lord, Why? ....For they know NOT what they do.