photo 1 photo 2

  • - Metro Smart Pass – $10/day …approx $200/month
  • - Metro Parking – $5/day – $100/month
  • - Groceries to pack lunch (so he can eat in the “Marshall Break Room” – BOOYAAAH!) – $$ – who knows, that boy can EAT
  • - Gma Willie insisting on a new wardrobe to include 2 new suits, shirts, ties, slacks, dress shoes, cuff links, sunglasses & more – $$$$ (I don’t EVEN want to know)

photo 3

Internship with the US Marshall Service – PRICELESS!!


Dreams DO come true! Make a plan. Work the plan.

We are SOOOOO proud of The Prince
Heir to the Empire, Protector of the Realm


The Meltdown


I knew it was coming. It was bound to happen. It started with accepting a new position that required 3 weeks of home study with exams & certifications that you had to pass if you wanted to keep said job.


No pressure.


It was followed by 16 days out of 21 with out of town travel that also included study, exams & certifications. Around day 3 of a five day launch meeting in Dallas, I lost my glasses (even after putting them on a GOT-DANG chain around my fuggin neck). One minute they are there, the next time I reach for them all I get is chain.


Slight hissy fit ensues. I chalk it up to exhaustion, order up some wine and try to calm my nerves.


Then I had the GI Jane run, but I didn’t feel all that pressed about it. Just chalked it up to adventure.


After 18 hours of practicing our “verbalizations” I pass my presentation certification with flying colors (as if there was gonna be any doubt) and then we have the rest of the day of meetings & more meetings.


At 5pm last Thursday, we finally wrap up and have an hour before dinner & some closing ceremony concert. I tell myself that I’m just gonna go to my room, lay across the bed and rest my eyes before going back to the mandatory fun/socializing. I woke up at 9pm having missed the whole damn shindig. Oh well.


Friday, we have district meetings and then HOME! Not so much. Severe storms are rolling in and peoples phones start going off notifying them that their flight was cancelled. My eye started to twitch. I couldn’t focus on a damn thing the manager was saying. All I could do was check & recheck my flight. If I didn’t get home THAT NIGHT, I was gonna blow. I could feel it.


Long story short…two delays, sitting at the gate for an hour, we took off at 10pm and I landed at BWI at 2:30am…A.M. EXHAUSTED.


I hung out on Saturday, did some yard work, went out with some friends/classmates – I did have a wonderful time – and then drove up to Philly to get a swim workout with Team Diva. I thought I was feeling great. I was motivated even, but the meltdown must have been right under the surface. I got home from an awesome swim and it was utter chaos & pandemonium. My niece, home from college & moved back in, was having a pity party cause she felt like we were treating her like a guest cause I couldn’t knock down a wall to make room for all of her furniture in her room. SERIOUSLY. Then I found out that my sisters boo had “borrowed” my niece’s car, used all the gas and didn’t fill it back up…and that somehow was MY PROBLEM to resolve.


My nerves were going bad quickly. I snapped at the cat.


Today was my first day in the field launching a new product and on my first MOTHER FUGGING CALL…THAT DAMN COMPUTER FAILS AND I CAN’T CAPTURE A SIGNATURE ON THE DAMN THING. 40 min on the phone with the “help” center (an oxymoron of epic proportions). NO HELP. I managed using a different system the rest of the day. Sigh. At the end of the day, I stop at the grocery store to get grub for the fam and stock up for kids when we are out of town this weekend.


And I slam the keys to the car in the trunk of the car.


*cue up the ugly cry* Let the meltdown begin.


All I could do was put my hands on the trunk (covering my groceries) and cry. I WAS DONE! Stick a fork in me. I called Ron and he calmly arranged for a Pop-a-Lock.I stood there in the parking lot of my local G.iant & silently sobbed. I just couldn’t turn the waterworks off. I was exhausted. I was worn out. That was just the last straw of a series of events over the past month. The volcano erupted.


I walked across the street to the Ruby Tuesday, tears still flowing because for some reason I couldn’t get them to stop and asked if the bar was open. They looked worried. 2 side cars & 50 minutes later, I had managed to get myself back together, regroup, calm the fugg down and I was back in my car on my way home.


We are all entitled to a meltdown every now and then. I calm right now, posted up on my chaise, The FireMarshall catering to me and making me comfy. He is handling the dishes, the laundry, Cara’s homework & bath. And yet I’m sitting here feeling a little guilty cause I just don’t have it in me to do something I said I would and I want to cancel…but I gave my word. SIGH. I’m need a rest break and I’m going to get and TAKE it this weekend. We are off for some R&R at The Breakers and I’m gonna get it in. The it will be back to ACHIEVING EXCELLENCE!


Anybody had a meltdown lately? What did you do to get over the lava?


GI Jane Running

Getting in a good run while on a business trip in a city that you are NOT EVEN REMOTELY familiar with is, well…CHALLENGING. Remember this run in Nashville? Yeah. That.


Well, tonight I was all like ambitious and ish and decided that I would run on this trail ALLEDGEDLY near my hotel. I look up the a map of the trail and realize – AH! an entrance is only about a mile away. I memorize the map – yeah, a skill I picked up as a Quartermaster Officer, you gotta know where to go and steal pick up those supplies – and I was off.


I decided to do a jog/walk to the park as I had to get to this entrance via one of those damn side highways in Dallas – like WTF – and I wanted to avoid the dreaded HWR (hit while running). Now, during my research on this trail, this is the picture I was greeted with:


All nicely paved. Friendly looking. Welcoming. Ahhh! The joy of running. UH HUH.

Not so much.


I managed to find the park…not via the entrance that was on the map in my head, but by looking it up again on my phone and stumbling up on it via a side street. Ok. I get on the path and start off. Ummmm, What?


Underpass. Mkay. I'mma give those two vagrants guys sitting/leaning on the concrete underpass thingy a wide berth. I run past as they whistle and say something in Spanish. No biggie, they didn’t budge from their spot and I was past and gone before they could.


I keep running and I’m thinking to my self…Where da hell is that pretty picture you see above, cause this is what I am really seeing:


This picture actually doesn’t do what I was seeing justice. I just couldn’t bring myself to stop and take a picture. I felt like I was running into some scene from Deliverance. Lots of “woods” creeping up onto the “path” if you want to call it that. Lots of make shift bridges to get over the not so aromatic stream running along the path, lots of trash and more. I went around one bend, ran across this bridge and was about to go around another bend when I realized – FUG THAT – I can’t see what’s around that corner, it’s starting to get dark, I’m running alone in the woods of a city I don’t know. SHIIIIITTTT! I’m turning my azz around. I make an abrupt u-turn and notice that there are “PEOPLE” living under the bridge I just crossed.


I’m DONE. All I can think about is I’m going to have to fight my way outta the city wilderness.


And that turned out to be pretty damn close to the truth.


I picked up the pace and decided to run back the way I came and make a bee-line to what I THOUGHT was the end of the trail that would put me back on the road leading to my hotel.




I run to the end of the trail and it runs dead smack into a wall with a fence in front of it. Hell. It turns out that this was to be a “proposed” crossing and it must have been still in the thinking about it phase. Well, since when did a fence stop me. I figure I jump the fence and I’ll be on the road that leads back to the hotel. I climb the fence all like GI Jane and good thing I decided to peek over instead of just vaulting over cause I would have either landed on top of a car or been run-ded over. The plan must have been for a tunnel in the future cause I would have jumped right over that fence onto the freeway.


I go back a ways and start walking through a parking lot. Surely this must take me out to the street.




It starts taking me all the way back the way I came. Ummm…getting dark…must do something. I start running again. I come across a staircase that LOOKS like it leads up to this hospital. Good place to get killed near. I bound up the stairs. DEAD END. Another fence. I’m not EVEN going there this time. I walk along the fence for a while, going right back to the point I started at, find another trail down –into the woods but I can see street & CARS! - and FINALLY I am out into civilization. I had to climb a hill so I could try and see my hotel (which is 28 stories) and get my bearings. I see the top of the hotel off in the distance and start jogging in that general direction.


I make it back to my hotel safe and sound. Famished. Thirsty. I think I did about a 10K orienteering course trying to get da hell out of that fugging trail/park.


The moral/lesson to the running adventure…I’d rather run the city streets and play dodge a car, dodge a bus before ever trying to take on Freddie Kruger again.


Oh, and you ask – why don’t you just use a treadmill? Ever go to a meeting with 3000 people (the majority that actually workout cause we all are in healthcare and we see death & mayhem & don’t wanna take any of the shyt we sell) and try and get one of the 2-3 treadmills in the hotel. NOT HAPPENING. I run outside or I don’t workout at all and THAT is just NOT an option.


Besides, where is the fun in running to nowhere?


Cheers to the Freakin’ Weekend!



Next to “It’s SO FLUFFY!!!!” This here song by Rihanna says it all about how I feel about the weekend. YES!


Cheers to the freakin weekend
I drink to that, yeah yeah
Oh let the jameson sink in
I drink to that, yeah yeah
Don't let the bastards get ya down
Turn it around with another round
There's a party at the bar everybody putcha glasses up and I drink to that
I drink to thaaaaaaaat.


National Fitness Month Giveaway WINNER


…And through a highly scientific method…(I wrote the few of you that actually commented/followed/tweeted on a slip of paper, 1 slip for each time you did what you were supposed to do and then let Princess Cara pick a chad slip out of the magic box)….the WINNER IS….


NYLSE from Life After Death of A Big Brother (Deep reading…you should take a look). WOO HOO! Please send your gov’t name and mailing address to me at wpdiva87@clear.net and I will get your wearable speakers to you asap.


Congratulations! Now go forth and BE FIT!


Why I Tri...

...because THERE IS NO CAN'T!


Mother’s Day Grins & Giggles: Peasant Man Triathlon

Just for grins and giggles (and training purposes), I participated in the Peasant Man Triathlon with Becca on Mother’s Day..and we had a blast. We drove out to Lake Anna State Park in Spotsylvania, VA East Jablip, VA the night before to partake in the Peasant Man Bonfire & Pre-race BBQ.

                  marshmallo smores


Turns out that the Bonfire Virgin Sacrifice was cancelled. Turns out that "the virgin was a born again virgin and would not appease the gods” – actually, “they” wanted to charge $500 for the wood and wouldn’t let us burn at the beach. I was really disappointed because I brought a big bag of “Campfire” Sized Marshmallows. However, I couldn’t let those marshmallows & chocolate graham crackers go to waste. Becca and I posted up to a grill and started making everyone (that wanted one) S’mores. Good Times. We left the lake at about 9pm to make the 20min trek back to our posh hotel campground accommodations –- anytime the door to my hotel room is exposed to outside elements, the hotel doesn’t require a CC for incidentals and/or the walls to the bathtub look like they just couldn’t get all the blood from the last murder off, I consider THAT camping—so we could get some shut eye for the race.


Mother’s Day! Becca and I get up to partake in the complimentary breakfast served at our “campground”. I scarfed down some hard boiled eggs & a waffle & COFFEE!!! Becaa…I can’t remember. Then we were off back to the lake to set up our stuff in the transition area.

             timingchip  transition


  I know. It looks like chaos. I straightened it up. Don’t worry. I knew something was wrong when I got my wet suit on and I could barely breath. I also couldn’t rotate my arms. Guess my wetsuit was too tight (uh huh). I found out on this swim that unless the water is 60 degrees or less (and I’m not signing up for a race in frozen water) then I’m not EVER swimming with a wetsuit on. I just can’t…and I’m simply NOT going to invest in another wetsuit. I swim just fine without it. HATE THEM. I got enough blubber to keep me warm (I look just like a seal in my tri suit and why I also freaked out about the shark in the Potomac) and my own built in flotation devices to survive most open water swims. Might get me a Rash Guard to wear over my tri suit just for some protection, but that will be the extent of it. Just might use that $10 coupon to SportsAuthority to get that Rash Guard too! HUMPH. THUMBS DOWN on the WET SUIT.

DSC02086 DSC02087


And speaking of race packet goodies…I’m going to get me a RoadID ($5 off coupon on race bib – its in my bag somewhere) and maybe try out those compression sleeves – COUPON!! Good stuff! The race was fun, a good training exercise. I was really glad I did it to see where I was at for 6 weeks out to the Philly Sprint Triathlon. I completed this one in  2:04. The distances were a little off (not by much) but I’m thinking with 6 weeks of training to go, I can do the Philly Sprint in under 2:10/2:20. YES I CAN!


Oh, and by the way…not only do Black Girls Run…Black Girls Tri too!


The finish line was a real treat as they called out your name as you came down the hill and gave encouragement. You were greeted at the finish with cupcakes from Georgetown Cupcakes and with a souvenir glass. You were then hustled off to a BBQ that was slammin’ or I was just ravenous.

beccafinish2                   cupcakes gift2

I have to warn ya’ll. This stuff is addicting. I hear rumor that my BFF Ms. Pattey is taking swim lessons and looking at bikes in preparation to do a Sprint Tri on Labor Day Weekend. I’m not saying anything…I’m just sayin’.


How ‘bout a Threesome – swim, bike, run?


So, what did you do for Mother’s Day? I hope you had an awesome weekend.


National Fitness Month Giveaway!


May is National Physical Fitness and Sports Month. WOO HOO! Most days are a fitness milestone for me and I HAVE to get it in just to keep Uniqua (my fat alter ego) at bay – especially since I seem to have absolutely no self control for anything else but submitting myself to pain & suffering. I must like it. I must, right?


N.E.WAY. I thought I would celebrate with all of my lurkers readers by sponsoring MY very own giveaway. Yes, fitness fans, this one is all on me. The prize was purchased by yours truly, The TravelDiva…who for the Month of May shall be known as The FitnessDiva!


Here’s what’s up for grabs:


Your very own pair of personal wearable speakers from SafeSound  Sports. Ya’ll remember me talking about the wearable speakers that I got to wear while running in races where you can’t wear headphones or on my bike (on these windy country roads out here, you HAVE to be able to hear your surroundings). Well, I had another version on order that came in after I got the others so, I’m going to share these with a lucky “Elite” Athlete. (Did you get off the couch? You’re elite)


So to win your very own Personal Wearable Speakers here is what you have to do…you get one entry for EACH thing you do:

  • Leave me a comment HERE ON THIS BLOG and tell me what you are doing/starting/planning to do this month to step up your fitness game (one entry)
  • Tweet this and let me know you did by either including @thetraveldiva in your tweet so I see it or telling me in a comment HERE ON THIS BLOG that you tweeted. (one entry)
  • Follow Me using one of the follow methods (Networked Blogs, Google Friend Connect or FeedBliz Subscription) and let me know you did it (one entry)

You can get up to 3 entries. GO FOR IT.


I’ll get you started…here is what’s on deck for May/June for the FitnessDiva:

May 8th – PeasantMan Triathlon (training triathlon)

May 21st – Warrior Dash

May 22nd – BE GREAT with NinteenSixtyNine as we Just Keep Swimming. (I’m going up to Philly to torture her, Muuuwaaahaahaahaa!…Just kidding)

June 5th – Annapolis 10K

June 11th – Washington DC Tri Open Water Swim Practice

June 26th – Philly Sprint Triathlon


Won’t you join me?


What College Tuition Will Get You

If my son & his roommate can put on a mini production then I'm expecting that they ACE those final exams. LOL. Not bad. I really enjoyed the bloopers.

The Prince and Sir Tony are just up to no good in the Realm. SIGH.

Training Torture Tidbits


I spent that past 10 days in Minnesot-AH! at a training class for a new gig I took (taking it for the Kingdom – playing my position to ensure that Camelot is still lined in Gold & Silver). The only saving grace was The Mall of America where I spent the entire Saturday (9 hours) shopping with my new friend & playmate, Nat from Montana. I LURVE that girl. We hit it off famously. Go figure. Without here, there might have been a “goin’ postal” moment.



- I found it amazing that sales reps with so much experience and tenure were wigging out over taking a product certification exam…ESPECIALLY when the trainer gave us a study guide and was telling us exactly what was on the exam to review. o_O


- I so wanted to pass out my Xanax.


- Just cause you WERE formerly a District Manager does NOT make you the resident expert of EVERY SINGLE THING. Keywords: FORMERLY. You are just like the rest of us…and old dog put out to pasture given an opportunity to excel elsewhere.


- STOP TYRING TO BE TOP TRAINING REP! None of us really care nor are we competing for the title. Seriously.


- If you already know that question you are asking is off label, not indicated or out of compliance…THEN DON’T FUGGING ASK THE TRAINER THE DAG ON QUESTION. She can’t answer it. You are wasting time.


- Also, stop beating that dead horse to death.


- Perhaps I will bring some Xanax down and spike the coffee. The hysteria is killing me.


- Looking over the top of my glasses with THAT look…brings me immense joy. I see why it has been so effective for The FireMarshall.


- I’m gonna need this woman who just had a baby; whose husband told her NOT to go back to work to stop all the whining and complaining and slow her roll. Go home.


- You insisted on taking this job against your husbands wishes so SUCK it up. I don’t want to hear anymore about your stress level, how much you miss your baby (I miss my grown children, dammit) or anything else when you were given the opportunity to stay at home.


- OH! You went back cause you didn’t want to “fall” behind in your skills. Sigh. Let this old lady tell you…you will regret NOT staying home with your kids if you financially can way more than you will ever regret falling behind your “corporate” peers in skills. Trust me.


- Wanna know how to tell when your skirt is too short – for professional/business duty ?…When your 40+ years old, you sit down and your thigh high hose shows to the entire room. Chile Please! Cottage Cheese don’t look chexy no matter HOW skinny you are. PERIOD.


- WORST TRAINER EVER!!! If you don’t know who to use all the features of the damn tablet or where shit is, what makes you think we will. FUBAR!


- By day 9, my “give a shyt factor” was at ZERO! I just didn’t give a damn.


- Passed the exam, razzle dazzled them with my presentation skills (as I knew I would – it just ain’t that hard) and went to Off Fifth Saks and shopped to get The FireMarshall new duds for our trip to The Breakers. That’s how much time I had to kill before we had to be back for grins, giggles & goodbyes.


- I practically knocked people out of the way and did the OJ Simpson to the bus and in the airport to get da hell outta there.


There is NO PLACE like HOME!


Swimmin' With the Fishes

Foamy says it all.

Ding Dong
Bin Laden's dead
The Terrorist
Bin Laden's Dead

Ding Dong
The Terrorist is DEAD