Facebook-Conformity & Groupthink

I just finished my first prerequisite course – Fundamentals in Psychology – with an A+ I might add, and some of the concepts that we discussed in the class came to mind when I logged into the Book of the Face.

 

What I noticed was that Fac.e.book would make a great closed environment for a scientific social psychology study of conformity and groupthink.

 

Conformity – the act of yielding to social pressure; of matching attitudes, beliefs and behaviors to the group norm.

 

Groupthink – a phenomenon that occurs in groups where the desire for conformity; for consensus results in incorrect decision making or loss of ability for critical evaluation. The pressure to conform prevents debate; eliminates critical thinking.

 

FA.CE.BOOK = GROUPTHINK …A LOT and heaven forbid you are a non-conformist and/or actually apply critical thinking to a subject…more often than not you will be driven from that discussion, beat down, denigrated, insulted, blocked, unfriended. Happens all the time. If you don’t see it – perhaps you have succumbed to groupthink. You might just be conforming to the group.

 

Think about it. Do you just watch what others post – yeah, those opinionated post that get under your skin, that just make one-sided point without any discussion and also offer no solutions because you don’t want to rock the boat; make your friend mad; offer a solution that may raise the ire of said friend?

 

Do you just click like or add you affirmative comment; cosigning that picture/opinion/political piece without offering any context?

 

Do you enter into the discussion in the affirmative and then when someone else offers a dissenting opinion you jump down that persons throat with name calling, shade slinging and condescending quips in order to show how dumb and out of step with “mainstream” thinking that person is?

 

Have you ever been in the midst of an interesting yet heated debate on FB and just sat idly by saying NOT A DAMN THING in the thread while someone debating outside of  thought “norms” gets thrashed, but then contact them privately to commiserate? OH YEAH! I’ve seen that one. Heaven forbid you go against the thread norm and publicly come to the defense of the outlier. INTERESTING.

 

I didn’t have words to put to the phenomenon until after taking this class, debating with my classmates and watching videos of the results from some studies on conformity & obedience. Interesting stuff. Food for thought.

 

So…what say you? Can you see the groupthink and conformist nature of FB?

Inauguration Celebration Weekend

What a great weekend!

My girlfriend, MsPattey came in town and, as usual, we were ripping and running from the moment she got off the plane embarking on our adventure. I picked her up at the airport and we headed straight for the metro to go downtown to the Official Inauguration Souvenir Store. We bought some buttons, a great set of highball glasses and some other doodads; however, they were running some serious inauguration extortion in the “official” store. There were plenty of of stands and shops around with much more reasonable prices to partake in…especially if you wanted a bobble head of any President you could think of.

                     

The next day we spent the day at Pentagon City Mall and, well, let’s say, some bargains were found and dollars were spent. I haven’t shopped like that in FOREVER! It was a blast. We shopped for so long that we damn near passed out from lack of sustenance ending up at Harry’s in the mall where we proceed to eat like savages. Not a word was said as we consumed inhaled our burgers. Not one word.

 

Sunday morning we had brunch at National Harbor – my BloodyMary was AWESOME and shopped some more. Later that evening, we went to a Pre-Inauguration Party at the Navy Yard. Another fabulous time with friends and we even got to meet James Cotton, Tuskegee Airman who had recently received a Tuskegee Airmen Congressional Gold Medal. What a treat!

      

Monday morning came around real fast and it was time to head down to the Inauguration ceremony. Tickets in hand, we boarded the metro and headed downtown to make our way to the Gold Ticket holder security checkpoint. It was just amazing how many people simply did NOT read the back of their ticket which said in big letters what your could and could not bring into the security area. Somebody got a huge donation of chairs, coolers, backpacks and a host of other items that were CLEARLY marked prohibited.

 

READING IS FUNDAMENTAL.

 

Getting through our checkpoint was like being in a heard of sheep, but went pretty smoothly and quickly. We were in the gold section by 9:30am and then it was a hurry up and wait situation. We kept ourselves busy taking pictures, talking to people and taking in the scenery – the pomp & circumstance of the day.

                   

This was the first inauguration I had ever been to. Pretty damn neat. Watching on the TV is warm and all, but actually being there – a much more tangible, emotional moment. I was glad I was part of the experience; glad to be sharing it with my girlfriend.

 

While the getting in was pretty easy, the getting out and back to the metro station was a whole different story. It took us an hour to get 2 blocks. From 3rd & C to D street and the Federal Center Metro. The line at the metro was unbelievable! We decided to walk back to L’Enfant Plaza station and when we got there, the line/crowd was even larger and not moving. Apparently, the station was closed for reasons were not privy to. (Found out later that it was temporarily shut down due to overcrowding) Melt down time…both MsPattey and I only had about 10% power on our phones and we needed to find the closest metro stop that might be open. We ended up walking from L’Enfant Plaza to the Waterfront metro (about 10 LONG AZZ blocks) and we were on our way back home.

 

By time we got back to the house – EXHAUSTED – we had barely enough time to get ready and back on the metro to go to the Ambassadors Ball.

               

We weren’t the only people in all their black tie finery on the Metro and we weren’t the only ladies wearing a pair of fold up ballet slippers (or just plain slippers) to walk from the Metro to the Convention Center or Carnegie Library. It was wonderful seeing all of “the beautiful” people out and about in all their finery – Imma need some people to wear a damn coat – and to mix and mingle. We saw Miss USA and Miss Teen USA at the Ambassadors Ball along with a bunch of other dignitaries from all over the world…didn’t know not a near one, but who cares. It was a Ball!

 

Another TravelDiva & HandiHOTness Adventure!!!

Girls Gone Wild–Inauguration 2013 Edition

Gird your loins, sports fans. The HandyHOTness team is about to embark on another adventure. My Top Mafia BFF MsPattey is coming to town courtesy of a Christmas Gift of an airline ticket to attend the inauguration festivities from her son. It was so cool when he contacted me and asked if I thought she would like that as a gift.

 

Stop…really. OF COURSE! And once the plans were finalized I got busy putting together ANOTHER GIRLS GONE WILD ADVENTURE!

 

We have certainly been on a bunch of them together over the past 25 years…The NYC Weekend where I got the side eye of death from the security guard for treating the “art” at MOMA like furniture…well, it WAS furniture; how was I to know that I wasn’t supposed to open the doors or sit on it. The Hilton Head Trip where we went jet skiing and to this day we still refer to what glee looks like as what we looked like on those jet ski’s.Then there was the Las Vegas Trip where we rode out to the Grand Canyon and then took a helicopter ride back into Vegas…and I just HAD to touch all the buttons and dials – MsPattey thought I was gonna kill her for sure. The Cancun Mexico Trip and the vague memories of the Party Tour – vague cause we were shit faced…I think.

I walk around my house and look at the signed Annie Lee that we got on a girlfriend weekend to Chicago – where we hunted down her gallery – I get goose bumps. A lifetime of memories.

 

We are about to embark on another adventure to add to all these wonderful memories AND I CAN’T WAIT. Stay tuned as GIRLS GONE WILD – 2013 INAUGURATION EDITION unfolds. Souvenir shopping, Mall Shopping, Lunch, Brunch, A Gala, The Ambassadors Ball and tickets to the Inauguration has the making of some great stories & great times!

Blazing Belezza Nera

As you recall, I must have been a real good girl last year, as Santa Baby brought me a brand new race bike for Christmas.

 

She was a beauty! I was so excited and she even came with a high speed fitting called RETUL. I was stoked.

 

I hauled her over to the bike shop the first opportunity I had after Christmas and as soon as I walked in the door of Race Pace, one of the technicians said, “We are going to have to exchange that bike out for you. It’s WAAAAYY to big. Looking at you, you shouldn’t be on anything bigger than about a 47cm.”

 

I was clutching a 54cm. Lip trembling. My Dominique Diva was a 52cm. But, but…

 

The technicians started pulling out other Trek’s at 47cm and 49cm, put me on a trainer and well, yeah, the 47cm fit like a glove actually.

 

“Who fit you for your current bike?”, the man asked. All I could do was give that doe eyed look cause see, what had happened was, see, I was broke and bought the cheapest bike I could above Dicks & ToysRUs (Introducing Dominque Diva Dawes) and see, like I just kinda went with that chart online and then put it together myself and then like only had a seat adjustment…

 

Bike Man - “Tsk, tsk, tsk. Been having some trouble and challenging rides, huh?” 

Me - “Yeah, well I made it do what it do and TODAY is a NEW DAY, NEW BIKE.

BM – “That it is, let’s find you the right one for you.”

 

WOO HOO!! GO ME!

 

We settled on the 2013 Trek Madone 3.1 WSD – I have named her Blazing Bellezza Nera (Blazing Black Beauty).

And she is definitely a beauty and for the price point and what I want to do – blazing fast for me. It took about a week for her to come in and I immediately went over to Race Pace to get my custom RETUL fitting. RETUL is a “state-of-the-art motion 3Dcapture bike fit system” and I thought it was awesome! The gentleman who did my fitting was also a paramedic and he actually took a look at hip alignment, checked to see if one leg/arm was longer than the other and several other measurements before hooking me up to the 3D capture system as those things would have to be compensated for in order to have a proper fit.

    

         

It took almost 2 hours of spinning with the monitors on me to get all the measurements/angles down to the mm. I was served gatorade and kept pedaling, stopping, adjusting till he – and I – was satisfied.

 

He gave it over the bike mechanics to make sure everything was tightened down and aligned and I took her home.

 

Blazing Bellezza and me! I have only had her out on the rode once since I brought her home. TIP – read the manual before hand so you know how to change the gears before you are on a road with traffic or a hill. It helps…just sayin.

 

Compared to Diva Dawes, Bellezza is LIGHTER – significantly. Faster. The saddle fits like a glove and the pressure I used to feel is gone. My girl parts are thankful. I was able to climb in a mid range gear whereas on my old bike I HAD to get into the lowest gear or I was going to stroke out …or fall over. So far, I’m in love. I still have lots of work to do – a new bike does not make me an instant podium candidate – but she sure is gonna be helpful in getting closer to some PR’s. I want to take her out on the BWI/B&A Trail where I won’t run into so much traffic to see what I can really do on her. Time will tell.

 

I highly recommend that you get a complete and extensive bike fit. Even if you don’t get a new bike, take the one you have and get measured and fitted. It will make the world of difference.

 

Stay tuned for this year’s adventure of the Traveling Diva and Blazing Bellezza Nera.

Just Random–Thoughts Happen

Happy New Year! A lot has happened in these first 10+ days of the new year at True Blessings. WHEW! I could probably write a post about each unique event but time has been limited. I’m going to just share some of the things that have popped into my head…Just Random Stuff :

 

• I got a promotion at work and the 1st day was Jan 2nd. We had a year beginning meeting this week where I met everyone in my region and in my district team. SIGH
• There definitely are NOT any diversity goals in my region since I was the only person of any color out of 53 people.
• The was a goal for achieving the most khaki or bad blond highlights – it was reached.
• The amount of information I’m having to learn is EXACTLY like drinking from a fire hose.
• Toledo, OH for a training class in Feb? SERIOUSLY?
• I went to an Vision Board Party last Saturday and it was a wonderful experience. I took it rather seriously and was amazed at how random pictures, phrases and items that I only picked because they struck a cord with me came together to create my 2013 Vision. What were some of my take always?
• The ladies I shared this experience with were all awesome!
• My vision is MY Vision for ME. Everybody had great, interesting things they wanted to achieve and that was great for them. My board was about me.
• I can’t wait for the “gathering” at the end of this year to see how much of our Visions have manifested. I know they will.
• I started the first of several perquisites I need to get accepted into a Physician Assistant/Masters in Public Health program. January 2nd was a very eventful day. Promotion & School.
• I’m THAT old lady that sits in the front row of class with her hand dandy notebook, pen & highlighters – taking copious notes.
• We spent the 1st hour of class with an icebreaker where you had to tell your name, why you’re in class and something unique. REALLY?
• Major is communication, yet you mumble?
• There is ALWAYS the perky kid in class that always has a story, raises their hand and says pick me!
• Only interesting person in class is the girl who is a Junior in HS graduating early trying to find out what she wants to do with her life.
• …then there is the DC cop majoring in nursing cause she hates being a cop.
• So far, I have a 97.7% in the class. I be smart.
• I can’t wait to ride my new bike. I brought her home from an awesome fitting on Monday. The plan is to take her out on Sunday. Now I just got to name him/her.

• All those gun position meme’s people are posting…I find it amusing, and JUST DUMB, that so many people have such an absolute opinion/position defending the need to keep every single weapon on the planet, but NEVER have a position or solution on how to keep it all and yet make it harder for wacko’s to get them. I see.
• God don’t like ugly. That mess, that snark, the negative that you do behind the scenes will eventually catch up to you. Do better, please.
• I realizing that something(s) are going to have to give to keep family, work, school, tri-training going. TV is it. That’s what a DVR/TIVO is for.

 

• I Dreamed a Dream…and they will come true.

The Adventures of Molly Chicklet–Elf On The Shelf

2012 was our first year participating in this fun Christmas adventure with our Elf On The Shelf Scout. It turned into a very serious look into the psychological warfare that can be done on an 8 year old that BELIEVES there is a Santa and NOTHING you can tell her will sway her for that belief.

Princess Cara is all bout Santa Clause. She knows we get her presents too, but Santa always brings her stuff too. This year, we introduced Elf on the Shelf and from the moment we read the book and named our scout (which gives her her magic to get back & forth from the North Pole to your house), Princess Cara was all about it and (obviously) I had BETTER be about my job too.

 

Our Scout Elf was named Molly Chicklet  and from that moment, just looking at that face and mischievous side eye, I knew I had best be a tad creative. Not “bad elf” creative – that is not how I wanted PC to see Molly Chicklet – just good ole fashioned fun. All was well until I had to go out of town for a training class and The EOTS Daddy-gate debacle, where Molly Chicklet appeared to get violated by one of our cats and was found laid out on the kitchen floor. HYSTERIA!!! Molly had lost her magic - SOB; Santa wasn’t going to come – WAIL; CALL MOMMIE – she’ll get Santa to understand. 911 call from the FireMarshall and I had to, on my feet, come up with a restoration of Molly Chicklets Magic plan. I had to make a “call” to Santa to get instructions and then Skype back with the plan of action…all before the school bus came.

 

Jesus be a fence.

 

I was able to convince PC that the plan (put Molly back in her box, sprinkle cinnamon & sugar over the box while saying her name 3x, put her back in the first place we set her – mantle place and all would be set right) would work and she got on the school bus satisfied that all was right in the world again.

 

WHEW CHILE! However, the FireMarshall was a BIG FAT FAIL and I had to supervise from New Orleans EVERY.SINGLE.DAY till my return. SIGH.

 

Christmas Eve was Molly’s last day with us. She fly’s back to the North Pole on Christmas Eve until next Christmas time. Princess Cara woke up to find a note from Molly Chicklet and Santa (who ate all the pizza we left out – Santa is sick of all those damn cookies and want some real food) and the absolute joy and excitement on her face was PRICELESS!

 

So, here are some of the Adventures of Molly Chicklet…

                 

                     

 

                

Did y’all know about this Elf on the Shelf business? Did you get an Elf Scout for your family this year? I hope you had as much fun as we did.

 

MERRY CHRISTMAS

A Living Doll Making Dolls–Overcoming Adversity w/Dignity

I saw Ariel’s story on the news Saturday morning – Teen Uses Talent to Try to Overcome Obstacles – and that young lady’s resilience in such a tough situation (she has an inoperable cancerous brain tumor, her dad has prostate & bladder cancer, her mom has lupus & diabetes, her brother has autism) struck a nerve.

iCANT not help some way. I can get me one of those dolls.

 

Ariel started making custom dolls to help support her family. I went to the Women’s Industrial Exchange to see her dolls Saturday afternoon and they are more than dolls, they are works of art, just like they said in the news report. I decided I had to have one to help support her.

 

Ariel had sold out of the 50 dolls she had already made! She had made $3000 in a day and was now taking orders. Custom orders. Give her a theme and she will make something for you. I, of course, requested a TriGirl/Fitness Guru theme. I can’t wait to see what she comes up with.

 

Just loved it…and The Women’s Industrial Exchange…what a wonderful place. Since the late 1800’s, the exchange has been helping women in need earn a living discretely. Today, The Exchange continues to serve its non-profit mission as an outlet of hand-crafted goods made by women and men intent on supporting themselves with dignity.

 

If you are looking for quality handcrafted gifts  - Shop Local – Shop Green – then you might just want to check out The Exchange. You will have to call the shop if you want to order a doll as Ariel’s website and links in the online store are not up yet. They were not prepared for the wonderful response, but are diligently working to get it up and running.  Don’t want a doll? She is also accepting material/fabric, old clothing, props- large doll furniture, buttons, hair (put that bad weave hair and raggedy wig to good use) to keep the cost of making the dolls down yet able to use most of the profit to help her family. Box it up and send it to the shop c/o Ariel – The Living Doll or drop it off.

 

My prayers are with Ariel and her entire family.

Not So Wordless Wednesday

Three days of training have led to this...death by sticky notes, highlighters and PowerPoint. The exam is tomorrow. I'm going out to Drago's for some Oysters...da hell with it.

Foto Friday

All we could do was cry & pray as we watched the horrific tragedy unfold in CT. All those babies killed ~random, senseless.

...and we hugged our baby oh so tight.

Living Our Marriage Like It’s Golden

                 

                                  June 6,1987                      June 9, 2012

 

A friend of mine recently wrote an interesting article entitled – The Death of the Golden Anniversary. He made some good points. People are getting married older and life expectancy – well – isn’t as long, especially for the black male (DO BETTER – LIVE LONGER). Most people of this generation and going forward just aren’t going to make it to 50 years of marriage.

 

The FireMarshall and I are the Last of the Married Forever Mohicans. We are an anomaly. We got married young. Ten days after graduation from West Point. I was 21, he was 22. We didn’t get married for the historical reasons mentioned in the article: “to secure economic stability and to procreate". Nope. We actually married each other for “Love and Happiness”. We loved each other and we figured out the money, career, procreation along the way or rather, as we grew up together.

              1983                                    1987                             2007

 

Are we old souls? I don’t know. We often hear the trials & tribulations of our single, as well as married friends and raise an eyebrow ~ it just ain’t that serious. Pick your battles ~ win the war.

 

We made it to our Silver Anniversary this past June. Has it been tough? HELL TO THE YEAH! We have been to the mountain top, cast down into the valley, walked our 40 years in the wilderness, climbed back up and so on and so forth. Just like an ECG. Riding that QRS wave like the rollercoaster of life. Anything else is a flat line…and DEAD.

I firmly believe we will make it to our Golden Anniversary, God willing. {FM better start moving dat ass} You see, after all that we have been through, I can’t imagine ANYTHING/ANYONE that would separate us.

 

Besides, it’s cheaper to love me at this point.

 

I hope that our lives, our marriage is an example of what love & commitment look like and can be. For my author friend is correct – “After all, it’s not about reaching 50 years of marriage just to say you did. It’s about living the life one has with one’s spouse like it’s golden.”