Travel Drama–Episode 29


I swear on all that is Holy that there HAS to be a Travel Demon between BWI & Ft.Wayne, IN. HAS TO BE. It seems that every time The Prince, Heir to the Empire, Protector of the Realm tries to come home or go back to college, there is some form or TRAVEL DRAMA involved in any of the journey to or fro.


Today started off innocent enough. Prince Jordan & his First Knight, Sir Tony enjoyed a week of Spring Break at True Blessing Estate. For an entire week, they got run of the Kingdom under the watchful eye  of Emperor FireMarshall & Empress TravelDiva (more TheTravelDiva since the FM is actually a KOJ – Killer of Joy). After the week of festivities & “socials” every night, they boarded a plane back to Indiana.


The United flight left BWI at 1212pm…but didn’t touch down in Chicago. You see, there was this “act of nature” called a rain & lightening storm. So the United Flight from BWI to Chicago Ohare landed in Indianapolis, IN instead to wait out the storm.  That flight sat on the runway in INDIANA for 2 hours waiting out the storm, never went to a gate, took off and went back to Ohare. SERIOUSLY?  The Prince & Sir Tony got in the line with the rest of humanity to reschedule their flight. I KNEW that if The Empress didn’t intercede, those boys wouldn’t get back to college until before next weekend Parents Weekend. I got on the phone with United & they quickly booked The Prince & Sir Tony on the next flight out…the only flight out on any airline to Ft. Wayne…until 6 am THE NEXT MORNING.


So…what are they supposed to do until 5am the next morning? I work on finding them lodging. I find a very reasonable rate at a hotel called Baymont Inn & Suites Ohare/Elk Village. Well, let me tell ya – YOU GET WHAT YOU PAY FOR. I made the reservation on an online travel site and went about my business. The Prince & Sir Tony get to the hotel and THOSE SUMBYOTCHES at the Baymont Inn & Suites Ohare put them back on the street saying that there was a “law” in Elk Village stating that it was illegal to house any person under the age of 21. SERIOUSLY. ARE YOU FUGGING KIDDING ME. So if a 20 year old SOLDIER, SEAMAN, MARINE 20 years old or less that is SERVING their country and protecting your right to even own a MFn’ hotel could stay at your piece of shit in the woods. GTFOOHWTBS. Law my ass.


But put them out on the street they did. Told ME – The EMPRESS – that it wasn’t personal, it was the law. UH HUH. Wanna see one of the 4 horses of the apocalypse? That was me. On a rampage. I called in some Woop Ass Supply Ships for lands as far as TX & FL and become my campaign of rendering you’re the BAYMONT INN & SUITES OHARE’s reputation to dust…and I haven’t finished. I will make it my personal MISSION to get on every travel sight known to man and render a review that would make Atilla the Hun look like a nice guy. LAW MY AZZ.


While Prince Jordan & Sir Tony were riding on the shuttle back & forth from the airport and the piece of shyat hotel, The Emperor got on the phone with Starwood and secured a reservation at the Four Points Sheraton Ohare where all they requested was a signed release authorizing what charges we would allow The Prince & Sir Tony to put on our bill. Ms. Anna at the Four Points Sheraton Ohare took care of the young men, got them settled and whatnot like the professional I have always met & expected from a Starwood Property.


I still wait with baited breath to see that they actually get out of Ohare. May God grant our young men Travel Mercies and get them back to college without any more incident. Thank you for granting us the wisdom and patience to find a solution & the strength to deal with irrational, rude & disrespectful organizations with force & authority. I am thankful for all of your blessings.


I’ll keep you posted.