What's a Mother's Day without Drama

I guess it is wishful thinking that we could go one weekend without drama and intrigue. Well, no such luck.

1. My step-brother from my father's second marriage (don't even ask cause it is one hell of a long story) calls Friday night to say his wife's brother (his wife is from Thailand) died and that he needs a loan of "about" $5k to get there and to cover incidentals while there. Now I'm all about helping family...I'm not about giving loans. If you don't have it, can't get it from the bank, don't have enough credit (or are maxed) to get it from your credit cards and your own mama won't give it to you - then what makes you think I should loan you some money. What is my guarantee that I'm gonna get my money back? None. So, I'm of the philosophy that if I have it to give, then I'll give only what I won't miss. I don't want to have to hunt you down, get into fights, ruin family events cause I'm looking to get my money back...and don't get it twisted...I'd be lookin to get it back and lickity split. The Steptoe's don't play when it comes to money.

Ron once had an acquaintance ask for $4k to cover a mortgage payment or his house would
go into foreclosure. Ron asked him what he had to offer as collateral if he was going to loan
him money...DAMN. We did not loan him the money.

Well, after discussing the situation with my honey, we we going to give $1000. Okay, he'll call us on Saturday to organize a bank transfer, but he still wants to pay us back - doesn't want to fell obligated. Yep. Well, he call at 4pm on Saturday to see if I can make a transfer...he got another friend to put the airline tickets on a credit card...he just need money to cover "incidentals" while they are in Thailand for two weeks. HUH? I am unable to do the transfer online and the banks are closed. I'm not hip to using Western Union since they want almost 10%+ fee to transfer money. So, alas, no money exchanges hands. Things got a little dicey in my mind when he offered another option... he will get his mom to give him the money, if I will write a check and send to her to cover it until he gets back when he can get a loan from his job. Why would I do that? Why don't you just get the money from your mother and pay HER back when you get back and can get a loan from your job? It immediately sounded fishy to me...meaning I probably wasn't going to get my money back. The wire transfer didn't work out, banks were closed, no western union and I'm not mailing no check to anyone. He'll call me when he figures something out. It's Sunday 6:00pm. Haven't head anything...guess I get to keep my moola.

2. My niece is at the mall hanging with some girl and they get tagged for shoplifting at JC Penney. A stupid $12 shirt that was also on clearance. PAALEEESE. Can you get any more stupid. If you gonna steal something, then go ahead and DO THE DAMN THING! She calls her mother (since you gotta call a parent) - the one from the "It Would Just Be Easier" blogs - who in turn calls us to ask us what we can do to help. Well, her heroin using father showed up to pick her up. Now she has to go to some kind of hearing and she has been banned from JC Penney for a year. Today is her birthday and we were planning a party for her next weekend. Party cancelled. We were going to get her a new cell phone. Current service suspended for 90 days.

And this is her second time round this corner. Guess she might end up a chip off the ole block unless she makes some serious course corrections.

3. My sister calls again during the shoplifting crisis and wants to discuss something serious. Okay...she wants to know if in 2-3 years I would consider adopting Cara. Honey, we already got paperwork in place for that. Done deal. Laura starts to have a hissy fit saying she thought we only had temporary custody. GET A FREAKIN GRIP. I tell her that READING IS FREAKIN FUNDAMENTAL. I paid $125 to have every set of papers served to her. If she chose not to read them, understand them, or show up for court dates....then too dag-on bad for you. I've got paper, Cara (to my occasional chagrin) belongs to me. So then my sister asks me if I would at least consider keeping Cara's alleged father's last name or hypenating it. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You didn't see fit to put her alleged father's name on her birth certificate - what makes you think I'm gonna keep it at all. NO. It will be Cara Steptoe. PERIOD. Laura then asks me if we can at least let bio-dad know of our intentions. GIVE ME A BREAK. Has another village lost their idiot. HELL NO! I'm not explaining a damn thing to a man who doesn't give a rats ass about his daughter (no visits, no money, no calls, no nothing). Let him figure the mess out himself. READ THE COURT PAPERS you were served. The both of them get on my mf'n nerves.

4. Today, we get a call from my sisters 60+ year old, skinny, 3 tooth sugar daddy who lives at the roadside motel (I wouldn't let my worst enemy spend the night there). He claims that he gave $100 of his rent money to Laura 'cause she said my mother would give it back to her and he wanted to know if my mom could bring it by. DUMMY. HELL NAW! If you were dumb enough to give a $100 to a known theif and liar, then that's yo mess. Don't come lookin to us for that. You on your own, bubba.

And to top this off...come to find out that my sister is on the run. There is a warrent out for her arrest AGAIN...for what, I don't know. Probably some kind of violation of parole. Bound to have a return trip to to the pokey.

Just another day at the Steptoe's - We ARE Drama.


  1. Okay...WOW! That is a whole lot for ONE day...and you are still sane? :)

  2. Some how I missed this whole bit...guess I was overwhelmed by the tummy tuck thing...Wow! Kinda makes me glad none of my relatives speak to me. LOL! LOL!
    We love you guys!