I am in Ocean City acting as the Den Mother to 15 18year old kids that just graduated from high school. Senior Week will be the death of me.
This is my second year at this...and I know why no other parent wanted to do the duty. It wasn't cause of work or whatnot. They just didn't want to see and deal with all these teens.
Fortunately, I can be equally the Nice Lady & that Crazy MF'n Lady you don't want to fugg with.
I love overhearing the kids say, "Don't fugg wit Ms. Steptoe, ya know she was in the Army and shyt. She'll fugg you up."
Damn Skippy.
I have been contributing to the deliquency of minors though. So shoot me.
Youth is wasted on the young. WASTED.
It amazes me how many young kids, especially girls, don't have a mother that will speak da truff to their face. Why did I have "church" up in here with some random girls and they were eating it up and asking questions like it was 1st time knowledge.
SMH. Gather round, girls, gather round.
I'm falling in love with some of the young men that are here. Young, yet respectful. Yes, Ma'am. Please. Let me get that for you, Ms. Steptoe. The young men are doing all the cleaning and keeping things straight. I am duly impressed. Some of these boys have been raised right.
Or, they have the fear of Ms. Steptoe in 'em.
I had to "Kirk Out" (new term?) tonight when the PO-LICE showed up taking about keeping it down. I went da hell off. And I mean like Bl.air Wit.ch friggin crazy off. I told them that if they couldn't keep it down then the party would be turned into a friggin (and I used the real curse word) boot camp and I'd be body slammin mofo's like they was my personal PT byatch. I'd make the Ar.my S.tro.ng look like pussies.
Maaaaannnnn. They calmed down PDQ. The riff raff left.
BTW...I did 25 clicker board pushups to the shock and awe of my charges at the Ar.my St.ron.g traveling show, got me my t-shirt and then flew an Apache in the simulator. HUMPH. I still got it.
I may be short. I may be plump...but I'm FIT FINE...and modest. Something that can not be said of 98% of the teens here in OC and several of the women of a certain age hanging here this week.
I'm just gonna say NO to the women over 40/50 with cellulite & vericose veins. Just cause your are thin does NOT mean it is okay to wear that bikini and let us see your sagging skin, veins and cellulite. It's nasty. You ARE NOT cute. AT ALL.
I'm just saying.
IlaGator and the Queen Mother are joining me here tomorrow. Now this should be fun.
