10/21/10

No Way Out? No Options?

I don't think I've ever believed that I had no options; no way out of a situation. I've never been in a place in my life where I would let other people abuse me, diminish my worth, de-value me and/or use me like their personal byatch because I felt that I had no way out - no other options - no where else to go.

That is the situation the girl who is the not only the Nanny but also the Personal Assistant Byotch to the Executive Director at the little start up I am was working at feels she is in. It is just a sad state of affairs...

...and after hearing her story and working with this girl for over 4 months, I am so pissed off about the situation I could spit nails. I have spent every evening after the convention we were working at last week listening, coaching & trying to give some moral support to this young lady who fought back tears trying to figure out how she was going to make it (both mentally & financially) if things keep going as they are. I was so fired up that it became a mini-mission to help her back onto a track where she isn't being used like a "Hebrew slave" of old - making bricks with only the straw she cleaved from the fields during off hours. HUMPH!

I told (via Twitter) the story about the alleged "actress/model" the company hired to work as a "floor girl" for the booth. Her job was to pass out brochures and get doctors to come to the booth. Well, she got to Chicago and when she found out that she would have a roommate and that the room was not ready upon her arrival - she up and quit. Re-booked her flight for the next morning and rolled out stating "I'm an actress & model and I don't room with other people." Whatever. Girl Bye. I got this 2 bathroom suite all to myself.

Not so fast. The HR person had this itty bitty room (you couldn't have the bathroom door open at same time as closet or main door) and asked if her roommate could move to my suite. Being the nice lady that I am not, I said sure. So, that is how I ended up rooming with the Executive Directors Personal Assistant Byotch (PAB).

PAB moves in and during our honeymoon (get to know ya) period, I find out that this chick is 22 years old with a son and a triflin' baby daddy. Now PAB has GOT to be THE HARDEST WORKING, most detailed oriented, meticulous, dedicated 22 year old I have ever met. Whenever I have tasked her to do something in the office, she always delivers above & beyond the call of duty. Without question - Without hesitation.

So, when she lamented about he $30/day per diem, asked if we were getting that money AT the show, sobbed that she had used all her cash paying for cabs running back & forth to the hotel/Hom.eD.epot/Tarje' for booth items and finally blurted out that she only makes $800 every two weeks to act as the Directors Nanny & PAB, I lost it.

She went on to tell me stories of how:
  • she has been asked to stay late (w/o overtime) to work - sometimes till 10pm or later
  • pick up the director's kids (making PAB late to get her own son to the tune of $10 every 30min late w/o reimbursement)
  • yelled at for leaving the desk to go to bathroom (nobody else is qualified to pick up the MF'n phone)
  • pay to feed the Directors kids w/o reimbursement
  • called at all hours of the night to do random stuff w/o compensation (I say don't answer the friggin phone)
  • if the Directors CC is declined or she doesn't have cash to give PAB, asks her to use PAB's own money and she'll get it back to her - taking days & sometimes weeks to do so.
  • ...and so on & so on & so on

I asked PAB why she didn't "just say no"; why didn't she tell the boss that "this is unacceptable" or "I can not accommodate your requests without immediate compensation" and what not. That was when PAB told me the "thing" that kept her "afraid" to do or say anything. She proceeds to tell me the story about the time she was living with her baby's daddy (BD), but he decided it would be more fun to live with his boy than PAB & his son. BD and his boy thought it would be best if they got PAB to pay B.G.&E and cable set up and then they would put PAB out...on the street. SERIOUSLY? Who puts their kid & kid momma out on the street? WHO DO DAT? N. E. Way...PAB overheard the plot, confronted them and friend decided PAB need a good ole slappin' around while BD just watched. GTFOOHWTBS! PAB fought back while BD watched and must have got some good licks in cause friend presses assault charges. Now PAB has a PBJ (probation before judgement) on her record. And she still got put out.


She's afraid she can't get a job anywhere due to the PBJ on her record (she got an offer somewhere, but it got rescinded after background check - she didn't disclose) and took a job as the nanny for the Executive Director on a family recommendation which morphed into more and now she is getting pimped out at the office.


This girl is the nanny & PAB for $1600/month. DAMN. The average rate in Maryland for just a Live-out nanny is $500-700/week ($2000-2800/month). Just the nanny part. She takes care of those kids & works in office. Hmmmm. I know the kids are in school during the day now, but she need to get paid at least the going rate for both jobs...at least. I'm just saying.


I tried to tell her that she still has options. She is still afraid. She wants to take care of her son without borrowing money from her parents or relying on an inconsistent and unreliable baby daddy...yet the fears are paralyzing her.


I immediately text'd a friend to see if she was still hiring. I called a few other friends to find out if they needed an assistant. I told PAB to send me her resume and I would update it for her and help her shop it around. If you are looking for a nanny or personal assistant, I personally vouch for this young lady. I'm a pretty good read of people and she is what we wish all of our young people would be...Duty, Commitment, Dedication, Perseverance, Drive. If nobody scoops her up, then I'm hoping The Steptoe Group can (will) in a few months. I'd like to see her catch a break.


There ARE options. There IS a way out. I'm encouraging her to keep her head up. This too shall pass. SIGH.