Flat Tire

I was driving the Hummer today (despite the cost of gas) and the "Low Tire" light came on, which, to me, means one of the dang tires is low (go figure). I ask Ron about it and he says to not worry about it, that sometimes if it is too hot or too cold the light will come on, but eventually go out. Why did I listen to that bit of un-informed logic. Uh. Not so much.

I'm out near Baltimore taking care of some business, about to make my way home when I hear this cound like air coming out of a balloon (a big one). Hmmmm The Hummer ain't humming anymore...it sounds more like a rumble. Let me pull ove and see what I can see.

Ahhhh Hell! The fuggin tire is FLAT. Would the "Low Tire" indicator been an indication that a potential problem was brewing? You think? did youi knwo taht a Hummer tire, even a H3 baby Hummer, is as big as my whole freakin body. I'm all Rambo-ette and ish, but da hell with dat. Not in 3 in heels and a dress. And if I was to fugg up this manicure, hell has not see this fury.

I get Ron on the phone (cause he stopped the O.n.St.ar Service - oh we are gonna have a conversation later) and tell him to get me some service and get his butt out here and save me. I'm on a freakin exit ramp - make it so Number One.

And just when you think it can't get worse...it starts to rain. WTF.

Ron arrives in about 30 min and the auto club people arrive about 10 minutes after that. Ron and the auto guy stand out in the rain trying to figure out how to get the lug nuts off the spare and the flat. You just don't snatch a Hummer tire off...these suckers have some kind of key to unlock em. They find the key and in about 30 minutes, the spare is on. Whew.

Hey Baby, I think next time you see the "Low Tire" light, it be best to NOT ignore it. Especially if the Diva is driving it. Now you know.


  1. Anonymous9:58 AM

    From one Diva to another.....I KNOW THAT'S RIGHT CHICA!!!!

    *checking my AAA membership date right now* LOL

  2. Yeah, and never believe them when they say "Oh, that's plenty of gas to get where you're going. Don't worry about it."

    That one doesn't fly either!!!

  3. Is Ron out the doghouse yet?