Day 2 of Captivity

OMG- you have no idea how crazy I am sitting in the cabin right now - day 2 of incarceration. Even if it is a suite w/balcony (pics later-I can't send them from rons blackberry), it is still torture with the imminent threat of being disembarked permantly lurks over your head. They call and check on you (making sure you are STILL not having symptoms), everytime I open the door, Roberto, is standing there with this shyt eating grin on his face...waitingg for me to violate the quarentine. Every now and then I open the door just so I can slam it in his face. Like it makes any difference to him as long as I don't cross the hermetically sealed threshold-sicko. I have watched every movie on the ship TV twice over, slept, ate like a pig, and being generally miserable. Tonigt I'm planning on ordering a bottle of wine just to drink myself into oblivion hopiing the time til 6am (when our captivity ends) will come quickly.

Ron finally awoke from his drug induced stupor to have an intelligent conversation. The part where he starts pshyco analyzing the situation loooking for the rainbow (and he would find great qualities in Attilla the Hun) makes me a tad insane, but then he can be downright hilarious. I'm not mad at him anymore but I told him he had 2 days of absolutely nothing - just the way he likes it- which means if I so much as hear a snivel out of him for the next 10 days, then it is gonna be a swift "crackow" to the back of his head. "You're my vacation slave now." If I say climb to the top of the Colloseum, then I best not even see his eyes look askance. Not a peep mister.

Ron wanted to add a few of his comments to the blog about our captivity...
1. After 30 hours of captivity, we decided to stop feeling sorry for ourselves and go out into the yard (the balcony) and amuse ourselves with a few hours of watching the deck hands practice "man overboard" drills with the tender. Only problem is, they keep running over the life ring, so they save the dummy but he is either has a concussion or a broke neck. Our situation could be worse, Lisa, we could be the dummy. (See what I mean about psycho babble)
2. No matter what size your suite is (100 sq ft or 330 sq ft like ours) there is still a 3 ft door you can't get through on pain of death or thrown off the ship at the next port.
3. Threats from the senoir doctor do have a nullifying effect on your attitude problem, and yet, threats of legal action from my lawyer will get them to clean your room in a timely manner by the hazmat team. See, Lisa, a carefully placed threat does produce results more than a hizzy fit. (I'm bout to put my foot in your ass). Ron's mantra..."Don't make me get on my blackberry and bring down the rath.."
4. I know why you can't get the ship doctor to come to your cabin...cause women like my wife would have hurt a mf. He'd have come down to our cabin and said some crazy shyt bout putting her off the ship, and she would have opened a no. 10 size can of whoopass on him. They probly learned it messin with someone before. Somebody has gotton huurtt before and that's why they only check on you over the phone. Not cause your contagious, but because the staff might get sucker punched by an irate black woman.

(As a side note, there are 3000 passesngers on this cruise ship and so far I have only counted 4 African American - or black people in general - on board including us. WHERE ARE MY PEOPLES? Ron says they are vacationing in the Caribbean and they don't give a rats ass bout no Europe.
THEY (THEM) ran from Europe to explore and conqure some shyt, picked up some brothers and sisters along the way, took us to the knew world that THEY claimed was theirs, and made us make it habitable for THEM for free. Welcome home. Ron added dor effect...Why in the hell do black folk want to go to Europe to see where THEY came from and THEIR ruins and shyt. Black folk don't give a damn bout THOSE peoples, THEY history and stuff so why should black folk spend a small fortune to subsidize THEY shyt. I'm just pllayin devils advocate babe. He's got a point. So the question remains...why the hell are we on this ship, I ask. Ron mischieviously looks at me over the top of his glasses and says "cause my half white woman wife wanted to go get some "culture" and see how her white half conqured the world. He just slays me sometimes.)

Anyway, we are sittin out in the yar killin time... Ron has visions of gradure of how we can kill 2 hours. I'm willing to at least try.

Tommorrow we bust outta her and are off to run the streets of Rome.

Sent via BlackBerry from Cingular Wireless

1 comment:

  1. Geez Oh Pete!
    I don't check your blog for one crummy day and you get sick and put in isolation for 48 hours, are threatened with being thrown off the ship!!! You are right my darling "Steptoes Know Drama!"
    Glad you are feeling better now, though. Are you free now?
    FYI, we are still hoping to close on the 6th, though we can't get moved til the 18th. That's o.k. though, because it gives us plenty of time to clean, paint and set up the pool. Then I will drive back down here and wait on the movers.
    Hope the rest of your trip is so glorious and romantic that you forget about this part. After all you did get Ron as your vacation slave because of it!
    Love you guys!