Party Hopper - Cancun Day 3

3 clubs. One Night. VIP Treatment - whatever that means in Mexico ( but Daniel - our guide - did hustle his behind off to ensure that we had a great time and never had an empty glass). We had to, once again, catch the bus form hell to get to the meeting point for our night out on the town. Later that night we found out just where hell was...Coco Bong..but more on that later.

We spent 1 1/2 hours in the Congo Bar where they had mini-stages for people to dance and shake their stuff on (which the young ladies did), a stripper pole, and women walking around with bottles of tequila hanging from their hips so you could do shots. Yeah Right. After the Congo Bar, we were road marched down to Senor Frogs. Over stimulation is all I can say. They had an ankle harness where they hung female volunteers upside down by their ankles. Once they got the STOOPIT girl up there, they used an air hose to try and blow/blast their underwear off. What baffled me was why did these women get mad when the guy tried to snatch their thongs off or pull off their dress. You VOLUNTEERED. Your dress is already hanging over your head and everyone in the bar has seen your drawers, why not the rest? DAMN - mize well go head and get neck-id. There was an indoor pool and a water slide that ejected the victim out of a window and into a logoon in the dark. Can you say WTF?!!! We drank margaritas out of these glasses that were bout as tall as I was. Lord have mercy. Pace yourself. We had one more club to go.

At midnight, we gathered around our guides and humped (all drunk, loud and stupid - well not us - just everyone else) to the last club of the night called Coco Bongo. We found out almost immediately that we had found Hell on Earth. Three stories of wall to wall people. It was absolute pandemonium. I had to turn around to this girl in our group and tell her in no uncertain terms that if she pushed me one more time (so she could get closer - to what? - you couldn't see anything) I was going to slap the taste out her mouth. Startled, she replies - "I'm so sorry." Uh Huh - no problema - just so ya know.

We found Daniel IMMEDIATLY and told him we wanted out. He had to pratically have us lock arms single file and escorted us out a back door. We had to decend 2 stories through jumping, gyrating, drink spilling, drunk azz people to get to this exit. I never wanted to escape someplace that bad in my life. That is where the Cancun City Bus from Hell comes from - Coco Bongo - we are sure of it.

Walking to catch the bus, Pattey was approached by some man who wanted to know if she wanted to smoke with him. We she said no he then asked, " Would you like a Mexican Boyfriend instead?" UGGGGGAAAAAHHHHH. EEEEEUUUUUWWWWWWAH. You've got to be kidding. You are sitting in an alley smoking weed. Definitly Pattey's life aspiration. That would be a HELL NO!!!!!

We rode the bus away from Hell on Earth, where we were joined by some women who had just finished their partying. They asked us where we were staying. When we said, "The Westin" she went off with her drunk ig-nant self and said "Damn you bitches are all brand name and shyt." WHATEVER, drunk azz heffer. Get off the mfn bus before we toss you out. And as a side note....

Just because you can wear it, doesn't mean you should....

Nuf Said.

Isla Mujeres - Cancun Day 2

We were picked up at the hotel by an "amigo" that spoke un poquito engleis to go on our Catamaran sailing tour to La Isla Mujeres (The Woman Island). Why it is called that - no se. Another terrifying van ride to the drop off point. Mi Amigo dropped us in a parking lot and said "go that way" pointing to an alley. Okay. We finally followed some other sheep behind the hotel and found the marina where we spent 20 minutes figuring out where the heck we were supposed to check in. After we got settled we played in some hammocks and waited to board.

Let the party begin. We sailed out into the Caribbean towards the island and at 9 am we started drinking tequila sunrises. NO FOOD. The water was spectacular - a brilliant tourquise that you just couldn't capture on film. After about an hour sail we arrived just of the coast of Ilsa Mujeres where we stopped to snorkle. It was at that moment that we found out the Erica could not swim. No matter. Fernando rugged a life ring around them both and took her out in the water. She hung on for dear life but after about 10 minutes she got her float on and put her face in the water. She had one of those AHA! - I'm overcoming moments and we celebrated once back on the boat with more tequila.

Back on the boat, we sailed around to the dock and got off for some lunch & shopping. Haggle, Haggle, Hustle, Hustle over some dumb knick-knacks and we were off for the return sail back to Cancun. We did some dancing - the requisite congo line and some line dances ( there is even a Mexican version of the Cupid Shuffle)....

...And that's when a whole heap of stupid happened. They broke out the Spinnaker (cheap version of parasailing) and hooked it up to the back of the Catamaran. STOOOOPIT (that would be me) volunteered to ride the thing FIRST. It was fun while in the air but the getting off is a killer. All I gotta say is "That Shyt Hurt...dumb azz." Here's the lesson...if they don't demo the contraption first - DON'T DO IT.

Other Tips:

- When they say jump - DON'T

- If someone says it hurts and looks like they nearly drowned - DON'T jump up and say me

next.

Problem was, nobody cared that I hit the water like a rock. These people kept on getting on the contraption until there was a concussion...and even then 2 people did it while we tended to this kid who cracked his melon on the boat. Some young guy from Seattle was foolin around while people were flying on the back of the boat. He slipped and cracked his head on the deck. Running and Jumping on the boat after a day of drinkin tequila don't mix. STOOPIT.

Lesson of the Day: 3 shots of tequila = te-kill-ya.

Arriving in Cancun

We all arrived alive in Cancun Mexico today and had a relaxing day at the beach. I am exhausted after diving waves with Pattey and getting my azz kicked around by those suckers, drinking Sangria & Margaritias by the pitcher and shopping till my feet hurt to my kneecaps.

However, I wanted to share with you a few observations/lessons learned from day one:

1. When you get to the airport, RUUUUUUNNNNNN from the building as soon as possible or one of 50 Carlos's will pull you off to the side and try to shake you down in the most polite way possible to sign up for excursions and stuff. Keep you head down, don't make eye contact. Exit the building immediately.

2. If you can't swim, forget playing like a dolphin with the waves. They will kick your mf'n azz...and you will undoubtedly have a wardrobe malfunction.

3. Public transportation is the cheapest way to go, but not necessarily the safest way to go. You take you life into your hands when riding the city bus. Heard screamed on the bus: "We're on an express eleveator to hell, welcome aboard!"

Tomorrow, we are off to Isla Mujeres for the day and then Club Hoppin' - celebrating Pattey's birthday!!!!

Ladies Weekend in Cancun, Mexico

At this time tomorrow, me and my BFF Pattey (and my mother, daughter, Pattey's daughter and friend) will be totally drunk and getting ourselves into some kind of mischief in CANCUN, MEXICO. I have OOODLES of Starwood Points, so I got us two rooms at the Westin Resort & Spa in Cancun. I LOOOOOOOVE me the Westin ---especially that Heavenly Bed. Yes Lord.

I can't wait to hang with my girl. Even though Pattey and I talk on the phone almost every other day, we haven't seen each other in like forever. My girl also lost her husband to cancer on New Years Day and my baby girl NEEDS a little getaway. We are gonna have a blast.

Mi Madre is going too. I have packed the ear plugs cause while she is one of my bestest travel buddies she snores like a rock star. Well, not exactly snores...it sounds more like a chain saw cutting down Yosemite National Forest. I remember standing over her in Paris with a pillow contemplating whether I could really suffocate my mom and get away with it. She wakes up, throws a pillow at me and tells me to figure out a way to deal with it. When we went to Italy, I took my own earplugs. WHEW! I almost freaked out one night in Florence when my earplugs fell out and I woke up in the middle of the night. I found em lost in the sheets. Almost had a nervous breakdown. Pattey recommended heavy drinking and a Valium. Still have plenty from the surgery so I packed a few.

I'm takin the 'puter so I can up my Blog Addiction Score. Stay tuned.

Birthday Party Slide Show

Told ya I would get pictures from the party uploaded. I put it together in a little video slide show. Enjoy!

Can I throw a party or what! Hostess with the Mostest!

Happy 80th Birthday G-Ma Willie

Today is officially Grandma Willie's 80th Birthday, but the party was Saturday night and we had a blast. I had to get G-ma her own box of tissue to carry around cause she cried all night.


We had family come all the way up from Florida and lots of local friends who know G-ma Willie. I have to admit that my Grandmother is a piece of work and when she says some things that you wouldn't even think of actually saying out loud to someones face, I just shake my head and pray that I make it to be 80 years old. Couple of facts bout G-ma:

1. She is an ORIGINAL Diva - like way back - old school.

2. Old School is an understatement...to this day my grandmother clucks her tongue at me and tsk tsk baby...your man is gonna leave you if you keep wearing tshirts to bed and not having your hair and makeup done when he gets up. RIIIGHT! My grandfather (rest his soul) NEVER saw my g-ma without her hair and makeup totally put together. NEVER...I know...I lived with her for several years when I was young....and I never saw her any other way but beautiful. PERIOD.

3. She may be 80 but she has the mind of an elephant and keeps score. If you are one of my girlfriends, then you are one of Willie's girls. Willie's girls don't do things like forget her birthday, Mothers Day, Christmas. If you do, so help you. You are gonna hear about it. My girl Val got read the riot act (in the nicest grandma way) at a party several years back. Here's how the conversation goes:

Willie: Lisa, how's your friend Pattey?
Me: She's doing great, grandma.
Willie (to Val): You know Pattey ALLLLLWAYS remembers to send me a card or call me during the holidays. She is so sweet. I'm sure you've been REEEEAL buys and all.
Val: Ummmmmmm
Willie: Lisa, baby, some of your friends and just SOOOOO kind.

Valerie hasn't forgotten an event yet. Matter of fact, Val was the first gift to arrive from people who could not attend the party. Well done Val - she is still talking about how thoughtful you are. Redeemed.

4. Don't argue with Grandma. She is right, period. Took me a long time to get used to her saying stuff like..."Baby, you shouldn't take Jordan into Baltimore to play sports, he is gonna get himself killed. I saw it on the news." Stop watching the news, grandma. That ain't gonna happen, so just go "Really, grandma? I'll keep a good watch." Arguing with her is futile. She always wins. Besides, she is 80 years old. She can say whatever she wants to, wear purple and spit.

Here are a few of the gems Grandma said at the party:
- "Girl, I haven't seen you in so long. You've grown so much and gotten a little thick. "(WOW)
- (Opening a card with nothing but well wishes inside) - "Well, that was thoughtful." (You just had to hear the tone)
- (Patting guest on the knee, while opening gifts) - "Don't worry, you didn't have to bring any anything." RIIIGHT.

Grandma Willie is set in her ways and, on occasion, gets on my last nerve, but she is family and we love her just the same.

Happy Birthday Grandma. I'm working on putting together a DVD with her tribute, the clip above and a slide show of pictures from the party. I'll have pics up later.

How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

55%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

Found this at fellow blogger Living-Loving-Laughter.... Are you addicted to blogging? Click on image above and find out. Come back and let me know how addicted you are in the comments.

80 Years Fabulous

My Grandmother is turning 80 on November 5th! WOO-HOO! And to me, she doesn't look a day over 60. She is obviously living right! Grandma IS an Old-School Diva.

I am throwing my G-Ma an 80th Birthday Bash at the crib on Saturday and I made a video slide show of her life to show at the party. She is just gonna die. Gotta burn some copies on DVD, cause I know she is gonna wanna share with family.

Tune in Sunday for a report on the festivities....

"When you Are Blessed...80 Years Fabulous"

How Do You Know You Are All Grown Up?

Losing Your Blog Comment Virginity

I've been blogging for over a year now and today was my first introduction to some very serious hateful comments. The aura is gone. Exposing your life to the world opens you up to risk. I'm still willing to take the risk, but the naivety, the blush and wonder of it is gone.

Nevertheless, let's get something straight. Let me set some ground rules. We can agree to disagree. You can feel free to express your opinion on a subject as will I. However, if you decide to make it personal and resort to name calling - ("dumb ass", "Ho", "delusional" to name just a few) and on top of that do all of it anonymous - I am willing and able to bring it. I will track you, I will reverse track you IP address to your home, your job, to where ever. I will ban you, I will nip that nonsense in the bud direct like. I am not going to play with this or even let it escalate to some crazy stalker/hater mess. Uniqua will jump up and open palm slap the shyat outta the first mouth she comes upon.

As a neophyte to this kind of hate, Uniqua took over and she exchanged words. Luckily, I was able to get her under control and get some good mentorship in this arena from someone who has been at this adventure much longer than I. God Bless you and thank you for your advice, help and action.

My daddy always told me to pay no mind to to when people talk about you. They wouldn't be talking about you if you weren't doing something right. There will always be haters. But don't get it twisted...my daddy also told me that in life & business, never wound your opponent/competition (in this case haters), "put em down for good, baby. That way they can't get back up to hurt you later." I will bring down the thunder - don't let the smile fool ya. As my husband is fond of saying..."Careful, she may be beautiful, but she does know how to kill."

I welcome your comments. I would love to be getting more. I welcome your opinion and if you disagree with something - your constructive criticism. Let's chat without the nastiness.

As for my anonymous commenter...I accept your apology. I can't imagine what I could have possibly said in any of my posts that would bring out the kind of venom that I experienced, but I hope that you and your loved one are okay. God Bless.

Diva's in the Park

Mom sent me some pictures (all the way over the internet from the In-Law suite...AKA MTV Cribs) from "Sunday in the Park" .....



Cara is passing all of her DIT (Diva in Training) exams.

A Diva's Gotta Have Shoes

I gotta have shoes. NEED them. So let's just say that I have a shoe fetish and over the past two weekends, I had me a sweet tooth for me some shoes. Yeah baby. The excuse I used (as if I needed one) was that I just HAD to have something new to wear for the 80th Birthday Celebration that I am throwing for my Grandma on Saturday. I can NOT be out done by the Original Diva herself. Now that woman is like Old School Diva. I've gotta come correct.



Anyhoo...I did some damage





And what I love about some of these shoes (the Betsy Johnson's & the Naughty Monkey's) were that they came with an extra set of taps. Just too cool.


I bought the Tadashi Cocktail dress for the party in red to rock at the party. I'm sure Grandma will come in a full ball gown & gloves (or pretty near close).




And YES, Virginia, the new body does rock in this kick azz dress. HA! I even took the bod out for a spin at the gym this week. I was winded a bit but I still got it. I rocked the Master Step class Saturday morning. Gonna try the Spin class tomorrow. Don't want all that money spent to go to waste. Heck Naw!

I was crackin myself up at the gym when this lady I take step with on a regular came up to me and said "Wow, you've lost a lot of weight." I smiled and said thanks, but I was waiting for her to ask me how I did it or is that your body? Kinda like when people walk up to ya and ask "Is that your hair?" I was chuckling to myself as I walked out of the gym thinking that I would answer, the same way I do the hair question..."Why, of course it is my body (hair). I have a receipt." I was crack myself up.

Spree over. Now have to focus on the details for the party.

Toolbelt Diva Strikes Again

I must admit that among many Diva-like qualities that I posses, I am also a TOOLBELT Diva. Yes, I have my own leather toolbelt. Yes, I have the tools to go with it (my favorites being Rybol or DeWalt stuff). Yes, I own a table saw, miter box, tile cutter (the for real kind with a blade and stuff). Yes, I can cut and lay tile (wall, floor...wherever), hang wallpaper like a pro, paint, saw, nail, repair drywall (hang if necessary but I'd rather watch some strapping handy guy do it)...and assemble like a IKEA disciple.

We built an addition onto our house and it was finally "finished" August of 2006. What was supposed to take 18 months took 3 years to complete and the drama (#1 - our Architect turned out not to be one and not even licensed to do home improvement) that lead to us commissioning a sign for the house (True Blessings Estate) is fodder for another blog. In fact, it was the all the drama, tears, heartache and fear of losing our home that led me to start blogging (and the insistence of my country girlfriend - now suburban soccer mom - Terri). If you would like to see a video slide show of the drama and blessings, check out "The Building of a True Blessing." . All the tile, appliances, cabinets, drywall, showers and more - I bought at auction. All of the decoration, wallpaper, paint, etc - I did - cause after cause overruns in an amount that I don't care to discuss - we had to do a lot of the finishing ourselves.

Anyhoo - I finished the family room today by finally hanging the valance and putting the curtains up. Whew. I sanded the fireplace (it was originally fuchsia) & painted it white. Added the bronze tiles to the mantle piece, painted the back wall in a rust "sand textured paint", hung the textured wallpaper, picked all the art, Ron selected the carpet in Turkey, and wha la! we be finished. I love it. It is warm and inviting and leads right into the home theater which is behind the french doors. Here are some pictures of the finished project...

Oh, and P.S. I don't care if you don't like it...we do. Everybody has their own decorating tastes so if you don't care for it...keep it to your dang self or Uniqua is going to make an appearance.

Sunday Afternoon in the Park

I spent a wonderful Sunday Afternoon with Cara. There are times when Cara gets on my last nerve and then there are times when she is just my mini diva - competing with me for the title role. This whole business of starting over with little people when we were SOOOOO close to being empty nesters occasionally tries the limits of my patience. I can say that she keeps us on my toes.

I decided to take her to the "Sunday in the Park" event, while Ron took Jordan to his Lacrosse game. My mother, Cara and I load up in the car at 12:30pm (the event started at 1:00 pm) and were one of the 1st 50 families in line. Lord have mercy...good thing we went early because by the time we left at 3pm, the line to get into the park for the festivities was going around the park and cars were parking anywhere and everywhere. People were waiting for a minimum of an hour to get in the park. No way. We had been through most of the activities by time most people were just getting started.

Cara loves trains, so we started at the back of the event to ride the train. The entire way she called out "Chugga, Chugga, Chugga, Choo Choo!" I couldn't help but laugh. She seemed to be having the ride of her life. We then played "Needle in the Haystack" where they put turkey basters in this big pile of hay and the kids had to jump in and find one. Cara kick hay everywhere, thew it up in the air - screaming and yelling the whole time. Finally she found a baster and was rewarded with a toy, promptly putting it in her "Boo Bucket."

We then went on the "Trick or Treat Trail" where she got to get goodies from some of her favorite and not so favorite characters. Darth Vader & Shrek did not go over well and with a solid scream and a "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" we slid past those two to find Dora & Diego (a real BAAAAD version), Bob the Builder, Snow White & the Wizard of Oz crew. I was glad to see that they had some healthy alternatives cause Cara is trying to work the pure sugar diet and I am not havin it. Right now she only eats when she is practically starving cause we won't give her cookies and candy all the time. If you won't eat "real" food then I guess you won't eat. She eventually comes around but not till she is about to have a hypoglycemic melt down. Works my nerves.

Our last activity was to ride one of the ponies. My mother and I are standing in the line thinking to ourselves that we are gonna stand here for an hour and when she gets to the dang horse, she is gonna have a hizzy fit. We slowly move forward and I'm getting that sinking feeling when she starts fussing and says she is scared. Turns out she was scared of this character called Nelli the Bat. He was kind of scary. We arrived at the front and all Cara could say was "My Turn, My Turn." She loved the pony! Shock & Awe. Didn't want to get off the beastie.

By time we finished the pony ride, the masses of people at the park rivaled the Howard County Fair. We made a bee line for the car and Cara's sweet disposition melted down. She was exhausted and just fell apart. I ended up having to carry her to the car - she be heavy. She took a 30 second nap in the car and got her second wind. She is a trip.

All in all, a good day with my mini diva.

My Fifteen Minutes of Fame

Winning Chapter of the Year has been both a blessing and (occassionally) a curse (a lot more work to live up to expectations). One of the blessings was being asked to do an online radio interview about the National Sales Network and the DC/Baltimore Chapter. Don't know how many people will actually ever hear it, but it was fun to do.

If you want to take a listen....Click Here.

http://www.irocktalkradio.com/JR_Show_Lisa_Steptoe.htm

Women Over 40

I enjoyed this monologue (its so true) from Andy Rooney on Women Over 40...

As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why:

A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, "What are you thinking?" She doesn't care what you think.

If a woman over 40 doesn't want to watch the game, she doesn't sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it's usually more interesting.

Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.

Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it's like to be unappreciated.

Women get psychic as they age.

You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.

Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.

Older women are forthright and honest. They'll tell you right off that you are a jerk if you are acting like one. You don't ever have to wonder where you stand with her.

Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it's not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?", here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. Why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage!

Reflections from Captiva Island

I arrived today on Captiva Island, Fl for a Cardiology Conference. My major institutional account is hosting the conference and I'm here to meet and greet.

Although it is supposed to be beautiful down here (and it is), I really didn't want to leave home. I just got home and there is a lot going on at home. I feel like I'm gonna miss something.

That "something" being the beginning of a new adventure, a new phase of Ron and my life together. I can feel the excitement in the air, that electricity or change in air pressure when something is about to happen.

We've had several of these periods in our life together....
1. The Academy Years - our dating, making it through West Point which all came to a climax during Grad Week. I remember the moment...right after Recognition Parade (I bet my Mom remembers, cause she was there after the parade when I just couldn't stop bawling and didn't know why since graduation wasn't till the next day). I had arrived at the top of my first mountain - VICTORIOUS - and I was overwhelmed in the moment.

2. The Army Years - those were some tough, but fun years. Living together for the first time although we had been together for 4 years at West Point. WOW. I was not fit to be a wife, but Ron (in his infinite wisdom) grabbed me by my shoulders one horrible, confrontational night and said..."I didn't get married to get divorced. I saw something in you way back when, my diamond, and you need to get your s----t together cause I'm not going anywhere." Despite the fact that during the 1st 3 years of our marriage, I tried real hard to drive him away. (WHY? I dunno, cause I was stoooopit). Anyway, I snapped out of it at that moment and started my trek towards divadom. We decided our goal was to get back to West Point to be Outreach Officers, Ron developed a plan of action, we executed and orders were cut. This phase (in my eyes - Ron might have a different moment) came to a climax when I found out I was pregnant. It was a glorious year - we had so much fun - and we decided together to leave the service and strike out on our own.

3. The "Find" a Dream Phase - our 1st corporate job (with the same company), owning our 1st place, our new baby and Ron was still restless. He wanted more. More what? Stuff? He didn't know, but he wanted more so we was gonna figure it out. He decided that he wanted a "Dream Home"and to be a millionaire before he turned 40, but it was killin' him to figure out how he was gonna do that on just our paychecks alone. He met a co-worker who asked all the right questions and said all the right things to appeal to Ron's dream...and if Ron was excited then damn sure I was gonna be. (P.S. If you want to crush your knight in shining armor, crush his dreams and smash his ego - If you want to keep you knights fighting the good fight and delivering your hearts desire, shut your mouth and stand beside him). So we became Amway/Quixtar distributors...and the journey began.

4. The "Build" the Dream Phase - Over 12 years, we built a large organization, traveled the country and even opened up Amway South Africa. Ron and I built a network of friends & family that would rival any one's Rolodex. Ron met the realtor who (after 5 years of looking) found us the house we are still in (and expanded on) today on a trip back from showing the business plan to our organization in Chicago. That person introduced us to our financial planner (Ron calls him our "Rich Dad"), who got Ron to stop thinking that the ONLY way for an average guy to make money was through Quixtar. We build a real estate and asset management company from the ground up, at one time owning 9 properties at one time...and guess who handled the property management and finances for several years...MOI! When we started making WAY more money in our real estate ventures than in Quixtar - we had to walk away. I knew we were transitioning to a new phase of our lives when Ron could walk away from 14 years at P.fiz.er and venture out on his own.

So, the past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind of activity. Ron is on the phone constantly, the fax machine and computer is about to explode. I swear that he is gonna get cauliflower ear from that dayum cell phone and carpel tunnel from the crackberry. But all Ron will tell me is..."Hold onto your spanx baby, what's about to go down will set you free (from the corporate world) real soon. Just hang tough with me, and we will be......

Phase 5 - "LIVING THE DREAM"

It is killing me not to nag, ask a million questions, nag some more...but I see the fire in his eyes - again - and when my man is on his game - well - stand back and watch him burn. I've been told that I WILL be put to work. No plain ole lady of leisure for me. Gotta brush up on my financial knowledge and math skills...He gonna make me CFO. HA! I'm ready with the runway walk and the princess wave. I can handle them books. BRING EM! Oh, and I have no problem spendin' some too. He actually told me to do some dream building while here and look (just look -see) at the beach homes and see what I like. Not a problemo.

Nevertheless, right now, I wanna be home. I don't want to miss the moment. I wanna be there when Ron finally hangs up the phone, closes his computer and says "Baby, the contract is signed. It is done." Champagne anyone?

The sunset was beautiful, but it would have been better - oh, so much better - if "RonnieBear" was here watching it with me.

Pass & Review

Well, we are back to the daily grind from a glorious reunion. This had to be one of the best Class Reunions I've been to...and I've been to all 4. (5,10, 15, 20). Reconnecting with old friends was wonderful and I hope to make a best effort to keep in touch - not letting another 5 years pass before speaking or seeing my fellow alumn.

Unfortunately, the fun is over and it is back to work. The very first thing I had to deal with was a flat tire on my car. Thank goodness for a company car and a company repair service. I just didn't see the diva changin' a tire. Lord, what if I broke a nail.

I'm off to a conference tomorrow. I SOOOOOO don't want to leave home, but that's why they pay me the big bucks. Yeah Right.

Video Clips from 20th Class Reunion

My girlfriend has managed to post some videos from the reunion on her blog. I still can't figure out how to condense my video's into a compressed format. My little snippets are so dang large I can't post them anywhere. MUST FIGURE THIS OUT!!!

Check out the video clips by CLICKING HERE....

There is a great one of me acting crazy after 2 energy drinks...or was I just plain being silly. You guess.

Class Dinner & Concert Update

I promised some pictures from the Class Dinner and the mini-concert that Walter Cunningham put on after the dinner. Can you tell that we were having a blast. We sure do LOOK GOOD 20 years later. HA! We haven't cracked yet.

You know what's really CRAZY...The Class of 87 is still to this day the largest class of African Americans admitted to West Point and the largest group that actually graduated. At the Superintendents briefing, he showed up the statistics on the Class of 2011 and while there is a record number of women entering this year, only 6% of the Class of 2011 is Black. WTF. War - Smore. That is not the only reason we (West Point - aka - The United States Military Academy) can't find and recruit qualified minorities to attend. I looked around the room at all my fellow Black Alumni and what I saw was good looking, prosperous, makin' it happen Black people. The kind of "makin it happen" Black's that I not only want to hang with but also wouldn't hesitate to put my life into their hands. Several of them are still on active duty ( 2 doctors, 1 Aviation Brigade Commander, 1 at NSA and more). WHERE ARE THESE KIDS!!!???? We all agreed that we had to step up our own personal marketing and recruiting campaign or it simply isn't going to happen. The Supe is even talking about "at risk kids" and those are not the same at risk academically kids that we are talking about at most other schools. He said the "at risk" kids that are admitted to West Point graduate at the same rate or better than those who did not have academic risk. WELL, let's get busy.

You can turn your nose up at a military education or the military if you want to. Everybody is entitled to their opinion, but I would NOT be the person I am today and I'm sure all the beautiful Blacks you see in these pictures wouldn't either if we had not attended West Point. Freedom ain't free, there is a price to be paid for your right to live in the "Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave." Are you willing to give back 5 years of your life to the Army for an Ivy League education at the bargain basement price of $0, get paid while in school, have a guaranteed job upon graduation and transferable skills when done if you decided to leave the service? Then what will you do? What will you settle for? You won't even consider it or let your children look at the opportunity? Shame...cause opportunities just don't jump up in your face. You best be prepared, done some homework, "STAND IN THE DOOR"...cause it is only when PREPAREDNESS & OPPORTUNITY meet, that you find fortune.

Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox and back on to the FUN we had at the reunion. Yesterday was one of the most exhausting but exhilarating days. For the 1st time in 15 years (or 2 reunions -10 & 15) has our class been able to participate in the Alumni Parade and Review cause the last 2 reunions the parade was rained out. This year, it was sunny and 86 degrees. It was one of the longest Parades (at least it felt that way) in human history and we did the Alumni March and Memorial Service and then lined up for the Corp of Cadets to honor the 4 alumni classes in attendance (2002, 1992, 1997, 1987) with "Pass & Review." The Cadets march onto The Plain in Full Dress Grey and salute all the dignitaries and alumni and then parade past us in salute. It was so DAMN hot I thought I was freakin' gonna pass out, but I was also choked up. I was moved at the whole ceremony and DAMN PROUD - HUUUAH! to be a graduate. I was in awe.

Almost out of battery power here in the car. I'll get the pictures from the parade up later.

Cupid Shuffle...

Day 2 of our 20th Reunion...and we had a blast. The day started out slow but the class dinner and the "mini concert" after the dinner was one of the best times I've had in a long time.

We started the day off with a trip to the Cadet Store. Ron and I HAD to replace at least one of our "green girls." WTF you ask is a "green girl?" Well, you kinda had to be here (as a cadet) to understand but I will do my best to 'splain it. A "green girl" is a blanket...an adult binkie. Each of us (old and new grad) has a personal and binding relationship with their "green girl." See... a green girl is olive green and one of the most comfortable, transportable, sleep (aka "rack" inducing) binkie's know to modern man. My green girl was one of a few things that got me through West Point. If I didn't have her to wrap myself in and catch a few minutes of "rack" or to just keep me warm and comfort me when I needed a warm touch...since there IS NOT PDA (public displays of affection) at WP...I would have snapped and gone home. But after 24 years and several moves, both Ron and my "green girls" have seen better days or have gone missing. We needed at least one new one for posterity sake. Not only did we purchase a "green girl" but another "throw" for our chaise in our bedroom and numerous other items for our WP collection.
Now that we are "old grads" and the "Corp of Cadets has...gone to hell" we now "collect." WHATEVER. $200 and an hour later we have made our Cadet Store purchases.

Joe and Terri seemed to purchase the ENTIRE store and had to even change checkout lines. Guess they had TOO MUCH STUFF!!!!! We ran into several of our classmates trying to renew a relationship with a green girl and other stuff. Just when I thought Ron and I were crazy, there has to be someone who buys 2+.

After the Cadet Store, we road march back to Eisenhower Hall (technically the "Student Union" for you civilians) for the Class lunch, Superintendents Briefing and Class Meeting. Lunch was fine, slept through Supes briefing and the Class Meeting went ON AND ON AND ON AND ON. By time we got back to THE Thayer, Ron and I barely had enough time for a nap and dress up for the class reception and dinner.

We get back to Eisenhower Hall, where the reception and dinner is going to take place and they have set up this piano in a room of 2000 people off to the far corner behind a wall where 90% of the class would not be able to see nor hear Walter Cunningham play from his new CD. (Check out my classmate in the sidebar of my site here). Well, Ron just was not going to have it. Why is it that they always SHAFT the black man. While "they" made time and room to do a 30 min slide presentation about a guy who was so mal-adjusted that he didn't even graduate with us. Matter of fact, he was kicked out of the Academy 2 weeks before graduation. Go Figure! SOOOOOOOOO. We can accommodate (ie. get a mike, set up the projector, ect) for a NON-GRAD!!!!!, but we simply CAN'T move a freakin' piano out of the back far corner of an over 20,000 sq ft ball room for someone who DID graduate? WTF OVER!

Ron was not going to let it rest. He (being the diplomat that he is) managed to find the manager of Ike Hall and get him to open Benny Haven's (formerly known as the Firstie Club = Senior Club), get a piano moved in there and several microphones so we could conduct a private concert to promote Walter's new CD. THAT IS MY MAN!!!!!!! DONE!!!!!!!!

The concert starts about 9:30 and Walt starts off with "audience involvement." He gets all of us singing old love songs as he plays the piano, then he gets everyone to start singing all choir like...there were 3 ladies who stood up for soprano; me and 3 other ladies who stood up for alto's and so forth. We did about 3 popular gospel songs...which I have on video and will load as an update later... and then Walter premiered his CD. I haven't had this much fun NOR sang like this in YEARS!!!! Seriously. After Walt finished playing on the live piano for 2 hours, his business partner and classmate, Nate J. mixed some jams for us to "DROP IT LIKE ITS HOT" on his Ipod. I danced till my feel almost exploded out of my shoes.

When Ron and I got back to THE hotel, I kicked off my shoes and hobbled up the stairs to our room. I danced and partied till my bunions SCREAMED Uncle...and they did.

I have pics and video which I will update you with later. It is 1:00 am and I just ain't doing it now. Tomorrow we have lunch is Washington Hall - our "Mess Hall", Class Picture, Alumni Parade and Review, Tailgate, and then BEAT TULANE!!!! Yeah Beat Em.

To the left, to the left, to the left to the left.... to the right to the right, to the right, to the right....now kick, now kick now kick, now kick...now walk it by yourself, now walk it by yourself. HA! We did the Cupid Shuffle!!!!

I LOVE BEING AN ALUMNI!!!!! and I had a great time today with all of my classmates - specially Walt, Nate and all my African American Alumn. See you tomorrow.

Reunion Kick-Off Reception

Wow! What a night is all I have to say. I had so much fun mixin' and minglin'...catching up with classmates and old friends and just LMAO (to myself of course) on a myriad of fashion faux pas and at the fact that I would even be worried for one second that I couldn't compete. HA! I have come prepared.

We arrived at THE Thayer Hotel today about 3:30 pm. THE Thayer is the ONLY hotel ON post so it is "allegedly a big deal to be able to get a room here. ALL hype. Call me a hotel snob if you want to, but the rooms at THE Thayer are one step above a room at the Super 8, except the doors here are on the inside instead of the outside of the hotel. For all of this money, I need a mini bar, robe, and something resembling a Heavenly Bed. Not even close. No mini bar, no robe, bed sucks but we do have a coffee pot...IN THE FREAKIN BATHROOM of all places. Whatever. We are here and that should be all that matters.

We take a little nap...well, I do while Ron wheeled and dealed on his crackberry and cell. Then he decided it was time to find out if the plumbing still works after all the surgery. Okay, I'm game...been awhile ya know. Turns out that everything works JUSTA FINE!!!!!! WHEW!

We get dressed and hitch a ride with J&T up to Herbert Hall Alumni Center for the reception. The Steptoe brick in the walkway is holding up nicely. We get into the Alumni Center and it is a freakin mad house. We get our gift bag and hat fine but the whole name tag thingy was a complete MESS! WTF! WHO THE FREAK IS IN CHARGE? Certainly NOT the Conference Chair who walked around viewing the mess and not doing a DAMN thing about it. Irritated the sheeyat out of me. Over 1200 name tags strewn across 2 tables in absolutely nor order. Pandemonium. Being the obsessive compulsive, type A personality that I am, I simply could not let this go, so between myself and my classmate Mike B., we managed to get R-Z organized by letter on one table while his wife and Terri organized A-Q on another. EXCUSE ME!!!! CONFERENCE CHAIR. Do you want to take some LEADERSHIP of this fiasco. Obviously not. Mike and his wife (and classmate) Connie have told me I need to let it go, but DAMN. The SHEEYAT was everywhere.

Anyway, we managed to get it under control and moved onto the bar. Time for some serious drinking but since there is only beer and wine, I best be quick about it since it is gonna take a whole lot of wine to get a tad silly. I decided to just sit back and take a look around to make some observations:

1. 20 years sure do make us look all grown up. Some a whole LOT more than others. Some look not a day difference (RON) and others look like life just beat the crap out of them.


2. I was overdressed but not a problem. As my grandmother always told me, it is better to be overdressed than to be underdressed. You can't fix or dress down UNDERdressed. I ask myself several times, "What, on God's Green Earth, were you thinkin' when you put that on." HOTMESS.


3. I loved Terri's comment about how the more that time passes and she comes to these things, the less she is worried about what she looks like or what she is wearing. Re-read comment #2.


4. Realizing just how great my life is and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Ron, Joe, Terri and I sat for an interview for the West Point Archives and it was great to get a chance to reflect and record for posterity our thoughts on why we entered the Academy, what we expected to get out of our experience, and what thoughts we wanted to leave the cadets there today. Messed my wine high up gettin' all serious but I recovered nicely afterward with a few refills.

Just when I thought I was far gone in the alcohol department, there was one lady who had WAY more than me. She was absolutely hilarious. I managed to get her under her husbands wing who told me that she was doin fine and they were goin to a after party. I told him "No, baby, SHE BE DONE!" Hope she is takin' some aspirin right now cause tomorrow is gonna be a long day.

20th Class Reunion

Ron and I are in the H3 right now, rolling up the NJ Turnpike on the way to WOO-POO (as some alumni affectionately call it) to attend our 20th Class Reunion. (I love my Verizon Wireless Card)

Do we feel old? NOPE. We LOOK GOOD! I'm so excited to see my classmates (at least some of them), but mostly excited to see the African-American classmates (with exception of my girl Terri & Joe - they honorary). Only 90 total graduated in my class (15 women) and all of us were either in the Contemporary Affairs Seminar Club, the Gospel Choir or both. It's gonna be a CAS & Gospel Choir reunion. I just know we are gonna break out in a mini concert.

Well, I'm prepared with some fierce clothes. New shoes and new hand bag. Packed the best jewels and dusted off the tiara (just kidding... I meant bayonet). Of course, I'll keep you posted on the happenings with commentary and pictures. Tonight is the opening reception.

Stay tuned...

Benny Havens, Oh!

Come fill your glasses, fellows, and stand up in a row,
To singing sentimentally, we're going for to go,
In the army there's sobriety, promotion's very slow,
So we'll sing our reminiscences of Benny Havens, oh!

Chorus:
Oh, Benny Havens, oh! Oh, Benny Havens, oh!
So we'll sing our reminiscences of Benny Havens, oh!

Ron and I hosted a "Benny Haven's" (or happy hour for lay people) for the Outreach Team from the Admissions Office. Project Outreach focuses on recruiting minority candidates for admission to the United States Military Academy. Ron and I are not only alumni of the Academy but also former Outreach Officers from 1990-1991. It was a blast having everyone over. We had a great time catching up with old and new. Enjoy the pictures.

Drains, Pain & Adjusting "Your Package"

I now COMPLETELY understand why men are always adjusting their "package". I have been carrying around 2 surgical drains for the past 3 weeks in the exact same position as a man's genitals and I now understand why, on occasion, they have to "adjust" some things. Okay...for the uninformed...when you have a tummy tuck, you end up with 2-3 surgical drains that drain excess fluid from your body.

And where, as God is my witness, does a surgeon see fit to place these little jewels of medical science. Well, ladies...stand up, look down at your pubic mound and imagine 3 holes coming our of the front of your coochie. So, put your thumb on your belly button and then reach your index finger (the one right next to you thumb) to to middle of you pubic mound and that is where 2-3 drains will be coming out. LORD JESUS HAVE MERCY!

One of my 3 drains fell out at week 2 all by itself, thank the Lord. But I had the other two in for a full 2 weeks and if it was not for the Grace of God and at least half a perc every 4-6 hours, I would have simply gone insane! INSANE!

So, I got these two drains coming out the front of my coochie and I have to like get dressed, walk, sit... DO STUFF. Let me just tell you, that "package" occasionally gets in the way, falls out of place (despite serious attempts to tack, pin, tape those things down) and they just pain get situated in the wrong worst kinda way at the most inappropriate moment. You gotta "adjust your package" or I was gonna be suckin down another perc quick like. These puppies pull (they are allegedly stitched to your body) and JUST PLAIN HURT LIKE SHEEAT! That's it. PERIOD. Hand me a glass of water so I can down this pain killer...anybody got a glass of wine to go with that?

I'm walkin in the mall, trying to get a little exercise as prescribed (as well as spending some more of Ronnie Bears moola) and that tube to the drain slips in between you know where...WELL! you gotta get it outta there! You gotta adjust. So, how do you do it without anyone knowing. Well, a lady will go to the restroom and take care of her business as I did. My husband would just grab, pick, move, "ADJUST" his stuff all incongneeeeegro like...as if I didn't see you do it. WHATEVER.

But now I understand. It's a habit born of having a package attached to the front of your body for life. I just had mine for a few weeks. A man has his for LIFE. Sometimes stuff just gets in the way of daily activity and has to be "adjusted" or "moved". Ron just told me that I still don't understand the complete burden "us men carry around. And some of us are more burdened than others and it requires more adjustment." Sometimes I just want to SMACK him...but he did pay for all.

I got my drains out yesterday. They were coming out PERIOD! I told the doctor that I was on the EDGE OF SANITY! One more days with these puppies and I would absolutely SCREAM and jump off some ledge becoming the future Bionic Woman. He told me he would take them out, my numbers were good. Lay back and hold on...this may hurt. WTF?!! Well, I do what he says...he yanks em out and I don't feel a thing. THANK YOU, JESUS. Now I have to teach myself to walk again like a lady and NOT like a man with a huge PACKAGE between her legs. They say 28 days makes a habit. It will now take a month to walk with my legs closed again.

The upside...I wore a pair of jeans today that I haven't gotten into in years. Praise Jesus for blessing the hands of my surgeon. My scar will be undetectable in a few months. He really is an artist and has been blessed. My skin is still sensitive at week 4. Doc says I have about 10-15lbs of swelling to go down. REALLY!!!! He advised I not buy new clothes or alter anything until all the swelling has gone down and he won't take final pictures until 6-9 months after surgery to guarantee all swelling is gone. REALLY!!!! He finally told me the total fat removed....3 2ltr bottles of soda full of fat as an equivalent. DAMN!

Let me just say, this is not of the faint of heart. Looks easy on TV...cause they don't show you the deal during the 6 weeks in between the before and after...but it ain't. Gird your loins, be prepared for a walk with drains & pain. I still don't sleep right...and lets talk getting back on the sex wagon (AND I OH SO MISS IT) at a later date. Ron might not let me discuss the first day back to sex on a blog like it was the first day back to school. He's a closet freak and likes to keep it that way (as he reads this over my shoulder...go away).

Drop me a line if you want more info.

Thank you JESUS! I walking "package" free now!

NSN 11th Annual Conference Slide Show

Rockin' Girl Blogger

This is soooo cool. This is actually the second time I was tagged for this award and I'm finally getting around to tagging my Rocking Girl Blogger friends. Well, I just realized that just about every woman I know/read already has this distinction, so I'll tag the one blogger girl that hasn't been nominated yet.....

HOME AT LAST FARM - Terri is my bestest "country" diva to my "city" diva girlfriend and her husband is my classmate from West Point. This is a woman who effortlessly (at least to me) raises (and home schooled for a long time) 5 kids, tilled & planted a 1 acre garden, painted the barn, took care of 2 goats, a bunch of chickens, rabbits, a cow & some pigs ----all before noon and then hand crafted something. Always made me crazy. Visiting them, when they had the farm, was an absolute HOOT! We would visit the Amish, antique shop, play in their personal petting zoo, skeet shoot (or shoot something in the "yard" - they had billions of acres), shoot off REAL fireworks only to have to hide from the county police cause the neighbor (bout a mile away) though we were "gonna kill her." I have laughed so hard in her kitchen almost rupturing my spleen, reading books aloud that she had on her shelf (and they have bout 2 billion books- she reads books like I eat candy) such as Goat Husbandry...you just HAD to be there to read about the care of a male goat - DISGUSTING.

Terri and family have finally moved to the suburbs due to her man's new job and she is still trying to figure out how she can build a chicken coop that the neighbors won't throw a fit over. She just slays me all the time...and NO you just can't have another GOAT. It isn't going to go well in suburbia.

We are spending the 1st weekend in October at our 20th Reunion from West Point together and I just know we are going to tear the Academy up. I'm still waiting for her call about what I'm wearing...Girl - YOU KNOW I'M ROCKIN' THE BEST STUFF I GOT. I tell ya one thing...TERRI, you are NOT allowed to wear those damn Ugg boots. PERIOD. It is simply a no go. I love you....now you have to tag at least 5 of your favorite "Rocking" girl bloggers.

See you in two weeks....