9/8/07

My Alter Ego - Uniqua

Uniqua is her name and her species. She’s graceful, agile, and as light on her feet as a ballerina. But when it comes to playing, she’s more “adventure” than “ballet.” Unafraid and daring, Uniqua loves to run, climb, and ride her bike faster than anyone. She also loves to tell silly jokes, make silly noises, and tickle her friends. Yes, Uniqua is mischievous, but she’s also sweet – she knows whether her friends are happy or sad, and she’ll always say something to show that she cares.

Unless you have kids and watch the Backyardigan's, you have no idea, but Uniqua is MY GIRL, MY ALTER ego. She has always been the super hero plump girl that that was lurking inside me and always waiting to break out.

Well, I went and had "some work done"....(which I had to get several brochures from Dr. Markmann's office since now I have a "following"...as if I was the colored girl guinea pig for plastic surgery...considering his practice is now about 70% African-American women)... and like I've said before...NOBODY TELLS YOU ABOUT THE IN-BETWEEN...all you see on Discover Health & Extreme Makeover is the before and after. Well, let me tell you there is some SHEEEEYAT during the in-between and me and Uniqua are having a conversation again.

Between the body compression suit, the corset, the 3 drains, the foam padding in certain places to keep the fluid down, the swelling, blah, blah, blah (I'll spare you the more gruesome details), I don't look a damn different. At least in clothes. So Uniqua and I had a pity party over 800mg of M.otri.n and a val.i.u.m, until Ron decided that I would probably feel much better if he sat me in the shower for a while (we have a seat in the shower). So, it takes like FOREVER to get me out of the clothes I have on, unhook my drains, remove the corset, the pressure stockings, the compressions suit and WHALAH I'm naked.

Ron immediately starts mumbling and cursing under his breath..."this sh*& is going to cost me more than just the procedure. Now I'm looking at alterations, new clothes, hell." When you can look past the swelling and stitches (which will dissolve, I've been told) I will eventually be FIERCE!!!!

Right now Uniqua is still hanging on to the title role.

3 comments:

  1. Gee, I am dying to see you! When did the doctor say "the new you" would be readily visable?
    How's the swelling?
    Terri

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  2. Anonymous2:57 PM

    Hang in ther girl - beauty hurts..

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  3. Uniqua -- My son has me watch the Backyardigan's with him. I like Uniqua, so you must be pretty cool.

    So you must have had some body sculpting done. Maybe that's posted on a previous day.

    Either way, thanks for checking me out.

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