1/3/09

It Takes Energy to Manage a Pigsty

I can't take credit for the title...it came from TSJThings from a comment I made about messy people:

I find it amusing that some people expect you to hate someone, just cause they do. If you don't, then you are considered a sheep. Pathetic. Your hate, your rage, your misery is YOURS. You marinate in it and stop trying to drag me in to your pigsty.

Messy people. There seems to be a lot of them here on the Internet. Messy people are like pigs in a pigsty...they like to revel in their own hate, rage, misery...just like pigs like to revel in their own ish. Messy people rant and rave about their their lot in life, how awful things are and how heinous someone else is. That part is the worst about messy people - when they find a reason to hate someone (they were slighted in some way, they got into a fight or picked one with someone, they just don't like someone for any number of reasons) they take that hate to a whole new level - EXTRA!!

When messy people hate another person, they don't simply stay away from that person and move on with their life. Messy (pigsty) people find every way possible to try and bring their hate out into the public domain...like pigs in the sty, they jostle the other pigs - grunting, snorting, slinging ish around, trying to get the other pigs dirty with their slop. Messy people will spend an inordinate amount of energy and time railing against the object of their hate, resort to name calling and character assassinations. They spend their time trying to get other people to join them at rolling around in shyat and you can almost hear them cackle with glee when they gather another pig to their sty spreading more gossip and attempts at bringing the object of their hate down low.

And, heaven forbid, you personally manage to not get any shyat on you. Heaven forbid you refuse to jump into the sty with them and agree with their hate & rails against the world. Heaven forbid that you don't have a problem with the object of their hate and derision. When you don't become messy with them, you are labeled a "sheep", a "cult follower" and worse. When you don't join them in the destruction, they turn on you - not like simple pigs, but more like wild boars - and try and gouge you on their tusks. That is the moment when you need to recognize you are among messy, crazy people - and walk away.

I simply do not have the time and energy to put into hating someone else and trying to get the world to hate them too. I refuse to surround myself with that kind of negativity. It is absolutely draining to be that miserable, hateful, negative. It is exhausting...it takes more muscles to scowl, frown and make a fist to raise at the sky. I'm just going to move on and instead of putting my focus on people I don't like, I'm going to enjoy and spend time with the people I do.

I have no problem saying what I want to say if I think someone is in the wrong; however, I am not going to hate someone and join you in calling that person a "byatch", "crazy", "f*&king whore" and worse - JUST CAUSE YOU DO. I am not going to join the messy people and wish that someone hurt that person and/or physically assault them. I have absolutely no reason to roll around in shyat with you. And if I ever become a target of said person (I can't even imagine how or why I would - but if I did) and was "run off her site" and or "banned", then so be it. I still am not going to join you in the pig sty. I enjoy my life, my family and my friends way too much to expend the time and energy to join the messy in the Hate Her Festival. You won't find me on your site skipping around the bonfire chanting "Burn her, burn her." I will chalk it up to a lesson learned, a friend lost (it happens), and get on with my life.

I like her, I enjoy her company, I consider her a friend. Does she have issues? Yep. Don't we all?Some big, some small. From what I've seen and heard, she has come a long way, has grown a lot, and is still a work in progress. Aren't we all? Shouldn't we all be working towards becoming a better you? Can she be edgy, "evil" & snap crazy from time to time. Yep and she freely admits it. The delivery may not be my style from time to time...it shouldn't be...it's hers. If I am her friend, like I say that I am, then I accept her for the good and the bad. When we have a disagreement or misunderstanding, I take the matter up directly with her via phone, email or face. I don't go the eff off in the comment section.

I've been accused of never having been a target of her attacks...well, I have. I once posted something on her group website that she didn't like and she ripped me a new one. I was shocked by the intensity in her response, but instead of snapping crazy back at her in the comments, I sent sent her an email (that did not contain a hateful retort) explaining my position and asking her about her remarks. She immediately called me on the phone and we talked it out. She then removed the post and her remarks from the site - without any prompting from me.

What I am witnessing now among the haters is that instead of taking your issues off line and working it out, they would rather fight it out in public, slinging shyat everywhere and then sniffing the air admiring their own funk. Every fox smells its own hole. Listen to yourself, messy people. You are behaving in the same exact manner that you accuse your hate target of doing. Let it go. Clean up the your mess, get out of the sty and get on with living.