Motivated to Be VAIN as Hell

After 3 weeks at my new job, I have realized that I am going to become even more VAIN and obsessed about my health & well being. PERIOD. You do what you like, I've seen enough to make a multiple theater, multiple war Veteran drop to their knees and weep.

If you don't already know, uncontrolled diabetes and morbid obesity (and/or the combination of the two) results in the most hideous, destructive, debilitating co-morbidities and other disease processes imaginable and then some. Add on top of that gruesome picture the possibility of chronic diabetic/venous ulcers (that don't heal for months/years), progressive amputations, blindness and a whole host of other "just make me wanna die" mess. If you really understood, if you really had to face up close and personal this mess you (or anybody in your family) would walk around eating any ole damn thing you can put quickly in your mouth OR walk around talking bout how you just got a touch of damn sugar. DA HELL IS THAT STOOPIT ISH. It's a little late to take that mess seriously when they are bout to cut you leg off below the knee - JUST FOR STARTERS.

On my first day calling on clients, I did a consult with a woman that weighed over 400lbs and had ulcers and large open wounds on both legs that have been there for over 15months. Her lower extremities were the size around of #10 cans of whatever. HUGE. SWOLLEN. ANGRY RED. Skin flaking off. Open, weeping wounds. This poor woman was working a full time job, mostly on her feet and was constantly in pain, but didn't want to do bariatric surgery (which her health plan approved) cause she didn't want to deal with a bunch of loose skin when she lost the weight. ARE YOU SERIOUS? HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR LEGS? Maybe not. I don't know. On top of that mystery, she was non-compliant with the standard therapy for venous insufficiency (compression) as well as the therapy I was working with her on. This bubbly, kind woman would rather suffer with chronic wounds covering both of her legs from the knees down cause all of the treatments and solutions were inconvenient. FOR WHAT. FOR WHOM? Once again, I was screaming in my head...ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!!...all the while gently coaching her on why she should become consistent with her treatment. I got her to agree to be more consistent, but we will see. I simply couldn't imagine living life like that. She told us how at Christmas at her mothers house, how she had to put towels under her legs so as to not get the exudate (drainage) from her wounds onto the carpet. ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!! But taking care of yourself is inconvenient.


I have also spent the last 3 days looking at and discussing hundreds of chronic wounds in primarily elderly - diabetic - immuno-compromised and/or obese OR all of the above combined. NASTY. HORRIFIC. PAINFUL. There are other causes & etiology for wounds (ie. pressure, resulting from surgery, accidents, complications from paralysis/amputation). Those sadden me too, but what I just don't get - what I am having a hard time coming to grips with are the patients that got that way due to the lack of proper care & maintenance AND then want to be recalcitrant about treatment and getting better. I JUST DON'T GET IT.


That consult and this past training class CONVICTED me in the mind and spirit to NEVER LET MY BODY GET OUT OF CONTROL as a result of my personal lack of accountability and responsibility for my own well being.

The images are burned onto my retina. I'm way to vain for all of that...and that is all I'm gonna say about it.