Today my azz got a bit singed by a "friend"...but after the conversation...I'm thinking this is one of those Claymation relationships...where if you get to close, you just might get some 'mation all over ya. They smudge.
One of my friends got laid off from a major pharmaceutical company recently after close to 18 years there (sounds familiar). This person asks to see my resume...I show it to him. He asks me to send it to him...I do. When a recruiter called me to see if I knew of any people that would be a good fit for the position she was looking to fill...I sent her his contact information.
Long story short, I got a call today telling me that this individual did get the job and all is right with the world. My brow knitted. Why? Cause I just spent 20 min on the phone with his wife and she didn't say a damn thing to me. NADA. Just went on about how he was getting his certification to do nutrition consults and whatnot. I didn't think anymore about it. She said all was hunky dory...I believed her. Why shouldn't I? We are supposed to be friends (for close to 19 years - you would think).
I sent a text to my "friend" and asked him "If there was some good news that he wanted to share with me." He responded with this (which I will abbreviate):
From the military you'll recall that if you don't want something known, don't tell anyone...I never told anyone except [my wife], my kids, parents and [name removed] who referred me (it wasn't my name)...I still would appreciate you keeping it quite as I don't want to be bombarded with calls and resumes...and BTW you are one of the first that have confirmed [with].
So why did this message set my britches on fire?
1. You had no friggin problem "bombarding" me with questions and calls when you needed some help...you hand no friggin problem asking me for ish when you wanted something, but now that you GOT YOURS you don't want to be "bombarded with calls". Let me tell you something, GOD DON'T LIKE UGLY. And to me, that smacks of some selfish bullshyat.
2. We have known each other for close to 20 friggin years. We build a business together. We broke bread together. We shared in each others hardships and triumphs for years...right up to the time we decided to go on our own separate way and pursue a different dream than yours...then...well ya'll was busy- ALL THE DAMN TIME. But we never were. We tried (at least The FireMarshall did) to maintain contact - a relationship. When things started to get a little shaky at the job rancherero, we started hearing from you. Hmmmm. Okay. NOW we are not good enough friends to hear about your latest success. WHY? You think we would be out around the town blabbing and/or trying to hit you up for a save? Who we friggin gonna tell and if you asked us not to say anything then we wouldn't - WTF did you think we would do?
3. So, I'm the first one you confirmed the story with. Ummm, does that mean you been lying to everybody else so you wouldn't have to try and help or council anybody. That's some cold hearted shyat.
After thinking on it for a while, I decided to not let the matter drop. Too much silence has gone by between the four of us and if your wife is comfortable lying in my damn face about what's going on with your lives, we must not really be a part of it. Just so you know, NOT ONCE, did we lie or omit anything to you. NOT ONCE. Not while we where in business with you, not when we were planning to move on (we spent months transitioning our team to you), not when we started working on our new dreams, not when we had some successes. Perhaps you didn't really give a damn.
WHY? Was it because we were always just acquaintances? Was it because we really had one of those Claymation relationships. FAKE. I would be interested to know.
I told my "friend" the following: "Ya know, I just wanted to say, I'm not amused. Now that I know that [The FireMarshall's] are just acquaintances & not worthy of such news as we might blab and try to milk/use you for your new found success, [we] will behave accordingly."
I'm so disappointed. What's even worse...I don't think he will get my point of view AT ALL. Perhaps I'm all messy again. Practicing my skills as a Master Koolaid Swimmer -all up in their stuff. Perhaps. But this is how I feel about it. I got it off my chest and now (as Monnie would say) DING....I'm free to move about my life again.
