Issues and Therapy

Yesterday, my daughter was telling me about an ongoing broo-ha-ha with one of her longtime "friends" and was asking me my advice and guidance on the matter. The latest incident between them was the friend deleted my daughter from her FB profile and when my daughter asked her friend why she did it, what was the problem...the "friend" said that she didn't trust her, that my daughter had lots of issues and needed to get therapy. When asked for a clarification on why she no longer trusted my daughter and what exactly she thought the issue were...no information was forthcoming. Just a plain "get help for your issues."

Mmmmmkay. I told my daughter to stop fretting about it. That her friend (who I have know for years and at one time lived in my home for months) had plenty of issues too...needs therapy herself...and since they can't seem to be able to discuss what the exact issues are that keeps the contention between them, leave her alone. Relationships change, people grow; some don't. Some people just want to be miserable and want to try and make you miserable too. Walk away, move on.

I put up on my FB page a comment/status update that read:
Lisa thinks that the same people that are quick to tell you that you have issues and need therapy...NEED IT THEY DAMN SELVES. Humph!

I believe that to be the God's honest truth. When you live in a glass house yourself, perhaps you shouldn't be throwing stones. Well, my daughters friend proceed to send me emails laying me out on the carpet basically telling me that I need to mind my business and stay out of what is going on between her and my daughter:
What goes on between me and Erin, should be between me and Erin... It has nothing to do with you.

DA HELL. I believe she has confused me with being one of the "girlfriends" and not a mother. IT IS MY FREAKIN' BUSINESS, especially if she comes to me for advice and guidance. Take the ish somewhere else and get a freakin grip. You don't know who da hell you are talking to...and I told her as much in my reply:

I'm not taking sides and never did. What I find offensive is the
fact that I have KNOWN my DAUGHTER for 25 years and you for 8 and that you think you are a resident expert on who needs therapy and who doesn't. I KNOW for a fact that BOTH of you need some damn therapy.

The shit that is going down between the two of you is stupid and childish. Erin coming to me to discuss with me the situation is NORMAL as her mother and when she doesn't understand and is trying to get
clarification on what the situation is and guidance in trying to resolve the matter is not a reflection on YOU or an indication on me taking sides. I am acting as a concerned MOTHER. I want the
two of you to remain friends.

However, your consistent remarks and jabs at Erin about her having "Issues", your inability to trust her and more without clarification or justification on exactly what those issues are and the exact reason for not trusting her are a PROBLEM...and perhaps you need some therapy too in order to resolve you "issues" with Erin...if you even want to
have a relationship.

If not, then why not just stop. Stop the innuendo, stop the jabs, stop the bullshit...and then I won't have to be 'in the middle."

Do not ever presume AGAIN that you are on equal footing with me and can call me on the carpet for acting as a mother. Been there and
done that - which you have not - yet. When you have been on this earth and have experienced as much as I have, then you can call me on the carpet. Don't let it happen

Mrs. Steptoe

Obviously, she didn't really read the message or take anything in it to heart since she wrote me back and told me that I "didn't really have an understanding of what was going on", that she wasn't "criticizing" me, but addressing my jabs at her. You know what. I'M DONE WHIT YO AZZ. I am a grown azz woman and I don't have time for y'alls highschool angst bullshyt. GROW THE EFF UP and have a freakin conversation like grown women do. I advised Erin to try that and you want to continue to play childish games. FINE with me.

If Erin wants to talk to me about you, I'm gonna continue to say my piece. If she doesn't want my opinion then she knows damn well to not ask - cause she KNOWS imma say what I damn well think. PERIOD.

I ain't one of your girlfriends. Don't forget it. I'm so glad I'm past that childish crap. If I can't have a discussion with my friends when we have problems, then we don't need to be friends anymore. JEEZ.

Erin - move on.
Your "Girlfriend" - Get a grip and move on. You are effin with the wrong one.